Back from 1st trip and moving foward...how do you cope? - Russian Ukrainian Belarus Travel Music Woman Dating News

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Back from 1st trip and moving foward...how do you cope?
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Posted by: smoke20

Hey guys and gals,
Just got back from my first trip to Ekaterinburg and the main question
I have is....how do you cope in moving forward? What I mean is that my
RW, Sveta and I have decided to continue corresponding and will make
more trips to get to know each other better. In the inbetween timing of
corresponding, her visit here to the U.S. and my trip(s) back to Ekaterinburg
how do you keep from going nuts? Sveta, doesnt seem to be fazed by
this. Granted, its only been a couple days since I've been back but part
of me is still in Ekaterinburg and being a "newbie" to this want to know
how everyone thats been where I'm at now, "What gets you through?"
Any advice, suggestions, etc. are greatly appreciated!
Smoke20

"Smitten BIG TIME!!" (LOL)

Posted by: Spakoyna

There is no easy way to cope.

I did not handle it well and within a week had made up my mind to go back as quickly as possible. I was smitten big-time. and was back with my darling 4 weeks latter for a month. All you can do is write letters and talk on the phone. When I returned after my second trip it was worse for me. I am the type of person that when I fall for someone or want it I do something about it. It was very frustrating for me as there is nothing you can do about the visa process except wait.

Posted by: smoke20

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spakoyna

There is no easy way to cope.

Spakoyna,
Same feelings here! I realize everyones situation is different, however
did your RW seem to be okay with coping or was it just as frustrating
for her? Sveta seems to be okay but I dont know if she is just trying
to put on a "brave face" for me as I have been trying to do when we
correspond now. Did it seem to faze your RW one way or another?!?
-Smoke

ps Ive already decided to go back in September, as she wont be able to
visit me here in the U.S. until October or November because of obligations
at work!

Posted by: mistermopar

smoke20, well the only thing I can think of is to call her,write her and go back asap.
Maybe find a hobby that will keep your mind busy so you will not always be thinking of her,it can and will make you go crazy.

Randy

Posted by: Spakoyna

Quote:

Originally Posted by smoke20

My darling coped very well and was very patient for the most part. We were told it would take 3-4 months for her to receive a visa. She was convinced it would take a year. I think that helped her to cope. When I found out it would be more like 8 or 9 months was when it hit me. I had a lawyer and he was strait forward and correct.

Posted by: vic2012

Quote:

Originally Posted by vic2012

I've been caught and I have to pay for calls to Russia.

Voipcheap, my provider has twigged on to the fact that, I spend 3 hours a night to Siberia for free. They say I have broken their "fair usage policy" and I must pay 1p per minute.

So I've just signed up again in a different name (cost another Ł10) And, my calls are still free!!!

Need I say more.
I sit here with my Multitran (online dictionary) and IMtranslator on screen and, for hours, we just talk.

Of course, the main topic of conversation is "when we are together................"

There's no easy way Smoke, but 2 or 3 hours a night on the phone goes some way to alleviate the temporary loss.

P.s. I am pleased that things are going well for you. I think everyone here is happy to see success in our quests

Posted by: JamesB

I think you are just feeling the things we all feel.Rw seem to have a better coping mechanism than us.Liuda was always very patient and reassuring but i was always wanting to move things on.Now 11 months later and we are married.I left her today and came home and again i wait as she has to apply for a visa.Keep your chin up and stay positive.

Posted by: GoingToRussia

smoke20,

The first 3 days I was back was horrible. I recently quit smoking and wanted to start again. I just missed seeing her, hearing her say good morning, and having breakfast with her. It was like something was missing from my life. It is still difficult but has gotten better. I hope to return in the fall. One of the first things she said to me on our last day together was, "... you will write to me?". I think you just have to keep in touch as best as possible. My GF and I use a web camera which helps very much.

My GF was also rather calm about our separation but was very excited when I asked if I could come see her this fall.

It isn't easy,
GTR

Posted by: waiting123

Smoke, it is not easy.. I met my girl a few times, then decided to go back to Russia and Marry her there in St. Petersburg. I have noticed she is a better at coping with the time than I am, however we talk at least twice a day. I use www.pennytalk.com, we have great talks for several hours at a time and it only costs 0.2 $ per minute with a 0.49 $ connection.

I can not wait to see her again, and soon we will be together, as soon as immigration gets our visa approved.

I agree with the above, call as often as possible, use ICQ, and get a hobby!!!

Best of luck!!!!

Posted by: GoingToRussia

I think RW handle it better because it is a bitter sweet moment. Yes they are happy they are in a relationship but at the same time they realize if they marry, they will have to leave their homeland, friends, and family. I imagine they are concentrating more on what they will lose instead of gain. I know I would have to do some heavy thinking if I was to move half way around the planet.

GTR

Posted by: mistermopar

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoingToRussia

I think RW handle it better because it is a bitter sweet moment. Yes they are happy they are in a relationship but at the same time they realize if they marry, they will have to leave their homeland, friends, and family. I imagine they are concentrating more on what they will lose instead of gain. I know I would have to do some heavy thinking if I was to move half way around the planet.

GTR

It is a huge choice to make GTR.There are many things you have to think about before making up your mind to move.
That is what I am working towards right now.Getting my house ready to sell,giving up the thing I enjoy soooo much,drag racing,and the list gos on.

So I would guess that the RW would also have a lot to think about also,the family and things they love so much.

Randy

Posted by: dagpop

Smoke, The waiting is the toughest thing you will ever go through.Its been over 6 months,since I seen Rima.We are in the final stage of the visa process.The only thing that keeps me going is talking on the phone to her and getting her e-mails.Your woman will always be on your mind, all the time.There is not a day that goes by without me thinking of Rima.The only thing that keeps me going at the moment is knowing that the visa process will soon be over and Rima is my reward.One thing about the stage your in now,you will do a lot of waiting and your emotions will be like a rollercoaster.

Posted by: instantorture

o man, itz hell. When I visited my beloved, and came back to my country, I was sucked up...couldnt resist being by her side again, but work held me up..but as soon as I got an opportunity to take some hols, I got bak to her and it was so gud again..........now I jus wana marry her and b wid her forever!

It's really difficult to cope, believe me....I wasnt able to concentrate at all in my life...and with the stress: