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Posted by: searcher

Hello everyone, I am new here.

The more I read, the more questions I have so here is the first one:

If you were to go to dinner at a ladies parents home I assume that for this occasion you would wear a suit or some other nice clothes.

If you're wearing a suit would it be impropper to remove your suit coat upon arriving or is it expected that you will remain "dressed" / "dressed up" at all times?

Also, if you are a person who drinks little or no alcohol what excuses did/do you use to limit the amount you drank?

If the lady of your interest has a child in their teens, what kinds of gifts would you consider getting them? What are teens in the FSU interested in?

What other things should one avoid while visiting a ladies parents? What things are inappropriate at the table or in the home in general? (I know to take off my shoes upon arriving)

Thanks,
Mark

Posted by: Woody

Searcher, one answer all of the questions you ask would be to do what you feel comfortable with:

Wear something smart and comfortable
With your jacket take it off if it is more comfortable
With drink pace yourself, accept a small glass, refuse a top up or just drink something else. If you don't drink then tell your host.
Gifts for teenagers? That's a difficult one. Perhaps a look around you, in your home town, might give you some ideas.
And what things should you avoid? Mmmm, being impolite.

On the whole be yourself and all will be ok.
This is a start. I'm sure others have ideas that could assist.

Clive

Posted by: ShermanAtlanta

To be honest, I didn't do any of the things that I was supposed to do with the exception of giving the right amount of flowers to all of the females in the family. I had an interpreter with me most of the time and she explained to everyone American customs. I didn't remove my shoes and she explained to them our customs. They were not offended at all. The asked a lot of questions about our customs and lifestyle and they were amazed at some of my answers. I tried to be myself as much as possible. I didn't eat some of the foods and politely refused some drinks. Kvas especially. My interpreter always explained and we all laughed. As long as there is good communication no one will be offended. I had a wonderful escort that spoke near perfect English so we always had a good time. If anyone is ever going to Kherson I will give you her name and number. By the way, Lena's mom was amazed that we drink water from the faucet. It is little things like this that make good conversations. But most of all I told them that there cities are a lot like ours. I think that with the exception of a few customs we are mostly the same.
Sherman

Posted by: andrei

Dont overlook my advice too since Im native Russian and I know some things.

Never mind what you're wearing, just make sure it's tidy & clean. Many Russian women notice that some of their foreign friends look untidy all the way through, so pay attention to it. Take off your jacket when you want, dont even pay a single second of your time to that.

Alcohol: when everybody fills up their glasses, say "Dont fill mine, I dont drink today" and nobody will be offended. Otherwise, if your cup is already filled, drink it up or you will look disrespectful towards others.

If I'd be a teen of today I'd love me a MP3 player or a pair of roller skates or a nice backpack, that'd be fine.

There are two things that are totally unappropriate in Russia, but Im pretty sure you wont yourself do that: the first is not to "burp" (sorry I dont know any other word for that) and the second is never "cut the cheese" in public (I know English-speaking people dont do that but some Germans do, thats why Im mentioning it, sorry again).

Any other things - just do what you want. Some people here dont like when you're whistling or pointing a finger at something, but thats personal issues. Just feel free.

Sorry for the above mentioned awful things, but I've seen some foreigners "perform" that, so I had to make sure you won't.

Peace.

Posted by: ShermanAtlanta

Hey, Andrei is being politically correct! I thought that was an American behavior.
Sherman

Posted by: andrei

Quote:

Originally posted by ShermanAtlanta
Hey, Andrei is being politically correct! I thought that was an American behavior.
Sherman

I try to be as correct as possible, and still "kick the truth to the foreign youth".

Seriously, most of y'all are just older than me, so I cant just say offending things and kick back. I gotta make sure Im not misunderstood.

Posted by: pharmrep2

Yeah andrei is right about the whistling, my wife didnt like when I whistled at her, I got a scolding, she said it was a superstition that if someone whistles there will be no money.

Posted by: andrei

Quote:

Originally posted by pharmrep2
Yeah andrei is right about the whistling, my wife didnt like when I whistled at her, I got a scolding, she said it was a superstition that if someone whistles there will be no money.

I know its your wife and all, but if somebody else tries to stop you from harmonizing with your lips, say get out with your superstitions. It's 21st century, what are they talking about!

Posted by: Dennis/Natasha

Natasha says not to whistle too... for the same reasons. So I whistle and say. "Good it will keep me from being to lazy in life."

I think it is for mostly not allowed inside someones home though... It is like cursing them from what I understand.

Posted by: searcher

Thanks everyone,

Andrei,
Its kinda comical that anyone would do those things without thinking (or at least asking themselves if it might possibly be offending) but people do all kinds of things I guess....