"Diary of a Mail Order Bride" online - Russian Ukrainian Belarus Travel Music Woman Dating News

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"Diary of a Mail Order Bride" online
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Posted by: GreenBarb

Here is a google link to the "Diary of a Mail Order Bride" documentary.
Featuring our own "JamesB".

http://video.google.com/videoplay?d...098886160262479

Enjoy......

Posted by: GreenBarb

JamesB, watching the programme made me think of the first time I met my wife's family and the deathly silence between the bits of conversation. That and the feeling of being under a microscope and everything you do being scrutinized

.
I also had to laugh at the colour of the paint on the walls of the stairwell in the flats, the green/blue paint seems to be everywhere, even in Dimitrovgrad they must buy it in bulk....lol.

Posted by: freebird

Quote:

Originally Posted by GreenBarb

.
I also had to laugh at the colour of the paint on the walls of the stairwell in the flats, the green/blue paint seems to be everywhere, even in Dimitrovgrad they must buy it in bulk....lol.

Paint? On the Stairwalls? You must have been in one of the Ritzy buildings!

By the way, shouldn't we all have a new term for the seriously outdated & semi-offensive MOB? International Internet Dating? or something like that?

Posted by: GreenBarb

Freebird, I didn't pick the title but I agree with you. I didn't meet my wife from an agency but through a free profile site. I wasn't even looking for a Russian Woman.
How about a name like "Internet Introductions" ?
I think that would be more fitting a description.

I think the documentary does show some of the wrong ways and the right way to go about the process of finding the right person from another country.

Posted by: freebird

Yes, I think that or just plain "Internet Dating" is probably good. I noticed the start of the Documentary has the guy choosing the girl & then clicking "order", its this misinformation that gets lots of guys scammed. "Gee, I only have to send her $1,500 and she shows up on my doorstep!"

Posted by: JamesB

Thanjks Greenbarb, well it was,nt me who clicked order for sure.I was a bit embarrassed at looking scruffy but Aeroflot lo0st my bags so for two days i couldnt shave.Had a great time and it was all worth it.

Liuda and i had met earlier in the year.On another forum comments were made that i flew to Prague and liuda had a 5 day train journey with her mum but her mum refused to fly .

I still speak to Dave the other guy from Lancs and he is well and not dating right now.He has moved to a new house which is a relief.

Posted by: Felice

Quote:

Originally Posted by GreenBarb

Here is a google link to the "Diary of a Mail Order Bride" documentary.
Featuring our own "JamesB".

http://video.google.com/videoplay?d...098886160262479

Enjoy......

This video is a warning to Russian girls: BE CAUTIOUS with WESTERN FREAKS!
All three guys in this video look like a bunch of idiots desperate for the young flesh. Sooorrry....

Posted by: freebird

Quote:

Originally Posted by Felice

This video is a warning to Russian girls: BE CAUTIOUS with WESTERN FREAKS!
All three guys in this video look like a bunch of idiots desperate for the young flesh. Sooorrry....

That's a bit harsh isn't it Felice? I think this whole MOB description is way off the mark. What goes on with Russian (& other) dating agencies is not really different to those in our own country. Two people make a connection and decide to spend their lives together. With the difference in language & culture one must just be a little more careful. The girls from Russia or Ukraine understand that there is some sacrifice involved in getting a man from the west, he may not be some young stud like she could fins at home. But, as several girls have told me they started out marrying/living with a young handsome stud, but became disappointed when he started hitting the bottle & chasing other women. I think by the age of 25-30 the girl realizes that she is not exactly a teenager anymore, and would prefer a little older, stable man who is well mannered and will take care of her. Not all, but some want this. If the girls their are happy with their situation, good for them.

My girl told me she was tired of seeing the country fall apart with no real hope for the future. There is no real reason why the lobbys & outsides of Soviet-block buildings have to be dirty, decrepit & unmaintained - thats just the way it is. I don't understand why they can have an army of women to sweep the steets, but can't get the potholes filled even when they are the size of moon-craters. I dont understand how a teacher or a doctor can survive on $150 - $200 per month. All I know is that some want to leave there, and they would prefer to marry a western man. (lucky for me!

