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hi folks
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Posted by: andrei

just popped in to see what's going on among foreigners interested in my country

seems like you have a lot to talk about

if any of you will need an advice or info on our country, our women, or else, just get at me, i'll be visiting this forum now n then just to see how's it going on... pretty sure i could tell y'all about everything except those visa things...

anyway, holler if you'll need anything... i won't hesitate to answer, prolly a word or two from a Russian guy will help some of you

peace

Posted by: Khashyar

Hi Andrei...

Welcome to the Russian Meeting Place forums...

I look forward to receiving a Russian's (and a Russian man's) perceptions on all of these topics that we have been writing about.

As you may know, this forum is a place where we can freely and respectfully share any and all of our thoughts and perceptions, as well as respect other's views.....

I welcome your thoughts as a Russian....

I think that many men would love to hear your thoughts about Russian women.

Why do you believe that they are wanting to marry men outside of their country? What does the average Russian feel about the fact that Russian women are wanting to marry non-Russians?

I (and I'm sure others) would love to hear your thoughts about these and other issues....

Khashyar

Posted by: Jim_FL

Hey Andrei !

I browsed through some of the comments you've posted today, I like you already

Haven't found anything to disagree with yet, from you taste in music to your views on China

Posted by: andrei

2Khashyar: A Russian woman turns abroad when she feels that she isn't able to find a strong man in her own country. The reason for it is either one or several unsuccessful marriages or a strong belief that 'all men are the same'.

Usually a woman lives such a harsh life (like ANY other person here) that her only dream is to finally find a man that will buy her a car, take her to a trip to the sea, send her flowers and take care of her babies. Usually an average Russian spends so much time tryin' to make money he just has no tenderness, no love words, no champagne & caviar, and no heart feelings towards his wife. Around 30-35 years old, if a man didnt manage to develop his career, he starts to drink, thats when the family splits. Children are usually left with their Moms, it's just traditional.

Young women watch this situation and think that they wont be able to reach other heights either, so, they start looking abroad at a young age. They think that life in USA is like a fairytale, because they only see it in films & movies (pretty cheap films, by the way)))).

For me personally, it's absolutely NO problem. Y'all can take as many women as you all like, we still got MILLIONS of Queens left. All my girlfriens thruout ALL my life were more beatiful & good looking than, say, Denise Richards or Tyra Banks. All slim and intelligent. And I didnt even give much attempt in gettin' with them, they just hang around.

An average Russian actually doesn't give a damn, but, if he hears that a friend of his went abroad with a non-Russian, the only question is, "why? aren't there enuf men around here or what?" No disrespect or frustration, only wondering.

Thats all.

Posted by: andrei

Quote:

Originally posted by Emetsky
ЗдрАвствуйте Andrei!! Как поживаешь? Надеюсь, ты себя хорошо чувствуешь.

Конечно хорошо!!! )))) Я молод и здоров, и тебе того же желаю. У тебя хороший русский, продолжай в том же духе!!!

Note: Next time, if you start a phrase with "здравствуйте", you'll have to continue like "Как поживаеТЕ? Надеюсь, ВЫ себя хорошо чувствуеТЕ?" Or, start the phrase with "здравствуй" with no "te". But I'm too young for all that "ВЫ", so dont mind that. Good looking out!

Posted by: OlenkaKyiv

Quote:

Originally posted by andrei
2Khashyar: A Russian woman turns abroad when she feels that she isn't able to find a strong man in her own country.

Sorry, did you talk about strong men in Russia??? Are there lots of them?? And what is this "Russian strong man"?? I have no idea maybe only from some examples which must have government protection and put them to "red book" or they will disappear.

Quote:

Usually a woman lives such a harsh life (like ANY other person here) that her only dream is to finally find a man that will buy her a car, take her to a trip to the sea, send her flowers and take care of her babies. Usually an average Russian spends so much time tryin' to make money he just has no tenderness, no love words, no champagne & caviar, and no heart feelings towards his wife.

