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Russian woman says she can come to the USA to see me
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Posted by: Nick

Hi. I'm new to the idea of Russian women. I live in wisconsin USA and I have an ad on the yahoo personals looking for a woman within 15 miles from where I live. So far I have been contacted by 6 Russian women and 0 American woman. Which has gotten me thinking about finding a woman from Russia. I am 35 years old and very shy. Although I've always wanted a girlfriend, find love and get married. My shyness has prevented me from meeting women so I have never been in a romantic relationship. I have been e-mailing one Russian women since April. I don't feel like she has answered a lot of my questions but she has answered some and I have answered almost all of her questions. It seem like she is more interested in learning about me than telling me about herself. It has gotten to the point where she wants to meet me ( I also want to meet her). I told her that I would like to go to Russia and meet her but my finances are not good right now and that it might be a long time be for I could go see her. In her last letter she told me she loved me. That she has been talking to the travel agent and that it is not easy to get a tourist visa to come to the USA but she will have no problem getting one. I have read that it is almost imposable for someone from Russia to get a tourist visa. Now she might be coming to see me. She said she will ask her parents for help coming up with the money for travel and asked if I would help pay for part of it if the cost is high. She also said that if I didn't have the finances to help that she will try to come up with the money herself. I would (of course) help her with the cost but I would tell her that I would give her the money when she arrives. Since I am very shy I'm very nervious about meeting her. If I invite her to come see me, Can anyone tell me what I would be getting myself into? And is it really possible for her to get a tourist visa? I told a friend about her and they told me that the only reason this woman would be interested in me is because she wants to leave Russia and live in the USA. Is that true of Russian women?

Posted by: Khashyar

Hi Nick,

I'm sorry to say to you that this sounds like a classic "scam."

It is almost impossible for a Russian woman to receive a tourist visa to the U.S., thought she MAY be receiving false information from her travel agent.

I also feel that it is not a good sign that she is not answering many of your questions. If a person cared about you, then she would answer your questions that you have written her.

I have heard that there is a high incidence of fraud from Russian women in the Yahoo personals, so I would be very careful about this.

I just get a get feeling about this, so... you might want to move on....

Also, I would find a reputable source for meeting someone from the former Soviet Union...

Your friend is not right that "Russian Women" in general want to come to the U.S. for a visa or for money. There are some people who do not have good intentions, but... My experience shows me that most people are sincere in their wanting a happier life and a happy relationship.

Try reading some of the posts in this forum, and you will gain a lot of insight.

Good luck,

Khashyar

Posted by: Khashyar

Nick... another thing that you might want to try is to call her on the phone...

I think that you can learn a lot about a person by speaking with them on the phone.

If she somehow can't arrange speaking with you on the phone, then this is a very bad sign.

Khashyar

Posted by: Nick

She did bring up trying to call me on the phone in her second letter but I never pursued it because I wouldn't know what to say. Her letters are writen in very poor english. She said shes using a translater program but I can still only understand about half of what she says. Would a scammer write letters that are almost not understantable. When she was talking about not having any problem getting a visa she did say something about the ambassador but the way she worded it it was hard to understand. I really like this girl and hope shes not a scammer. I think I'm going to play along to see if she starts asking for money. I was scammed bad a by someone I knew in my home town a couple years ago (and it will take me years to recover). So I have no intention of sending money. But I would have no problem giving her money for travel if she arrives at my airport. It did seem strange that she never responded to me going to Russia and just started talking about coming to the USA.

Posted by: Khashyar

Hi Nick,

I didn't realize that her English was not that good, and that she is using a translating program to write you.

If you are having difficulty communicating, then it takes more time and communication to get to know someone.

You may want to, as you mentioned, just keep writing and communicate with her and see how the relationship develops...

Khashyar

Posted by: searcher

Hi Nick,

Might I suggest that you try to make arragements to call her.

There are some good translators around that would help you.

I think a phone call with the assistance of a human translator would help to clarify a few things.

If she agrees to letting you call her you could explain to her about the problems with her getting a visa to the U.S. You could also ask her some questions that you didn't get answers to and ask about some other important questions.

I think it would help clarify many things and to get a better understanding of some other things.

Posted by: Jill

Well, Nick, I wish you luck. Khashyar is right that it is very difficult for Russian women to get a US tourist visa. Be careful with this one.

I think you are being very smart, however, but not sending any money. If by some miracle she does get a visa, tell her you will help with her expenses ONLY after she arrives in the US.