)

Posted by: JamesB

Felice, I have to say that in my time on this forum i have never been called a freak.

I was one of the guys in the Documentary and if you read a few of my posts you would see that liuda approached me and i didnt take her too seriosly until long after we started to correspond because of her age.

I dont think that if two people happy age or race should be an issue.
Most people on this site are looking for the same thing which could be , happiness, love or just companionship.

Why are you on this forum if you are making such sweeping judgements on people you dont know.
All i know is that liuda and i are very happy and now have a beautiful daughter.I would have married liuda if sh had been the same person but from . France or Italy.

I would not in fact have looked at liuda beacause of her age but luckily she chose me.

Judge yourself!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: freebird

Hey James, i hope that was just an awkward attempt at humour on her part - her avatar does say "cheeky"! It seems similar to the disbelief of "Youlek", in her mid 20's, unable to imagine that a woman can see anything in a man other than youth & beauty. After they have a couple of kids with their young stud - he hits the bottle or finds a mistress, then they change their tune fast! as they say, "To each his own"

Posted by: swindoom

My wifes opinion of that programme was very different, she felt it portrayed FSU women looking for western men as desperate, money grabbing "whores". She was very upset at the end and refuses to watch it again.
I remember watching an equivalent Russian documentary which was basically government propaganda to scare Russian women into staying in Russia. The basic message was western men are fat and lazy, will treat their Russian wife like a dog and eventually kill them, so they can marry another young Russian lady.

Posted by: JamesB

well i find it pretty sad that people think that way.This forum was based around people meeting ans as i said if people are happy together regardless of where they are from whats the problem.

Posted by: swindoom

The problem with a tv documentary is it gives a limited edited snap shot of what is going on, not enough information to know the real story.

C4 should make a follow up programme "Diary of a Mail Order Bride - Revisited" to show how things are after two years or so.

Posted by: GreenBarb

With all due respect I think the Documentary tried to give a balanced view of the whole thing. You had the Texan who went like the whole thing was a buisness approach, Dave who had the bad luck and JamesB who was the success story and found happiness and Love.
It also showed the different ways in which people meet and the pearls involved, with things like with the Socials and meeting family and their concerns.

But I would have to take offence to being described as a "Western Freak". As one of those "Western Freaks" I have been to Russia many times, got married to a Loving and wonderful woman and we have a great baby boy. Have had her family visit us here in Ireland, to see our lifestyle here. Like JamesB my wife was the one who made first contact with me also.
So Felice I don't know why you would brand us "Western Freaks" maybe you got burned by someone, I don't know but we are not all the same. Those of us who do find that someone special from another country are just happy and love our wives, like everyone else. The only difference is that we had to travel a bit further to find the right person for us and were willing to take the chance.

Posted by: EasyTarget

The documentary was showing three categories of international relationships.

Clueless (Texan), Scammer(Dave) and Success(James).

I think the Texan was clueless about what it takes to have an international relationship. He thought he could show up, meet a girl, and propose. OR maybe he was just after having a great time. I think there are many men that have his thought process.

Dave was getting scammed. Although he didn't know it. I don't think the woman was ever really serious about being with Dave long term. She was looking for a way out of dodge and was trying any way she could to do it.

Then we have success. Honestly James, your story was too happy and cheerful to make good television. The only negatives things they could show where you in the same clothes and not speaking much Russian. Damn, you should have picked a huge fight with her or maybe a fight with her dad. Come on' need to spice it up for ratings. (that was all tongue in cheek)

Granted I don't know any of these people personally, and I am just giving my opinion of how they were portrayed in the documentary.

Of course it makes for much more interesting television to concentrate on the negative aspects, rather then the success stories.

