Horrible Child Custody Problem. - Russian Ukrainian Belarus Travel Music Woman Dating News

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Horrible Child Custody Problem.
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Posted by: jlsilicon

I have a Child Custody Immigration Problem. I married a wonderful woman in Russia 6 months ago. We have a beautiful marriage. I spent about 5 months living with her and her children over there; we got our own appartment -and I got a taste of the real life there. The people are very polite, deep, and helpful.

About the problem. We are trying to get her and the children over here to USA. But the jerk father has spent no more than 6 months with them in the kids' entire lives (the oldest is 4 yrs). And has only started giving any child support about 2 years ago, barely enough to pay for a baby sitter. Now in the last few months since we are taking him to court for custody, he is providing 'adequate child support'. He only sees the kids a half day per month. And claims that he is 'doing best for kids' to keep them in Russia.

The kids even desparately look to me as a father, because they have had no 'available' father in their past. She had given birth and raised the children while the father was 'out of town' having fun for years.

We are going to court. We have a lot for us: all of the family support, psychology report of the kids (they think of me as their father), 5 months of me with family and kids in past year, minimal Ex support, etc. Our lawyer insists that we can win, but we are worried that the odds are still bad.

What else can we do ?
Any Help is appreciated.

Posted by: Ms.Smarty Pants

Quote:

Originally Posted by jlsilicon

We are going to court. We have a lot for us: all of the family support, psychology report of the kids (they think of me as their father), 5 months of me with family and kids in past year, minimal Ex support, etc. Our lawyer insists that we can win, but we are worried that the odds are still bad.

What else can we do ?
Any Help is appreciated.

In my opinion, to go to court is not wise way here. Long nervous way and a lot of money without garantees.

Please, you wife can write me personal message on the forum.

Posted by: jlsilicon

> " In my opinion, to go to court is not wise way here. Long nervous way and a lot of money without garantees. "
- Thank you for your oppinion.

The Ex refuses to give permission. Says he is 'doing right for kids' -but the kids don't even know him. He won't budge. But still gives little to the kids. He quotes as saying that the Russian Laws and Culture allow him to leave his family with no responsibilities -but still controlled by him.

We are somewhat sure that the Ex mother is pushing the Ex to do this. He acts like a child - chasing wild interests in life, with no self wisdom.

How do you suggest we solve this then ?

Posted by: firemansam

Quote:

Originally Posted by jlsilicon

> " In my opinion, to go to court is not wise way here. Long nervous way and a lot of money without garantees. "
- Thank you for your oppinion.

The Ex refuses to give permission. Says he is 'doing right for kids' -but the kids don't even know him. He won't budge. But still gives little to the kids. He quotes as saying that the Russian Laws and Culture allow him to leave his family with no responsibilities -but still controlled by him.

We are somewhat sure that the Ex mother is pushing the Ex to do this. He acts like a child - chasing wild interests in life, with no self wisdom.

How do you suggest we solve this then ?

To quote someone else (and I appologise for not remembering who!!) You could try a Poker trick. Offer him (not in writting of course) to have full custody and all the costs involved in raising the kids by himself. Obviously it would be a bold bluff but it might scare him into reality? Still, this might not be such a great idea, but it is a thought....
My fingers are crossed for you mate,
Sam.

Posted by: Leprechaun

Offer him what fireman says OR offer him a gift of money to back off and get something in writing.....

If this is "the right thing to do" or not, I dont know.

Its just what I would do, but dont forget its just another persons side and not the right answer,

Have others here been in the same situation???

Posted by: OzGuyLooking

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leprechaun

Have others here been in the same situation???

Yes, Markgm and he was going to get a lump of 2 by 4 to offer the guy something different, they did do something but I cannot rememebr what it was and it worked. You may want to PM him but the reply may be somewhat slow as he is in Ukraine ATM.

Posted by: RobOhioGuy

As some of you may already know, Natalya and I have been working on obtaining custody of Svetlana to bring her here to be with us. Our situation is different than yours Jlsilcon. Sveta has not seen her biological father in several years. He has not paid any support in several years. During the trial, we were able to show the court that he was only interested in a pay off. Natalya's cousin had taped a telephone conversation of him saying that he would be willing to grant consent in writing if we paid him $20,000.00

I can empathize with your desire and your sincere wish to have your family whole.

I have to tell you that no russian court is going to grant sole custody to the mother when the father is sending support and visits them. What he is doing is FAR in excess of what the typical guy in eastern europe will do. Perhaps you might want to consider offering him some money to give you permission in writing to take the kids out of the country. But your not going to have any success wining a court case where the father is paying support and spends any time with them.

Posted by: jlsilicon

WE WON IN COURT !

Posted by: jlsilicon

WE WON IN COURT !
We were granted FULL CUSTODY of the children - with ALL Travel Priveledges.

Posted by: Chrismc

Quote:

Originally Posted by jlsilicon

WE WON IN COURT !
We were granted FULL CUSTODY of the children - with ALL Travel Priveledges.

That is great news for you JL...tell us how did you go about it and what happened in court if you can?

Chris

Posted by: markgm

Great to hear Mate I knew you would it is alot more easier these days in FSU to win custody cases yours is the 5th i know of and all have won.

Posted by: Chrismc

Quote:

Originally Posted by markgm

Great to hear Mate I knew you would it is alot more easier these days in FSU to win custody cases yours is the 5th i know of and all have won.

So what has made the difference Mark and is this applicable for both Russia and Ukraine?

Posted by: markgm

I'm not sure mate but they seem to favour the mothers more these days both in the Ukraine & Russia having alot more women in these sorts of positions Lawyers, Judges etc certainly helps there has also been a big influence on this sort of thing from the west in the last couple of years.

Posted by: cedarwind

Quote:

Originally Posted by jlsilicon

WE WON IN COURT !

Congratulations...good news for you and the welfare of the child

Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:

Originally Posted by jlsilicon

WE WON IN COURT !
We were granted FULL CUSTODY of the children - with ALL Travel Priveledges.

Great news!!!

Is there a chance that you can adopt??