Posted by: Pin Boy

nick, be very careful...you sound like a vulnerable , nice guy who wants what we all want and need, but you say you "really like this girl." for me that sounds like you're vulnerable because you don't even know this girl...this situation with russian women contacting american men through yahoo has come up quite often lately....and none of these sound genuine...keep reading and remember rules #1-1,000:

NEVER SEND MONEY TO A WOMAN YOU HAVE NEVER MET!!!!

good luck

pin boy

Posted by: Clarita

If she does not speak English, how do you plan to communicate if you ever meet??? Using hands language?

But if you still want to meet this girl and can not come to her, you can invite her to Dominican Republic, you can pay for her travel directly to travel agent, so she will need only pick up her tickets and hotel vaucher. She does not need visa to go there.

Posted by: Pin Boy

a vacation in the dominican republic sounds like a grand time!!!

Posted by: Nick

She said she studied English earlier in school and again in college and that she understands my letters very well. But she uses the interpreter program because its faster and more convenient to write in Russian. In her second letter she said it would be interesting to call me in the future so we could speak about different things. So I assume she can speak some English.

Where is the Dominican Republic? And what would be the advantage of meeting her in the Dominican Republic vs meeting her in Russia (she lives in saratov)? Sure, she may not need a visa to go there. But if I would go meet her, what would be the difference between going to the Dominic Republic or Russia?

I may be more vulnerable than most because of my shyness and lack of dating experience and not having been in a romantic relationship yet. So just the idea that an attractive woman is interested in me and wants to meet me is enough to cause me to have feelings for her. But I won't be sending any money.

Posted by: Khashyar

Hi Nick...

The Dominican Republic is the in the Caribbean (South of Florida)...

I personally think it is better to meet a person in their own country so that you can really see what her life is like and so that you can get to know her better. If you go to Russia, you can meet her friends and family, and also just see what her life is like...

I learned so much about my wife Lena by going and meeting her family adn friends. Her parents (and grandmother

) are such good people that I trusted Lena much more after I went to visit her.

It's o.k. to be shy... If I were you, I would move forward slowly so that your mind and instincts can evaluate this lady and that you do not become too emotionally invested in her before you really know who she is.

I would recommend telling yourself that you do not know how real this relationship is until you haev actually met her, and then thought about it a bit once you return back to your home country.

And asking questions and reading discussions in this forum will help you receive wisdom from the experience of others who have gone through exactly what you have.

Khashyar

Posted by: Nick

We have exchanged a couple more e-mails. She said that the agent of travel told her "precisely" that they can get her the documents and visa to come to the USA. The contact includes the price of the passport, insurance, visa and services of the agency. The cost being $750.00. They want that much because it is very difficult to receive the visa to the USA. She said that she has tried to borrow the money but nobody can help. She then asked if i could help her with the money. (My response: $750.00 would not be a problem for me. If you can get the visa. I will give you the money when we meet).

In her next letter she informed me that she "came into the travel company and signed the contract for travel". (We never once talked about when she would come visit).

In her latest letter she told me she bought photos to the travel company for her passport and they have began to develope her travel. She also said that the travel agent needs my address.

She hasn't asked me to send any money yet.
Could the travel agent be trying to scam her?

If this is a scam would it be safe to give her my address?

I would have no problem giving my address to a woman if I contacted her through a dating/marrage agentcy. However, she contacted me through the yahoo personals. And it seems like shes in a big hurry to come see me in the USA.

If this is a scam would I have anything to worry about if I give her my address?

Posted by: Skooter

Nick

Why give your address? in case she is serious!

Just move on, if you think she is going to pay 750 bucks to visit a photo, you are flattering yourself.

Best advice is call her, tell her if you are interested, that you are interested to visit her in her country/city.

Otherwise put it down to experience unless you have money to throw away.

Posted by: steve27t

It sounds like they are chipping away at you here, bit by bit, so you feel obliged to go along with the deal. It is the classic scam. Try and get back to reality with her, tell her straight there is no way she is coming to visit you, but you will go to her. See what happens.