Sorry, and what dreams Russian men has

? To wear nothing? to walk to work every day by own legs to get work and spend 2 hours to get there? To eat boiled sausage with toilet paper only because it is cheap?? To drink medical alcohol with water? Not to work and lay on the couch reading newspaper and whatching TV crying on his wife that it is dirty at home and nothing to eat at home??? Does Russian man ever think of ways from where food is

? Does he ever care that she works, she takes care of him, of children???
Russian women want Cavier???!!! Shampagne???!!! She wants normal womens' life for her family, but not for herself. She doesn't want hear "dirty words" (maty) from men. She needs an attention. Do you want to tell that woman doesn't work and only Russian supermen work hard

Quote:

Around 30-35 years old, if a man didnt manage to develop his career, he starts to drink, thats when the family splits.

hmmmm..... you said opposite things. What strong man will start to drink??? is he strong?? Come on what a rubbish.

Quote:

They think that life in USA is like a fairytale, because they only see it in films & movies (pretty cheap films, by the way)))).

They don't think so, but better to have the smae difficulties with man who is able to give "tenderness, love words, heart feelings towards his wife."!!!

Quote:

For me personally, it's absolutely NO problem. Y'all can take as many women as you all like, we still got MILLIONS of Queens left.

If Russian men are like they are right now and if Russian women will be smarter, beware, they can leave also.

In me you can find a lady who has not so good thought about Russian men. When I met American man first time, I was shoked because of his attention and how he took care about me even we had a deal because of work only. I was nobody for him. I never had such treatment from Russian men, even from the best friends. I thought: "ok.... probably he was not like others" But not..... Because of my work I have a deal with others from different countries, but again I have proofs that they are more polite. I am happy that my Lovely is not like Russian men and I dont care about all hardships, because I know that in difficult minute he won't go to PUB to drink vodka, like "GREAT STRONG RUSSIAN MEN" do and.... and.... and... I could tell even more. But enough

Olenka

Posted by: Lena

Hello, Everyone!

Olenka, THANK YOU very much for your sincere opinions (which I agree are accurate). I completely agree with you. I feel that everything you wrote is a reality in Russian life.

Of course, I do not want to speak badly about all Russian men, but if everything was so great in relationships in Russia, then virtually no Russian woman would move thousands of miles away to mary a foreign person and begin a new life abroad. It’s not so easy to be far from your family, friends and our culture. Here (I mean in another country) we need to begin life from “zero”-- language, education, friends, our careers and so on.

I do not know, but during my work with the Photo Personals part of our website, I can tell you that most of all, women are looking for confidence in the next day, in their future. What kind of cars, houses and diamonds that they will receive from a foreign husband are not a significant desire for them. I can tell you that there are some exceptions and that some Russian women are looking for a rich life, but perhaps this encompasses 10%-15% of the women seeking relationships abroad, while the remaining 85% of Russian women just want to be HAPPY.

Andrei, I can tell you exactly, and my husband will confirm this fact, that I didn’t know about what kind of car I would have, how many floors were in his house, and other material details of my future life in America. It’s not important for the majority of Russian women.

Why do we run away from our country? I can give you the answer from the point of view of a Russian woman-- My answer is that we are seeking to love, to be loved and to not have the stresses from a drunk boyfriend or husband, and to have a happy family and healthy children.

To be honest, I was afraid to build a family with any of my ex- Russian boyfriends. Perhaps I have not been lucky to find the right man for me in my motherland. Again, I do not want to speak badly about all Russian men.

A large number of my friends who live in Russian and Belarus are divorced and are alone with their child. WHY? Do we divorce just because we do not have 3 floors in our house, or 5-10-20 diamonds, or BMW or Ferrari

?????? I am not a big expert in cars,

Is this a reason?????? The answer is no, no and no……

In regards to Denise Richards, Tyra Banks, Julia Roberts, Madonna

I think that all Russian women are very beautiful and care about their appearance, so it’s not a big problem to find a very attractive woman because for every 3 to 4 women in Russia, there is one man, especially in smaller cities. To find a woman like Denise Richards or Tyra Banks is not a big problem, but the problem is how you respect her after 2-3 years of your relationship or marriage. Where are all the positive feelings and actions that were abundant in the first months of dating????? Everything is so beautiful at first, but after a period of time, the most important things in many men's lives becomes their friends, bars, vodka, other girls and so on. I tell you this because this is what I experienced in 6 years of my communicating with my first Russian boyfriend. I am sincere in what I write about my experience with Russian men and alcohol, irresponsibility, and incompatibility.