Posted by: freebird

I looked at the first bit of the documentary, it seemed like it was a bit misleading. first they have the fellow looking through all the girls profiles, then a closeup of him clicking "order" as if he just has to pay the $$$ and she will arrive in the mail. Its more like all the other internet dating, you find someone's profile, send a message and see if it goes anywhere. I think the documentary kept the same stereotypes of MOB's with some of the public's negative perceptions

Posted by: JamesB

Hi there,you should be a film critic.Lol

Posted by: JamesB

Hi There,I was embarresed about the same cloths but for two days my bags were lost in Moscow while i was waiting in Siberia.

It was a great trip and we go back in Dec for xmas.

Posted by: freebird

Quote:

Originally Posted by JamesB

Hi There,I was embarresed about the same cloths but for two days my bags were lost in Moscow while i was waiting in Siberia.

It was a great trip and we go back in Dec for xmas.

I remember hauling a whole bunch of clothes on my first trip & then thinking later I should have brought only about half, and bought the rest at the Rinka (Bazzar)

Posted by: JamesB

Hi, the reason i was stuck in the same cloths for two days was that Aeroflot has lost my bags and i had to wait for them.
But it was a great trip and we go back soon.

Posted by: Felice

Quote:

Originally Posted by freebird

That's a bit harsh isn't it Felice? ]

I simply did not follow political correctness by calling a spade a spade.

I think this whole MOB description is way off the mark. What goes on with Russian (& other) dating agencies is not really different to those in our own country.] I disagree. I think there is some difference. Unlike Russian girls ladies in your country are much better informed about local guys.

[Two people make a connection and decide to spend their lives together. With the difference in language & culture one must just be a little more careful. ]
I wonder which of them should be more careful ? Perhaps that person who will be dependent in future on the other one?

[The girls from Russia or Ukraine understand that there is some sacrifice involved in getting a man from the west, he may not be some young stud like she could fins at home. But, as several girls have told me they started out marrying/living with a young handsome stud, but became disappointed when he started hitting the bottle & chasing other women.]
Absolutely agree that sacrifice was involved in the relation of 51y.o. British guy who amazed his potential 22 y.0. fiancee by drinking too much beer and living in dirty house without proper bed.

[I think by the age of 25-30 the girl realizes that she is not exactly a teenager anymore, and would prefer a little older, stable man who is well mannered and will take care of her. ]
I wonder, do girls in U.S.A. in this age realize the same?

[Not all, but some want this. If the girls their are happy with their situation, good for them.]
You quite right but we could not see a happy end we have to wait at least for three or five years.

[My girl told me she was tired of seeing the country fall apart with no real hope for the future. There is no real reason why the lobbys & outsides of Soviet-block buildings have to be dirty, decrepit & unmaintained - thats just the way it is. I don't understand why they can have an army of women to sweep the steets, but can't get the potholes filled even when they are the size of moon-craters. I dont understand how a teacher or a doctor can survive on $150 - $200 per month. All I know is that some want to leave there, and they would prefer to marry a western man. (lucky for me!

)

I have nothing against western men generally, I just said what I really think about the video.
On the one hand I saw badly informed young girls with very low confidence;
on the other hand - much older American/British men who can't even communicate with girls, as they do not bother to speak any Russian;
who are not wealthy at all, some of them are really poor;
but still they(guys) are sure they have right to get a toy.
One of them (51y.o. Brit) was definitely with mental problems,
another one (a part-time British bouncer) is really not enough for that beautiful girl
and the third one (the american at social in St.Petersburg) got in the end what he deserved.........

Posted by: freebird

Quote:

Originally Posted by Felice

First Felice i think you could have made your point without using inflammatory language like "Freaks" & "Idiots", no matter what your personal opinion, you could have been a little more polite, considering that one of the subjects in the show is a poster here.

Second- to clarify I was refering to people meeting on the "internet", all girls (&guys) should be careful with this kind of meeting. but remember, people in America get involved with other (local) people, only to find they are "golddiggers" or "psycho's" etc. I have also heard about Russian girls who get married to a local guy, only to find out that he turns into an Ogre. I will agree with you though, the girl who plans to move to another country should be very careful.

Third - about being careful. They BOTH should be very careful, a wrong choice is just as devastating for the guy than from the girl.