I got contacted by a girl who suggested she come to visit me in USA, when I told her it was impossible but that I could go to her, it was the last letter I received!! It may be that your girl is getting carried away with the possibilities? but without you having met a visitor visa is impossible. Godd luck

Posted by: Pin Boy

DON'T SEND A THIN DIME!!!! tHIS IS CERTAINLY A SCAM!! iF SHE'S BEING CONNED BY THE TRAVEL AGENT, TOO BAD...BUT SHE WON'T LOSE A PENNY BUT YOU'LL BE OUT $750 AND THEN THEY'LL MOVE ON TO THE NEXT SUCKER!!!

kEEP A CLEAR HEAD!!

pIN bOY

Posted by: LMB

Nick this is definately a scam, i have lived in Moscow 11 years and it doesn't cost $750 to get a Passport and Tourist Visa to the USA.

Whilst on the subject it's not almost impossible for a Russian woman to get a tourist visa, i know many friends who have recieved them with no problems whatsoever.

My own wife got a tourist visa in 10 minutes, not once did the consular officer ask a question about her financial status, he spent 5 minutes laughing because she had a Visa for the Gambia.

Because i am a British citizen this may well have aided her application.

Ask her which travel agency she is using and i will make enquiries from over here if you wish.

Best of luck.

Lee

Posted by: neil277

Hello Nick,

Being shy is a good point in your life but you have to be street wise now, i am sending you p.m and feel my help will be good for you.

Regards,

Neil

Posted by: neil277

Hello Nick,

This lady is working on your weakness and it must stop now

Nick your kindness is never in doubt and a good Russian lady will love you for this and yes this ladies English is not good but being street wise is, so move on now and dont send money ever.

Regards

Neil

Posted by: klawsite

Hi Nick,

I suggest if you want to meet her. Meet her in her country. Meet her friends and family. If she shows no interest in it. Move on!!!
If she is really serious about meeting you. She will have no problem in having you come to meet her in Russia. Actually if she is serious, she should be quite happy to have you come to her to meet.
I know Nadya was thrilled when I mentioned that I was coming to meet her in person!!! Another thing, when Nadya and I first met. She was not able to speak English hardly at all. The first time I called her was on her birthday. I don't think we understood more than five words that each other said. But that phone call meant very much to both of us. We were just thrilled to hear each other's voice.
Give her a call, just don't expect to understand each other. I would imagine that if she is really serious with you, she should be deciding to take English lessons. Just be careful, do not fall head over heels for the girl until you meet her, you don't even really know her yet. Plus, I believe you have to meet face to face before you really know if the spark is there!! ;-)
Good luck!!

- Kevin

Posted by: Marc Dayton

I did not read the full post, but check black list and run her name on search you will find her somewere. SHE CANNOT GET A VISA look 100% this is a scam

Marc

Posted by: FlashingEyes

Nick,

This offering to call you in her second letter seems to be part of a new type of more sophisticated scam that some Russians are running recently - go to the Scams section and read the recent thread "Genuine ? - Or the Scam that never was ???" for an example.

Flash

Posted by: Gene Machine

Nick;

This has the pattern of the common scam. Usually by the 3rd or 4th letter she will have told you how much she likes you, how much she wants to be with you and how, with money, this can happen. Go to Google and look for something called The Russian Women Black List. It is a very current and constantly updated list of scammers and agencies and suspected scammers and agencies. Browse thru and look for her name or photograph. I found a couple myself that wrote to me via Yahoo Personals! Whats her name by the way! I found that their profiles disappear quickly because Yahoo figured out whats going on. But hey! Don't let me stop you, you will go thru a lot to find the one you're sure of. Her responses to you will be quite different!

In the same boat,
Gene Machine

Posted by: Marc Dayton

I would like to know if your still going to see this girl. I have worked for 9 years helping men. Lot,s of men want to belive she is not one of the girls out to rip someone off.

Look if you must do this plan for it. Have a back up plan its a long trip and lots of time money and effort. Make shere you have a back up interputer, and you might have an agency name and number for the city your going too.

Have a plan be safe not sorry,

P.S. my spelling is bad, but intent is good

Marc

Posted by: parasionok

Hi guys,

I am going to meet some friends (including those I met on this forum) in LA in January.... I am a Russian woman, I have a Russian passport with 2 years tourist visa in it. But of course, everybody here knows I am a famous Russian scammer

Para

Posted by: myshka

But a liar too! How could YOU a Russian woman, with a Russian passport, EVER GET A VISA to visit US? You must be lying! Or you must be a man

Everyone here knows *and repeats often*
(all together now) Russian Women Cannot Get a Visa to Visit You!!! If she says it, she is a Scammer!!

Ok, have a nice day

Posted by: ConnerVT

I wish you two would stop beating the hell out of this.

