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integrated or what?
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Posted by: Jutman

Today we had an apointment, to meet after schol and go to the shopping center.

I get ready, go to the car, get sms, 'I will be going with the girls, to the center, maybe we meet next time'.

what is that????

Posted by: Ade

Hi,

That's a very good sign she's doing things with other people; Seida is doing a lot on her own or with a Russian friend, and I'm sure it won't be long before she's socialising/shopping/whatever with new English friends.

Ade

Posted by: BradIL

Ade--- you've always been confident Seida would make a healthy adjustment to Sheffield.

Curious if its shaping up that way? I know Sheffield is new to her, but do you sense she is developing a "rhythm" of her own in her life with Sheffield? (I know-I know its an opinion of perception... but curious about your thoughts)

Posted by: Ade

Hi,

Seida is starting to get her own 'swing', all it really needs now is for her to develop full-on friendships with people here which are independent of my social group, and she'll be flying.

But she has settled really well, and is happy.

Ade

Posted by: zaniac

I have to admit even though I'm no way near to where you guys are (still on ground floor almost), my main worry would be with regards to how well a future foreign partner will settle in England.

Jutman, as Ade says that is agood sign she is progressing with her life in her new land

Posted by: clever1

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jutman

Today we had an apointment, to meet after schol and go to the shopping center.

I get ready, go to the car, get sms, 'I will be going with the girls, to the center, maybe we meet next time'.

what is that????

I'd say its a sign she's getting westernized ..................hehehee

John

Posted by: Jutman

thx for the comments. I like it to.

I don't knw in Uk and USA how it works, but here we have public language schools, and in a community serving 80000, there is more than 300 students from more than 50 countries. So most of her friends are from around the world.

Like UK, Estonia, Ecuador, Ghana and Bulgaria, but she has contact with germans, swiss, belgiums, spanish, from guatemala, turkey, pakista, afganistan, China Indonesia and philifinnes.

Posted by: FrancoPUA

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jutman

That is a LACK OF RESPECT. Something you should never accept from a woman if you still want to be her MAN.

This is also a test to see how much she can get her way with you without consequences..

Posted by: Jutman

Franco

I hope you were teasing me. No, its fine and here in Easter she will have her girls-eve, so I will be listen to 7 girls chittin away. ;-)

Posted by: firemansam

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jutman

I really hope I am wrong.....
My last "local" girlfriend (a whie ago now) and we only saw each other on weekends, ie, FRI/SAT/SUN.
Then I would get messages saying "can't do friday......."
"Not available sunday"......
Then I get the "sorry but, we don't see each other enough....."
I really hope I am wrong...
Hope to see a more happy post from your first!
Sam.

Posted by: RoninRWP

Jutman,

I don't know your full story so I'm basing my comments strickly from your posts on this thread and your bewilderment of the situation.

Franco is right. She is testing the envelope of your authority as a husband and decision maker of the family. If you do nothing and present her with no consequences then the slide toward dis-respect begins. When respect is lost so will love go in the same breath.

When I speak of consequences, I'm not speaking of ultimatums or restrictions. I'm talking about communicating to her how such actions are unaceptable. You must portray being upset and argue the point over and over. Paraphrase every which way and more until she understands or becomes silent. This is not brow beating her. This is the manner to which love for a relationship is hammered out. This is something that she will understand and love you for.

RoninRWP

Posted by: Jutman

Hi

No no. It was a 'joke'. am very happy that she can do things on her own. Actually I like that I don't have to go to the center (mol), instead the girls can chit chat all that they want.

Posted by: Ade

Hi Jutman,

I'm a little surprised at the comments you've received....to me, as I posted at the start of this thread, it looked a very good sign that she is settling in and finding her feet in her new country.

It's more than a little odd that it gets so easily misread and construed as a lack of consideration. Good for her, and good for you,

Ade

Posted by: firemansam

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ade

Hi Jutman,

I'm a little surprised at the comments you've received....to me, as I posted at the start of this thread, it looked a very good sign that she is settling in and finding her feet in her new country.

It's more than a little odd that it gets so easily misread and construed as a lack of consideration. Good for her, and good for you,

Ade

Hi Ade, have to say in hind sight, I may have been wel off the point of this post. Looking back now, compared to my original post, I see that maybe it is more of a fitting into her new world. At least I hope it is

Sam.