Fourth, about "Sacrifice" she obviously knew he was 51, she made the choice to marry, as for drinking beer, did she not know or not ask beforehand? As for the dirty house and unsuitable bed - a good cleaning & new bed - problem solved.

Your fifth point (about American girls) - sorry I should have said "some" girls. This is a personal choice, some girls in the USA do this, others like to have a "boy toy", others ignore men and find enjoyment in food. To each his own.

Sixth point - Waiting 3 -5 years, I agree with you on this point.

As you say, its your opinion about the documentary, you are certainly entitled to it, and are welcome to post your thoughts.

As for learning Russian, I agree with you, I did before I went there, I think all the men should at least have a basic understanding.

But you say the 51 yr. old is "not enough" for the young girl - thats her choice isn't it, who are we to say?

Posted by: GoingToRussia

Pesonaly I think the documentary was great! I wish I had seen it about 2 years ago before I started this process. I would have done things much differently.

Felice - Please stop the name calling. It is against forum policy to attack people and can result in banning a member if they continue attacking other members. You can express your opinion as you like but please do so in a mature and acceptable manner.

Posted by: freebird

Quote:

Originally Posted by GreenBarb

Here is a google link to the "Diary of a Mail Order Bride" documentary.
Featuring our own "JamesB".

http://video.google.com/videoplay?d...098886160262479

Enjoy......

Hi GreenBarb, thanks for the link, but there were only 3 parts, were there more segments? I didn't get the end of the story.

Posted by: Felice

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoingToRussia

Pesonaly I think the documentary was great! I wish I had seen it about 2 years ago before I started this process. I would have done things much differently.

Felice - Please stop the name calling. It is against forum policy to attack people and can result in banning a member if they continue attacking other members. You can express your opinion as you like but please do so in a mature and acceptable manner.

The men have starred in the film, it means they are famous now.
If they are brave enough to be recorded - they should be brave enough to be discussed (criticized).

And last but not least:
Famous people shoud not be scared to be attacked by beautiful Russian women.

Posted by: JamesB

Felice, i am the part time bouncer you saw and we now have a successfull business and are both very happy together.

I think maybe you have something missing in your life that you are so critical of others or perhaps its just a charactor flaw.

I can and have accepted critisism on this forum but from people who know me and my circumstances and are informed.You are neither.!!!!!!

Posted by: Felice

Quote:

Originally Posted by JamesB

Felice, i am the part time bouncer you saw and we now have a successfull business and are both very happy together.

I think maybe you have something missing in your life that you are so critical of others or perhaps its just a charactor flaw.

I can and have accepted critisism on this forum but from people who know me and my circumstances and are informed.You are neither.!!!!!!

Well Mr James, I stop teasing you.

Good luck!

Posted by: JamesB

I think its a shame you have such an outlook on things.Maybe one day you will be happy.

Posted by: GentleGiant

Hey James, Perhaps Felice is just jealous that she did not see your profile and marry you first!!!
MeooWW!!

My opinion of the Documentary, then and now having just re-watched it, is that (our) James comes across very well, as a honest and responsible man, yes he does not speak Russian, but the English do have problems learning other languages because ours is so easy.
I have been struggling to learn Russian for over a year now and am still stuck on lesson 16 out of 100.

The Yorkshire James came across as a bit inadequate, I felt both sad for him and embarrassed by his behaviour, but Felice and others have only seen the Doc, they do not know that his woman was cheating on him long before she came to England and taking money and gifts from several other men.

As for the Yank, I am afraid to say he came over as the typical loud mouthed, self obsessed, sex tourist; a tag that seems to stick to many Americans. much to the despair of the seriously minded ones.

He expected to go out there, say "I'll have THAT ONE" , and for her to just accept his decision, he was expecting a real "Mail Order Bride", not a real life woman. I think the fact he went off and ignored all the advice and got stung for $$ shows that he is an idiot and from going of to have sex in a car with those two GTG's that he was not serious about finding a "Good" woman, he wanted a "Trophy Wife" and some easy sex.

He was treating then as cattle and not thinking feeling human beings.

