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Posted by: Raspberry

One of the problems that I had during this trip is assuming that a person is in a particular place. Due to the fact that people have mobile phones, this changes the whole picture.

I had assumed that I was talking to the Sumy girl in Gluhov(in Sumy Oblast, and about 60 miles or so from Sumy).....when in actuality she was in Kiev.

As for the Zaporozhye girl, she was not even in the city, as I had stopped at her apartment........she was definitely out of town, and presumably in Yalta.

This had caused some unneccessary waiting, and time wasted, where I could be doing something else.

I cannot stress this enough....ASK the girl where she actually is!!

Posted by: freebird

Good advice...

That's one advantage of planning ahead for a meeting, where & when

Posted by: Chrismc

Raspberry

That is one reason I stated in your other thread, do the legwork at home, get things arranged while you are at home, concrete things, otherwise you are in for a lot of wasted time.

In all my trips over to Ukraine and Russia, I have always met up with who I was going to see without any hitches. But of course I made sure that I knew what would be happening when I got there long before I even booked tickets to go.

You go about these trips much differently to the way I do, I only ever travelled around whilst there, if, I was with a women, not on the off chance I may meet a women.

Sorry, but the way you go about these trips, when it comes to meeting women, anyway, it seems to be more of a wing and a prayer approach, and the results are in the lap of the gods, rather than a well planned journey.

Chris

Posted by: Manchester

Do you just arrive unannounced at the door?

Posted by: Raspberry

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chrismc

Raspberry That is one reason I stated in your other thread, do the legwork at home, get things arranged while you are at home, concrete things, otherwise you are in for a lot of wasted time.

In all my trips over to Ukraine and Russia, I have always met up with who I was going to see without any hitches. But of course I made sure that I knew what would be happening when I got there long before I even booked tickets to go.

You go about these trips much differently to the way I do, I only ever travelled around whilst there, if, I was with a women, not on the off chance I may meet a women.

Sorry, but the way you go about these trips, when it comes to meeting women, anyway, it seems to be more of a wing and a prayer approach, and the results are in the lap of the gods, rather than a well planned journey.

Chris

Chris, if anything, all the footwork was already done, plans were made, before I left America. Save for the third girl, which I decided not to see. And without the third girl, this also gave me a little more slack time to play with.

I had called the Sumy girl a week before, as well as two days before I left. The apartment reservations were made through her agency. Everyone knew that I was going to fly into Kharkov, and arrive in Sumy on 1 May.

As for Zaporozhye, I had called the week before, called before I left, and even got an e-mail from her three days into the trip. She said to call her right before I was leaving for Zap, and to let her know how I was going to get there. She very much well knew I was to arrive in Zap on the 8th.(Of course I was not able to reach her until the 9th).

So, this is, not by any means, something hap-hazardly done, as you say. Arrangements were made with both of these ladies, and they were fully aware and agreed with that.

It would be one thing if these ladies suddenly had plans, or decided to change their minds.....that would be OK with me....but at least tell me.......they just could tell their respective agencies and have them contact me.

Posted by: Raspberry

Quote:

Originally Posted by Manchester

Do you just arrive unannounced at the door?

No Manchester, these meetings were planned before I left the US. And now, I am a bit bitter about the lack of common courtesy. At least these girls should have just plain said, "I am not interested" instead of agreeing to meetings they weren't going to keep.

Posted by: Chrismc

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raspberry

I agree with you there Raspberry, a common courtesy is all you ask for, it is not a lot to ask. I just wonder did these women come to realise that you were meeting others also? maybe they got wind of it and decided to scarper? maybe that worked against you?? it seems odd that they all had sudden reasons not to meet with you

Posted by: Raspberry

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chrismc

I think it's a conspiricy here........perhaps visiting another city---even to meet friends from the US or do touristy things-----could be a red flag for them. And they decided to just pull the plug and keep me hanging.

Posted by: Chrismc

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raspberry

I think there is definitely something, maybe because you are touring round, whether to see women or whatever, they put 2 and 2 together and come up with 5.

Maybe it is best you stick to one place at a time in the future, that is what I have done and only toured if with a women on tow.

Really I still think it is best to concentrate on one city, camp out there and make contact with a good prospect before you go, get to know her as best you can and take the name of an agency in that city with you just in case you need a back up. It is a lot easier than travelling around from one place to another on the off chance the lady will be there for you.

Good luck with the rest of your trip anyway.

Posted by: Spakoyna

I will voice one of my suspisions about the agency network. I believe that any agency can access the letters you exchange with your ladies. After I hammered out plans with my wife on our 1st meeting I was bombarded with letters. A few were so bold as to say "I will be happy to meet you when you arrive" in a 1st letter to me! My wife was also able to find out if I was corresponding with anyone else. I do not believe she would have met with me if I had been.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raspberry

Posted by: Raspberry

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spakoyna

I will voice one of my suspisions about the agency network. I believe that any agency can access the letters you exchange with your ladies. After I hammered out plans with my wife on our 1st meeting I was bombarded with letters. A few were so bold as to say "I will be happy to meet you when you arrive" in a 1st letter to me! My wife was also able to find out if I was corresponding with anyone else. I do not believe she would have met with me if I had been.