It doesn’t matter whether you are like Julia Roberts or Denise Richards with a good appearance and body, the time will come (especially after they bear a child), that Russian men will find 18 year-old girls with young and attractive bodies. One of the several examples of this that I am aware of is in the life of one of my good friends: when his father had 2 children and a wonderful wife, the father left the family and found a 20 year-old girl just because he wanted a change in his life.

Andrei and all Russian men who will read this post, I repeat that I am not saying that all Russian men have these negative qualitites. I am hoping that you are a very good person and will respect and love your wife and children, and will value your family. We are speaking in general to present and communicate about a realistic picture. There are not a lot of “strong men” in Russian, Ukraine, and Belarus. You can agree with me, or not, but this my opinion based upon my own experience.

Lena

Posted by: Keith

Quote:

Originally posted by Lena

Why do we run away from our country? I can give you the answer from the point of view of a Russian woman-- My answer is that we are seeking to love, to be loved and to not have the stresses from a drunk boyfriend or husband, and to have a happy family and healthy children.

Well said Lena!

Keith

Posted by: andrei

Come on ladies, when I was talking about houses and cars I put it as an example of security in relationships. A man that doesnt drink and waists no time on prostitutes will surely be able to deal with material things.

I'm sorry that my short message raised so much frustration in your hearts. From my point of view, Lena was totally right in almost everything, except that you can't find a decent man in Russia. If someone didnt manage to, it doesnt mean that everyone will fail. Maybe spending 6 years with the wrong man just wasn't the right thing.

As for Olenka, I think you was just too frustrated after reading my message. "What strong Russian men are you talking about", c'mon lady, that's isn't even funny. If we were all weak Russia would turn into ruins, sooner or later. Neither me or my friends drink that much vodka and we never beat our girlfriends, and it doesnt seem like we're the last of a dying breed. I dont know what's gonna happen in the future, when our girlfriends & wives will get pregnant for the first time, but as for now, everything's peaches & cream.

I agree 90% with Lena (though no, not every Russian woman will leave, believe me ))))))), but Olenka..... well, as I've said previously, she's sure that 'all men are the same'.... Well alright, if 70 million men are the same, I guess we're all clones of each other.

peace

Posted by: Khashyar

Hi Andrei...

Of course there are good men in Russia

I appreciate hearing respectful perspectives from both Russian men and Russian women....

I think that we can all learn from this type of dialogue...

Khashyar

Posted by: andrei

Quote:

Originally posted by Khashyar
Hi Andrei...

I think that we can all learn from this type of dialogue...

Khashyar

Now THAT'S what I call positive thinking...

Posted by: Khashyar

One of the things that I (and others) feel is unique and interesting about this forum is that it is a rich place because many different kinds of people are encouraged, welcome and free to participate here...

Khashyar

Posted by: Emetsky

In my opinion, Russian women who seek foreign men seek security first and all the rest later.

I base this opinion on my own personal experiences with Russian women.

Anyway, I told this to one of my Russian lady co-workers and she said it's pretty much the same over here (in her opinion).

Posted by: Emetsky

Aloh Olenka. 'just thought you'd be interested in reading this article.

http://www.themoscowtimes.com/stori.../07/08/014.html

I personally know some Russian women here in the States who came here thinking that everything would be perfect with their American husbands only to discover that they were very wrong.

Please don't let me discourage you though. I'm sure you will be happy

Posted by: OlenkaKyiv

oops.... It happened as always.... my post wasn't understand as a general post. Probably it is because I didn't say: "I don't mean that every Russian man is so bad, I am talking in general". OK.... now I told this! There are good men in Russia - yes, there are bad women in Russia - yes, the same is in US or other countries. I have met not so kind and polite foreigners with whom I should fight (please don't think that it was in reality, I mean in words) for good understanding and respectful treatment.
I SAID in general! Sorry for being too emotional. I know this is my BIG problem and I am always beaten for this on every Forum, but I don't mean that I was beaten to the death (again I don't mean the real death

), because every person has own frame of mind and he could find common or different opinions of others.... actually for this reason Forums exist.

Quote:

Andrei wrote
but Olenka..... well, as I've said previously, she's sure that 'all men are the same'.... Well alright, if 70 million men are the same, I guess we're all clones of each other.