I too would like to see a follow up, but I know that the attention from the newspapers was not kind to James and Liuda, so I am unsure if he would want to go through it all again; how are the carpets James??

Of course if they want to run another program about new couples they can pay for me to go to Dubai, but be quick !! I am leaving in 36 days!!!

Nobody quite believes how attractive T is, so I would not mind parading with her for the world to drool over and mutter about me being a lucky bugger.

Posted by: The Dark Knight

I didn't interperet it as the Texan as having sex, merely that the young lady took a feel and he "didn't mind."

Also, I recall him being asked "whether he thought it possible to meet a fiance in 5 (?) days?" and he replied "No, but I think its possible to meet a candidate or two and start correspondence."

That doesn't sound like a sex tourist to me.

He was scammed out of the phone, though. I do like what he said about her pointing out that there was a phone store over there and he said, "Yeah, and there is a ham store over there."

There is another documentary on youtube but only 2 of the 7 parts are posted. If you want to see what I'd call a sex tourist, see Part One:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbZqdvg5u4Y

Posted by: GentleGiant

I think part 2 shows him even more; talking about "Test Driving" the girls.

But the Texan, talked all serious but he didn't ACT it, he went off with TWO women not one, and although he didn't say they had sex in the car, it does sound to me as if he was implying it.
I have seen the original of the program on YouTube, later on they show several men getting very upset because the women supposedly writing to them for several months did not have a clue who the were; shades of Cindy's ??? Did you notice the agency was AnastaisiaWeb ??

Posted by: JamesB

Hi Giant, well good news the carpets are fine and everyone is well.Liudas sister may be coming over early next year.
Its amazes me how even after all this time the docu still gets mentioned.I have spoken to Dave from Lancashire and he has a new flat.Much tidier.lol

Posted by: GoingToRussia

Has he given up on finding a Russian Bride?

Posted by: The Dark Knight

Because the Texan left with two women is the reason I think he didn't have sex with her/them.

Regarding the second video, yes notice it was Anastasia's, I missed that the first time I watched it several weeks ago. That guy in the video was a total creep; I think we BOTH need shots after watching him! Gee, what gentleman "letting the ladies test drive him!" Can't find a vomiting smilie!

I'd like to see the rest but I'm unwilling to do so for a fee. Whatever the price, its too much.

Posted by: Felice

[QUOTE=GentleGiant2]Hey James, Perhaps Felice is just jealous that she did not see your profile and marry you first!!!
MeooWW!!

]

Thank you for your support!
At last gentleman came to the forum.
I've appreciated your joke.

I just want to make it clear.
I have nothing against James.
When I posted my first message about the video I did not mean particularly him .
I called all the guys ( bunch of ****). But James appeared too offended that is why all public's attention was drawn to him.

I even had no idea that he was on the forum.....

P.S.
I used to work in Russian dating agencies, so for me different 'Foreign Affairs' or 'Anastasia' sound too familiar, but I do not want to continue.....
Any way good luck!

Posted by: JamesB

Yep, we spoke on the phone about 3 weeks ago and he has given up which is a shame.
He had a brief spell writing to another girl but it didnt work out.

Also i think the programme made things difficult for hiom as he lives in a small community and he was constantly being recognised.

Posted by: freebird

Quote:

Originally Posted by Felice

[QUOTE=GentleGiant2]Hey James, Perhaps Felice is just jealous that she did not see your profile and marry you first!!!
MeooWW!!

]

Thank you for your support!
At last gentleman came to the forum.
I've appreciated your joke.

But Felice I thought you said you were already in a relationship? you are right though, the documentary did not show any of the guys in a very positive light. Although I only saw the first 40 min, (3x 14 min segments) does anyone have the link for the end bit?

Posted by: JamesB

I have to say im getting pretty bored with having people that dont know me pass judgement.
Whatever light you saw me in through the programme,we now have a good business and are very happy together.Liuda finds this more upsetting than me but to be honest we dont need your approval.
The docu obviously showed clips and lots was missed out but i didnt edit it.If some of you are as happy as we are you will be very lucky .