This is interesting.........and both of these girls were from two different agencies....if they were from the same agency, I can see it......

So, if they have private e-mail, go with that, if at all possible....

Posted by: Stirlitz

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raspberry

That is why I usually recommend 10+ dates when going over. If 2 or 3 fall out you will still have some left.

Posted by: Chillidog

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spakoyna

Spakoyna,

very interesting thought, were the other ladies from the same agency as you wife was. I would assume they are. becuase if this is the case I can see them getting wind or chatting going on at the agency of a particular man arriving. so please supply some more info. For myself I am writing two women (Mariupol-Sumy) totaly different towns. Have always been a VO, but would like to meet both on one trip by spending at least a week with each in their home towns, but if you feel that different agencies maybe sharing info, I may have to re-think how I am going to conduct this trip when and if it happens, becuase I am of the belief if a women beleives you are just traveling to meet her she will be very attentive to you and this trip, but if she learns or suspects you are meeting many, then I think her attitude changes.

Posted by: Raspberry

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stirlitz

That is why I usually recommend 10+ dates when going over. If 2 or 3 fall out you will still have some left.

I was trying to avoid doing this, and spend "quality time" with a few, instead of lining up a big list. But it looks like I will have to go back to "overbooking".

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spakoyna

I will voice one of my suspisions about the agency network. I believe that any agency can access the letters you exchange with your ladies.

It may be often true, especially since some small agencies are also affiliated with Elena's, AFA, Anastasia, Angelika, etc......and will have profiles on all of the above. I can understand how that may happen.The girl from Zaporozhye is on at least four sites.

What IS puzzling is that I only saw the Sumy girl posted on Hearts Desire ONLY, and not on any of the other sites.....which kind of defies the logic.

Posted by: OzGuyLooking

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raspberry

This is exactly it. There are very few lone agencies around nowadays. Most are linked to the bigger setups somehow. If you google russian brides and click each link on the first few pages you will most probably see that even the page setup is pretty similar for many sites indicating what parent site they are linked to.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raspberry

What IS puzzling is that I only saw the Sumy girl posted on Hearts Desire ONLY, and not on any of the other sites.....which kind of defies the logic.

I do know from personal experience that some women put their profiles on one site but because of the agency they go through have access to the resources of others. Also from personal experience, last year I was communicating with 2 ladies from different towns but nearish to Moscow, who even though they were on two different small apparently lone agencies, went to university with each other and are even in the same classes. if you are talking to a more than one it is possible they will find out and all you can do about it is be open and honest if they ask you.

Posted by: Raspberry

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chillidog

...... but if she learns or suspects you are meeting many, then I think her attitude changes.

What sometimes happens, if you are making a multi-city trip, they sometimes assume that you are a "sex tourist", and not serious. Not the majority think this way, but there are certainly enough women that do think like this....

Posted by: freebird

Then should have a good reason why you are going to another city. Meeting a friend {perhaps from RMP} or relative is a good one. When I left one girl I told her I was travelling to see my friend's wedding {which I actually was} but I didn't tell her that I was going to see another girl along the way.

Posted by: Chillidog

Quote:

Originally Posted by freebird

Then should have a good reason why you are going to another city. Meeting a friend {perhaps from RMP} or relative is a good one. When I left one girl I told her I was travelling to see my friend's wedding {which I actually was} but I didn't tell her that I was going to see another girl along the way.

I have only done the VO method. Yet in my next trip (if it happens now) I was looking at meeting 1 woman from Mariupol and 1 woman from Sumy. My thought (basic plan) was that I would fly into Kiev and from Kiev take a train (or domestic flight) to Mariupol, spend a week with this woman, then hop on the return train/plane back to Kiev, then once back in Kiev take a train to Sumy and spend one week with the woman from Sumy. this way I was hoping both woman would feel that I was 'not' a sex tourist and was in fact there to be with them and concentrate on building a relationship with her and discovering if there was enough of a basis for future meetings with the end result being marriage of course. I do not travel unless I feel that there 'is' something to travel for, what I want her to understand and feel from me is that I am there for her, that this trip was made because I do feel that there is good hope for a future between us. So I have great concerns for myself about meeting more than one, and if they have knowledge of this (meeting more than 1) they would not give me the same considerations that I am hoping to show them, if push comes to shove with my personality, I feel that if seeing more than one would diminish my chances with all or any that I meet, then I will choose the one I feel is the best fit for me and I for her, and visit only one again and just hope for the best. I know this is a long process, and there are view points from both camps on the VO or VM, for this I think the determining factor is each persons comfort level with each method and their own personality. I think it is possible to know on the first visit that you found the 'one' , I think if this is found on a VM method the person must be prepared to return and visit just this 'one' woman almost instantly or the good that was built can easily be lost, or doubt will creep into the woman's mind that you were just 'sex' tourist, but even with the VO method there is a need for additional visits and time together to strengthen the initial bond. Maybe the hardest part in this whole process is 'not' finding the 'one' but once found dealing and keeping the flames burning bright during the long periods apart!!!! I know I lost out on the 'one' because of time and distance.