First Experience -Please Help - Russian Ukrainian Belarus Travel Music Woman Dating News

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First Experience -Please Help
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Posted by: shakey

I joined an American online dating service (match.com) and due to the fact that I am divorced and have little exposure to single woman in my work. I put a profile up with picture ,honest information and foreign relationships were never my goal. Within a rather short time I have been contacted by many different types of woman mostly older, a few my age and some much younger. I felt that some of the the younger women were running some sort of scam and felt strong enough to let it end by dropping contact.
One that I have corresponded with claims to be from Murom. She caught me online by IMing me and asking me to write her directly. She claimed to have like my profile and said she would provide a photo if I wrote. I wrote to this person and received a letter back with a good bit of broken English describing a charming woman and attached were two photo's and of course they were of a very attractive 28 year old. I am 47 and just average looking so culturally this seemed pretty strange. I have received three letters and responded to two of them. I did a search and read up on the subject of relationships with Russian woman and scams. It seems that there are plenty of relationships in which are sincere and many which are scams. I don't know how to tell. The part that worries me is the frequency is rapid and two rather long letters each contained two photos . I traced the ip and found it came from one place then to Moscow and then on from there. The letter are charming and although the English is rough. The really suspicious parts are that she claims I am her first internet friend. I also have a hard time that she lists Michael Jackson as one of the acts she likes. Is it possible that someone could be that out of touch in the Russia of today? Now she wants more details of my life. Can anyone tell me if I am wasting my time or corresponding with a sincere charming slightly naive lady?

Thanks
Steve

Posted by: povlhp

Match.com is scammers paradise. And she is 20 years younger than you, so it is unlikely that she is real.

But hang in, usually it will not take many letters before she asks you for money. Tehn you know it is Fat Yuri you are writing.

Posted by: Khashyar

Hi shakey,

Welcome to the Russian Meeting Place forums.

There are many resources and threads in this forum and website where you will find a wealth of information about Russian-Western relationships....

Just spend some time, do a lot of reading, and you will receive great information.

Good luck,

Khashyar

P.S... there IS life after a divorce...

Posted by: Jason

It doesn't necessarily sound like a scam to me. Several women in Russia have told me that once a woman is over 25, she will have a very hard time finding a Russian man to marry. This woman lives in a small town so maybe she has not had success finding a man and decided to try men from other countries.

As for the fact that she wrote to you quickly and sent photos I don't see that as being indicative of a scam. It seems like a good thing to me.

And the fact that she likes Michael Jackson...how is that a scam? He is much bigger in other parts of the world than in America. Different bands are popular in Russia. The Scorpions played Omsk when I was there and it was a huge event. Last summer I met a 21 year old model who lives about five hours outside Moscow and her favorite artist was George Michael!

Write to her for a while and see what happens. Just don't send any money.

Posted by: Khashyar

There are two approaches that you can take to help make her intentions more clear....

1) to continue to email with her regularly, and observe her email thoughts and behavior (and of course, NEVER send anyone money who you have not met in person).

or 2) accelerate the process a bit by calling her on the phone and getting a sense of her by phone. Calling Russia is less than 10 cents per minute, and I think that it is a good way to get a better sense of someone. (And then continue with the emails)...

But, in any event, it takes time to get to know someone, especially over a long distance. So be patient, and understand that it will take a lot of communicating and open discussions to learn what her character is really like, and whether she might be compatible with you.

Good luck,

Khashyar

Posted by: searcher

Quote:

Originally posted by Jason
The Scorpions played Omsk when I was there and it was a huge event.

Really! They were popular when I was in high school.

I know Michael jackson is quite popular there and in many other parts of Europe.

So, sorry for the off topic... but how did you like Omsk?

I enjoyed it quite a bit when I was there!

I want to return during a summer.

Posted by: shakey

Yes She Wrote

" As for foreign
variety performers I love Scorpions, Bon Jovi, Eminem, Michael Jacson,
Natalia Oreiro and etc. By and large I am fond of listening to classic and modern style music. I want to learn which music do you like? "

I really appreciate all that took the time to respond. Its very interesting and I think that it sounds like investing too much emotionally would be a mistake.

Scam or not I am truly happy I have learned so much from reading this site. It makes me want to travel to FSU. Also interestingly enough that is where my family came from 4 generations back.

Thanks,
Steve

Posted by: Mr.H

Well...I am having a good corrospondance with a lady from FSU. And, strangely, she did the 'hello' note to me first (yes...i was suspicious).

But like the people here suggest...lay out some good hard questions and get the ground rules (so to speak) established.

And by all means phone...communication may be difficult (like some certain Mr.H did with a way too early phone call..*ahem*)
...that totally trashed her english). She did really appreciate it and I've phoned her several times (and at a more prudent time on the clock).

Since she is close to my age and has a common outlook on things I asked if she would rather meet in person just to make sure we are not wasting each other's time. One visit is not going to do it but it will eliminate much investment in time and guesswork due to the mail system (email or conventional).

Yeah it is spooky and costs a bit. But man, live the adventure (and the cost in the long run....matters not....it just means no laptop for me this year). I look at it as a win-win. Win if we just happen to be made for each other and wish to continue the relationship...Win if I get to visit a place I cannot even read a streetsign hosted by a very lovely lady. I am learning spoken russian tho..very crash course but it's a start.

I may be a little impetuous...but I consider this one of those opportunities that I simply cannot pass up.

But....I really hope you have fun and learn from this experience. And this site and the people really is helpful....

Posted by: tanya3475

[QUOTE]Originally posted by searcher
[B]Really! They were popular when I was in high school.

I know Michael jackson is quite popular there and in many other parts of Europe.

Well, Scorpions are still popular there! But why not?! They are timeless. I attend their concerts here in the US regularly. They are just superb!!!
Michael Jackson is popular over there too as well as people do still listen to Bon Jovi and George Michael, but hey, it's all way better than rap invasion

Posted by: Jason

Quote:

Originally posted by searcher

So, sorry for the off topic... but how did you like Omsk?

I enjoyed it quite a bit when I was there!

I want to return during a summer.

I had a great time in Omsk. In the summer it is a beautiful place, with hot weather, beaches along the river, cafes on the beaches, and the riverboats. I must say, too, that the girls there are very nice looking.

Posted by: andreas

Hi Shakey

I also decided to join only the night before last, I have 3 replies, ages 27 28, 28. All a bit too young for me at 44

Two of the three seem nice average and very pretty girls but #3 (28 year old) is like a model and seems like it could be a scam. As this is also new to me I will just wait and see. I continue talking to my good friends in Moscow, we have become very good friends and they are happy and excited to have me arrive one day and show me their wonderful city as well as to help me find accommodation etc. (I was invited to stay with them but have strongly refused as I think it may cause inconvenience).

Good luck in your journey

Andrew