It is a 'rule of thumb', a generalized statement that for the most part is 99.9% true. And like most everything, there are exceptions. But you do people who visit here no help be yelling out "I'm exceptional!" I still have heard more stories of K-1 visas being denied than I've heard of Tourist visas being issued to women without family or business connections in the US.

So is the rule of thumb black and white? Of course it is. This is what makes it memorable. Aren't there exceptions? Of course there are. Problem is, everyone believes they should be the exception. It rarely works out that way. As a rule, it's good advice to those who visit here for the first time (many after receiving an unsolicited email from someone half way across the world). Don't worry, in time they will learn of your good fortune.

Posted by: BradIL

Quote:

Originally posted by Khashyar:
[B]Nick... another thing that you might want to try is to call her on the phone... I think that you can learn a lot about a person by speaking with them on the phone. Khashyar

Khashyar--- good point. Curious if you used this tool [phone conversations] to evaluate relationships when you were dating in the region?

Indeed, when you were dating Lena, how quickly, or how important to you was it to talk to her by phone? I mean when did it become more important to you to leave the e-mail realm and start to add voice communication in the mix?

I only ask to see what you & others married to RW in the forum have determined to be the value of "voice contact" between you & your spouses, and when in your relationships it became important.

Posted by: rob_we

ConnerVT

Quote:

I wish you two would stop beating the hell out of this.

Of course you are right that its not easy. Of course you are right that a lot attempts get denied. But as I understand my girl and myshka its about the "facts" that are stated everywhere here.
Those "facts" say clearly "If she sais she can come over shes a scammer"! Not its not easy, not its problematic. With this statements (on almost any thread here) its like someone would say any german kills jews, or any russian is a communist! Don´t trust them! Look everywhere here and elsewhere what happend when a discussion about this starts!
But see Conner you have a russian wife and you are happy! If you ask the majority of people who have tried to get in contact to somebody abroad they will tell you its impossible! Too many problems. All those frustrated ones or others who didn´t dare might say that anybody who lives actually with a russian girl must be somehow a bad guy who just took all the trouble to get someone to fulfil his "evil" ideas. Its a "red flag" if someone has a woman from abroad! And anybody of those people would know dozends of stories about this, that would proof this is true. Wouldn´t you react similar then? Actually I would. Never mind ....

Posted by: theworkingman

Yes I agree this doesn't sound right. You might want to try the Nice Bride Marriage Agency. They are very good and take care of everything. Nicebride.com I just came back from Yoshkar-Ola and meeting a lady who I think is just great and they took care of everything even other dates when my girl was busy. Best not to waist time among so many beautiful woman, don't you think? Tell them Joe from North Carolina sent you. : )

Posted by: don4

guys tell this guy to forget this scammer

Posted by: James Riske

The two Russian women in this thread made a very important, overlooked point: It is possible to get visas to the U.S. in Russia. I personally have met two Russian women in Los Angeles in the last six month who both got visas to the U.S. and I wasn't even looking. I saw their visas in their passports with my own eyes. Am I a lying?

One got a work visa from a company that has since gone bankrupt and the other got a tourist visa. She said it was hard and she was lucky but she did get it.

But the guys also make a good point: Don't EVER send a dime. And my feeling is to not send a dime to them even if you meet them and even if you consider them your fiance. So many women out there are of low morals and they feel perfectly justified in taking money from men that it is very common for them to take money from you and then dump you with the excuse that they 'changed their minds' or if you cut off or cut down the money, they will ruthlessly dump you for being cheap or stingy.

Be careful with your wallets guys and look logically at the real cost of what you're getting yourselves into.

Sorry for this comment ahead of time ladies and just ignore it as guy talk if you will but since the average married couple has sex about once every two weeks, do you really think it's worth all the time and ongoing expense of marrying a woman? Isn't it better to stay single and date or just have an ongoing relationship with an escort who comes around every week or so for a hundred bucks? Especially when you factor in all the maintenance that goes into the average 'modern' woman on a daily basis.

Think guys, think.

Posted by: Pin Boy

james,

i believe you may have, in other threads, also advocated (for lack of a better word) men frequenting prostitutes...of course, it's your opinion, but the degradation and exploitation of women associated with prostitution is just too ugly to ignore...yes, some women make the choice of their own free will but too many are coerced either physically or economically to not denounce the practice.

but i do agree with what you said about some women dropping you like a hot potato if you don't keep the money pipeline open full bore...that is definitley true.

pin boy