Posted by: GentleGiant

Felice, the documentary people edit their films to show what they want, there has recently been a scandal here in England after some nasty editing left a film clip apparently showing our Queen storming out of a photo shoot.

If you can understand that the editors tried to make James look as bad as possible by choosing the worst aspects of his adventure, realise that, even after that, he does not seems to be so awful anyway; you may understand that he is a "Good" man.
Are you aware that less than 5% of all the men who write to a Russian woman ever go to meet them??
Liuda "found James, persuaded him the she was not too young and manoeuvred him into marrying her, he did not go looking for a "child bride" or a "sex tour". He went looking for a woman to love and cherish for the rest of his life.
Talking of being manoeuvred; James !! Have you finished paying off her credit card yet ?? :-)
I mean that in the nicest possible way James, Liuda wanted you and did everything she could to make sure she got you. You were like a hungry fish looking at a big, fat, juicy worm wriggling on a hook in front of you!!!

If things do not work out with Tahmina, you realise I will be camping out on your doorstep, waiting for Liuda's sister to arrive.

frflowr:

Posted by: GentleGiant

Glitch, that should be a smilie holding a red rose.

Try again......

frflowr: still not working!!!

Posted by: Felice

Quote:

Originally Posted by freebird

[QUOTE=Felice]
But Felice I thought you said you were already in a relationship? you are right though, the documentary did not show any of the guys in a very positive light. Although I only saw the first 40 min, (3x 14 min segments) does anyone have the link for the end bit?

Yes, I am married lady.
Does it make any difference?

Posted by: EasyTarget

James: You know what you have, and what you don't have. And anybody who judges you by seeing 12 minutes on a video, well they are naive and not worth replying too.

By my accounts I am wishing I find what you have in 40 days.

Posted by: Felice

Quote:

Originally Posted by EasyTarget

James: You know what you have, and what you don't have. And anybody who judges you by seeing 12 minutes on a video, well they are naive and not worth replying too.

By my accounts I am wishing I find what you have in 40 days.

Do you mean exactly a girl who is much younger you,
and who does not speak any English?
Well, you are welcome there are still enough naive girls in Russia.

Anyway, good luck!

Posted by: freebird

Quote:

Originally Posted by JamesB

James I think you were quite brave to allow yourself on the documentary, not knowing how it would be edited & how you would be portrayed. I certainly did not mean to pass judgement, it is only the portrayal that I can comment on. I think the point I was trying to make was that you & Liuda both made a choice to make a go of it, so it was the decision of two adults, made with eyes open. I'm very glad that it worked out, I hope I will have the same success too. Cheers mate! Say Hi to Liuda.

P.S. does Liuda post on the Russian forum too?

Posted by: The Dark Knight

James,

I thought you came off quite well. You were holding down two jobs (presumably to support your travel), travelled several times to meet her and you married her.

I don't see the problem here.

Congrats to Liuda and you!

Posted by: JamesB

Felice, you seem to think any younger girl whom meets an older guy os naive, well i beg to differ.
Also i have to say when you mention the English language , liuda now speaks very good English and her written English is perfect.Perhaps you should starty some classes.

Posted by: AJROOK

Hey James...
I really enjoyed the documentary and I will say I am not sure I could have done that. I related well to it as I seemed to connect with the type of guy you are. I enjoyed it and I think you did great. I also think you came out with a great woman and your happiness is pretty obvious....so well done!!!

Andy

Posted by: JamesB

Thanks mate, it was pretty nerve wracking but well worth it.It started off bably with my bags arriving after two days so i was wearing same gear.Not good but all worth it.

Im no longer bouncing and my business is growing slowly.Liuda has started buying mobiles and nikon Cameras from China and selling on ebay and she,s doing great.

We go back to siberia in Dec for three weeks.

Posted by: Felice

Quote:

Originally Posted by JamesB

Thank you for your advice, I've passed my British citizenship test already.

By the way, do you know Home Office prices?
Prices for marriage visa extension, ILR, citizenship.
My husband had to pay for me and my daughter ~ �1700
and now Home Office has doubled the prices...

Have a good time,
Good luck!