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English (British) culture versus Russian culture (differences between Russians and the English)
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Posted by: Khashyar

[The first three posts were split from another thread and made into this new topic]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Luckylass...

How do you think that Russians think differently from the English?

Are there three differences that you could pinpoint and articulate?

Khashyar

Posted by: luckylass

wow Khashyar, I was just thinking that you must be an early riser like me today when I realised you are on LA time frame lol.......I know you have been away I hope you both had a great time want to share any experiences?

Well firstly I noticed that Russian hospitality is second to none even if they have very little to share it will be offered. I am not saying we do not aspire to this in the UK but it is more obvious to me with Russian people around.

Also if i require any assistance regards anything I have only to ask and there will be genuine volunteers and nothing is expected in return (although it is given) in vodka lol...............My British friends here will assist if asked to but it is remembered and is sort of a brownie point in store for them later and mentioned occasionally to remind you which i find a little irritating. Also if you assist a Russian person with anything (such as I translate English documents when asked) this will be repaid with lunch/dinner a night out ect which I never ask for.

I enjoy the openness of Russian people once you get to know them they are definitely easy to get along with. They do not appear to be so ruffled by the small stuff in life, they just get on with it and find a way around whatever it is. You can enjoy any discussion heated or otherwise with both parties saying what they think then shake hands or round it off with a tot of vodka to show no hard feeling whatever the differences of opinion. In the UK people defend there opinion to the hilt and I find that when people say they do not mind agreeing to differ they usually resent it somewhere down the road and it comes up in other ways. To be really honest here the Cypriots are really bad for smiling to your face and stabbing you in the back later especially to my Russian girlfriends as the Cypriot women despite being attractive themselves are very jealous of Russian women.

Now some of the misunderstandings I have with my russian friends are that they can be very single minded and it appears very selfish sometimes, especially to a brit when we have been brought up to be there for everyone else most of the time. What they feel is acceptable to say and do can sound like I am just thinking of me right now and what I need to do so you must accept that whatever your feelings on the subject. This is one of those occasions when I want to say look here I was there for you when you really needed somebody where are you for me now! ( by this I mean more emotionaly) but they seem to have the capacity for closing everything down until problem solved and I feel like saying I am sorry it is an inconvenient time for you but.........Again I have spoken to my friends re this subject and AARRGGGGGGG I admit to feeling cut off and dumped but realise that is is just there way at times. It does bother me as at those times I feel rejected but also wish to offer my services in return as a friend during those difficult times for them as they did for me. My question to them is WHY? Because other people are there for them too. This is where I believe stubbornness comes into play as you almost feel your help and assistance is worthless to them or god forbid you may be interfering where you are not wanted, when all you are trying to do is help.

It reminds me of the women are from Venus and the men are from mars with the Russians being from mars LOL.................This is why I think most of my other friends who are amazed by my friendships with Russian people think I am a little crazy as they often talk about Russian selfishness ect ect when I try to understand it rather than walk away because I am not prepared to loose good friendships for the sake of what could be termed as a nationality trait. On the opposite side of the coin they too try to understand me and my ways but say I am too wrapped up thinking and doing for other people when I should spend more time on what I want to do and who I want to be with and maybe this is just a brit trait. One thing for sure they do laugh at me for it...

Look at me babbling on yet again you probably did not want a thesis but well you asked.................

I have just noticed that you wanted to start a new thread that would be great but I have responded to your questions here and presume you will just move it? I would also be interested in the diffrences in the USA ways too and Russians because I have lived in the US for a little while and got used to the people there too and that is another story LOL.........

:britain

Posted by: Khashyar

Hi Luckylass,

I think that your comments and comparisons are very interesting.

In fact, I think that it would be the most helpful to others if we created a new thread about Russian and English cultures. If you don't mind, I would like to do that.

I also love and appreciate the friendliness and giving nature of the Russian people who consider you a friend, or who have welcomed you into their home. And I also feel that Russians really mean it when they embrace you as a friend. Friendships in the American culture can be easy to dissolve.

Thanks again for expressing your thoughts and experiences for others to benefit from.

Khashyar

Posted by: luckylass

I found it very interesting the comment you made about fickle friendships in the US that can dissolve easily. Could you expand on that as when I visited the US I found that for the most part American people were full of rah about there own customs, cultures, and values but when it came down to the nitty gritty or being enquiring enough to understand another’s culture it appeared to be too much like hard work especially if they had to do something above and beyond what was considered by them as the norm way of life there. I watched in amazement how everyone aspires to this typical what they see as American family and life in general. I saw that they were afraid to be involved in anything else in case they somehow were affected by whatever it was and it took them away from the norm dream if that makes sense? By comparison when I visited the US re a case I was working on I found that the homeless and shall we say challenged people in life over there that I had to deal with were the most helpful and courteous. Maybe this was because they stuck together with one another through there problems and challenges? From what some of my Russian friends explain to me regards Russia and living through some of the most difficult times in there home countries is what brings them values about friendships and loyalty because they know what that is all about. I don’t really believe that most Americans have experienced this and maybe that’s why they live superficially and always with a dream? To give you an example regards this I spoke to one of my US friends to express my sympathy when 9/11 struck and his comment back to me was " how dare they do this to gods country and its people they will know the might and power now that is America when we retaliate" I gently pointed out to him that all peoples have had there share of terror as we in Britain have for a long time dealt with the IRA ect and his response was " but they can and will not be allowed to do it here" This person is a scientist and very intelligent so you can be sure I was shocked by his response in that manner. I am not decrying the US here at all I loved parts of the country and did meet some very interesting people on all my trips there but I did also notice some of the situations mentioned above. it will be very interesting to hear a Russians point of view living in the US.