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romance tours
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Posted by: SMc

Posted by: Khashyar

Hi Sean...

You bring up the subject about romance tours that many men have thought about and may be considering...

I think that, typically, at the "socials" of these tours, there are far greater numbers of women than men (some men understandably enjoy this). Alternatively, I think that for many of the women, they feel uncomfortable and feel that they have to "perform" for the men in order to attract the right man's attention...

Perhaps this kind of setting will allow the more social men and women shine, while those who don't like this kind of social pressure may have a harder time communicating and authentically expressing themselves.

Also... From my experience and perspective, it really does require time to get to know who another person is (especially if you are from two different cultures and speak two different languages), so if you do meet a woman on a social tour, expect to spend at least several months after your initial meeting emailing and calling by phone regularly so that you both can REALLY get to know each other.

The advantage of meeting someone by email or through a personals first, is that you can review profiles and narrow your search based upon if you and another person have similar profiles and interests, and then you can communicate and meet in person and get to know each other in that way.

I think that if you try to choose someone in a "social," it is similar to a club scene where two people are really focusing more on outer appearances, and it is more difficult to focus on who a person is on the inside. However, for some men (and women), it probably is a fun way to meet people.

Do "romance tours" increase or decrease your chances of finding someone to begin a serious and successful relationship with? Maybe others can share their experiences with this.

My personal style is to get to know as much about a person (or a selection of people) first, and then carefully choose who I think is the best choice for me (and who I can potentially spend the rest of my life with). If I were to choose who to possibly begin a relationship with by meeting them in person for the first time and only spending a few days with them, then I feel that I would tend to act upon and respond to more to who I am most attracted to physically (with also a smaller degree of awareness and understanding of who's peronality I am drawn to and appeals to me).

I would personally rather "meet" someone's personality first (with probably having an initial confirmation that I find them attractive-- through a photo or a brief meeting), and then, after I feel that our characters and personalities match, spend physical time with them and develop the fun and more involved aspect of a physical relationship.

This is actually easier said that done sometimes

And, ideally, you can probably best get to know someone if you live in the same city as they do.

I happy that I am married, but if I were single, and were able to, I would live in Russia (and perhaps teach English), get to know the culture, and slowly develop a relationship with a woman based upon how we respond to each other over time.

It would be good to hear other's perspective about this also.

Khashyar