And not - not all men are the same, actually everyone is unique and different, but culture and circumstances have an influence on people. Living in bad circumstances makes a person alike to others. Unfortunately.
And please, don't be afraid about being a clon

because every man is given life by woman. Good that Russian men have Russian Queens you talked about

So tell thanks to Russian Queens that even they are treated badly SOMETIMES FROM SOME MEN (I talk in general) still love their Russian men and want to live with them, and take care for them, keeping them really strong

and saving them from being clon.

I am not that lady who found strong man here among a million of men (maybe more) in Kiev. Sometimes I think that I am too strong so probabaly it is a reason why I didn't find ENOUGH strong man here. Everyone has own life and fortune.

Emotional as always Olenka

Posted by: OlenkaKyiv

Quote:

Originally posted by Emetsky
Aloh Olenka. 'just thought you'd be interested in reading this article.

http://www.themoscowtimes.com/stori.../07/08/014.html

oh.... thanks.... I have read this story a year ago. It is life. The same you can see in Russian families. Every night my neighbor beats his wife and so hard that my walls tremble. So you never know in what troubles you can get in and where it can happen: in Russia or another country.... it is fortune.

I am afraid that among those numbers of ladies who was abused there are some of them who provoke their husbands to be beaten, then to get divorce and their GC, because divorce in this case give her a right to get her GC and not to leave US. It is sad to tell such things, but it happens. So it shows that not every Russian woman is the QUEEN also.

Quote:

I personally know some Russian women here in the States who came here thinking that everything would be perfect with their American husbands only to discover that they were very wrong.

And as we are talking in GENERAL, lets don't forget about PERSON's life also, because people's life is great number of lives and fortunes. One lady has good life in Russian, but another bad one. These ladies who thought of "sweet life" with their foreign husbands could have the same thoughts of Russian life, and they could get the same in Russia. That is life.

Olenka

Posted by: andrei

Quote:

Originally posted by OlenkaKyiv
I am not that lady who found strong man here among a million of men (maybe more) in Kiev. Sometimes I think that I am too strong so probabaly it is a reason why I didn't find ENOUGH strong man here. Everyone has own life and fortune.

Well, this one smells truth. I know a WHOLE lot of young ladies that are alone because any guy she meets turns out to be weaker than her. My former girl's sister suffers the same thang. She calls me now & then asking what can she do to this. I reply like 'keep looking and dont lose your self-consciousness'. I gotta put it down, a lot of Russian guys are much weaker than their spouses.

For me, if it seems like the girl I'm tryin' to get at is way stronger than me, I just step away. Or try to get in bed with her ASAP and then step away.

peace

Posted by: Keith

Let's be fair...there ARE American women who find Russian husbands and live in Russia. In the book "Wedded Strangers," the author cites many (maybe too many) such relationships.

Keith

Posted by: andrei

Mr. Keith asked me who I am and what I do and how I found RMP. Well, here I go.

I was born on Halloween 1978 here in Omsk (you can take a few minutes to find it - halfway from Moscow to Beijing, also halfway from Aral Sea to the Arctic Ocean. In 2001 I was certified a Dentist, and just a few days ago - a Prosthodontist. Also looking forward to getting a degree in Implantology. Right now I'm on vacation and I ain't got anything to do, except that in a week I'm going on a trip to Moscow for a coupla weeks, just to see my Uncle and my former girlfriend (hoping to hook back up and snatch some plums from that tree

. My major hobbies are

hip hop music (sorry middle class Americans but that's where I learned my English from)

backgammon (can beat anyone my age)

billiards (just starting with this)

also carting (sometimes)

skating (I was a figure skater in my childhood)

and I also performed 2 parachute jumps (broke my leg on the 2nd one).

Recently I found myself hugely interested in communicating with foreigners. I dont know why, but I have something like THIRST for talking with foreigners about my country. Every forteigner that happens to arrive here looka totally disorientated, and everyone around seems eager to help him, but nobody knows the language well enough. so I happen to be the only one to talk about my city and Russian culture with them.

So lately I just went to AltaVista and typed smth like Russians Meet Foreigners and popped in here.

Hope it's for long.

peace

P/S/ The reason why I used profanity is because we young Russian cuss like EVERY minute in our everyday speech (between each other, of course), so it's sometimes hard to notice a bad word come out of my keyboard. I'll try to stay polite tho.

Posted by: Keith

Andrei:

You're certainly entertaining. You're probably one of those dentist that talk to patients with there are numerous hands in your their mouth.

I understand your English a little better now if hip-hop music has been your inspiration! I don't care for the music but to each his own.

I'm not your age but I can play a little backgammon myself...maybe you'll go easy on me.

I see we also share a fondness for jumping out of perfectly good airplanes! I did one time too many and ruined a promising flying career...oh, one of those pits of life. I didn't break a leg but did get a permanent bum knee.

I look forward to reading your postings about your culture, etc. One question especially for you...is there a big difference in European Russia and Asian Russia? That's one vast country you live in!

Keith

Posted by: andrei

Quote:

Originally posted by Keith
Andrei:

I look forward to reading your postings about your culture, etc. One question especially for you...is there a big difference in European Russia and Asian Russia? That's one vast country you live in!

Keith

I'd divide my country into four parts:

1. Major European cities:
Moscow, Sankt Peterburg, Nizhni Novgorod, Yekaterinburg

The richest people, the most civilized life, a lot of sightseeings, lots of career opportunities.

2. Siberia & the Far East:
The economics is based on nature resources, all people are somehow involved in oil, gas or machinery industry. The biggest salaries, the coldest winters, the worst health, and ATTENTION! the best Russian spoken (no dialects).

3. European part excluding those four cities:
The economics is based on agriculture. Russians are a fair majority, the salaries are poor, the cities are small, and the Russian divides into 4-6 dialects.

4. Caucasus
Russians are a minority, Caucasians live their own life. Crime and local wars are a part of everyday life.

I guess yes, European and Asian Russia are not the same. I'm proud of being a Siberian tho. At least I talk a good language and am able to survive a -40 centigrade frost!

Posted by: OlenkaKyiv

Quote:

Originally posted by andrei
Well, this one smells truth. I know a WHOLE lot of young ladies that are alone because any guy she meets turns out to be weaker than her. My former girl's sister suffers the same thang. She calls me now & then asking what can she do to this. I reply like 'keep looking and dont lose your self-consciousness'. I gotta put it down, a lot of Russian guys are much weaker than their spouses.

For me, if it seems like the girl I'm tryin' to get at is way stronger than me, I just step away. Or try to get in bed with her ASAP and then step away.

peace

well..... strong Olenka as a rule steps away from Dentists

Olenka

P.S. additional question to your biogrphy - where did you study English?

Posted by: andrei

In a special school with deeper learning of English (shkola s angliyskim uklonom). They used to bring foreigners now & then and we used to ask them stupid questions, not understanding half of what they talked about. But around the 9th grade I started watching American films without dubbing and got deep into hip hop, and suddenly I started to understand fluent English speech. When Internet appeared in my city, I was already good enough to communicate in English.

Speaking English fluently is a big honour here. Guys raise eyebrows and girls give out their phone numbers.

Posted by: Keith

Olenka:

Maybe this sounds a little too academic but communication consists of at least two parts...the message being sent (or the message intended) and...the message being received (how the message was understood). Failure to communicate is not always the fault of the sender. It can be a combination of the two to varying degrees. I understood what you were saying but someone else did not...it's okay and don't beat yourself up for this. This is not to say the person receiving the message was wrong...there simply was miscommunication. Do not let misunderstandings spoil your passion and effort to communicate your feelings.

Keith

Posted by: Keith

Quote:

Originally posted by Emetsky
Aloh Olenka. 'just thought you'd be interested in reading this article.

http://www.themoscowtimes.com/stori.../07/08/014.html

I read this article and checked to see if any legislation had been introduced and I could not find any but I didn't spend lots of time looking.

(ranting on) This is a typcial knee-jerk political reaction by a politician responding to an isolated incident. I hardly think this has reached epidemic proportions but if it has then maybe something should be done. This is yet another piece of bureaucratic red tape that will delay the processing of visa applications for the other 99.9% of those seeking to be with loved ones. (ranting off)

Keith

Posted by: andrei

Quote:

Originally posted by sean mcgann

Andre you write English really well,I wonder

Just trying to stay up to date ...