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need help bad ( please)
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Posted by: mark38668

hello all im mark and new to the group,i need lot's of help with this whole dating thing,im 37 was married for 17 years that marriage ended 2005.
here are my questions!!!

(1) what site would you say was the best? im using one now that charges for every e-mail.

(2) im about 40 lb's over weight will that hurt my changes with the women?

(3) iv heard when you go on a tour you have 100's of laide's to choose from? just point one out!!! surely this is not true?

(4) i live in a small town in mississippi doesnt that really hurt me as well?

(5) are people from the united states welcome in the ukraine?

(6) if i were to go to the ukraine should i book every thing with the site im on or here in the u.s ?

(7) not being able to speak the languauge how would one even get out of the
air port?

(8) iv been talking to a lady for about two weeks now...well im 37 and she's 26 too much age diff.????? hope not

(9) what about there attitudes about sex? iv heard nothing on this matter.

(10) after 3 or 4 letter's i seem to loose the lady.any do's and dont's as far as my letter's?

(11) with only 2% of people in the ukraine having e-mail how do they respond to me?

(12) im 6 foot 4 and 260 lb's...whats with theses pictures of these short,bald,very over weight men marrying these model quality women? hope that wasnt a rude question!!!!

well thats all i can think of for now,
thanks for any and all help

mark

Posted by: azamuner

Hey Mark. Welcome to RMP. Sorry I cannot answer all of your questions but I can shed some light on a few.

1.) Elena's Models is the one you will hear the most for being reputable.

4.) If you live in a small town, you'll have better luck trying to meet a woman from a small town. People from a big city may not adjust well to smalltown living.

5.) Americans, Canadians and Europeans are welcome there from my experience...although it is limited.

7.) The people who work there speak English although you'll find the average person does not. In Odessa there were dozens of people crowding the exit and trying to give you a ride or a room. Be careful. You'd be much better off to have a pick up service that will take you to your hotel/apt.

8.) I'd say you're probably ok in the age range as long as you have things in common. Around 10 years is the max I would go but you are close enough to that.

10.) I would try not to mention anything of a sexual nature. Also don't speak about your past relationships if you can avoid it.

11.) There are Internet cafes everywhere so I don't see why they wouldn't have their own email address. As for having a home PC, well the 2% figure might be accurate.

I'm sure some other members can fill in the rest or add to my comments.

Posted by: Seaview

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(11) with only 2% of people in the ukraine having e-mail how do they respond to me?

Usually they write their letters on special ukranian papyrus, put them into bottles and float them across the Atlantic ocean but with only 2% people in the US able to read ukranian papyrus poor girls never get the answer, actually

It gets especially stressful because 1% of those 2% able to read ukranian papyrus constantly mix up Ukraine with Uganda when they send the bottles with their answers back by DHL.

Unfortunately, this is not a surprise for humanity because if Mr Bush doesn't see any difference between Austria and Australia, why other americans should care....

Sorry, mate, but you should really learn some basic things about the Ukraine and FSU before looking for love there. 2% people in the Ukraine having email sounds ridiculous.

Posted by: Algol

Here are my answers!!!

(2) Yes, somewhat. If you expect her to be a size 2 or 4 then you should start working on yourself. Besides, you will have alot more energy (and you will need it)

(4) I agree with the earlier response. Try to meet a lady from a village.

(5) I always fell very welcome from the people of Ukraine - even stranges.

(6) If you trust the lady you are going to see - she should find an appartment for you. Don't pay more that $30/day. Other than that you only need to book your flight. Take a few presents and cash and you will be fine. I would say $100/day is more than enough.

(7) Again, you lady should meet you at the airport. There are always plenty of English speaking travelers and lots of signs in English. Worry not.

(8) Again 10 years is max. My difference is 9.

(9) Sex is sex. It happens more naturally there. What will happen will happen. My advise - be prepared.

(10) It's typical. The ladies are writing to several guys just like you are writing to several women. If something better comes along in the early stages - well....move on.

(11) I would bet that only 2% have in internet connect in their homes. Only 1 person that I have met is actually connected via dial up in their home. However, internet cafes & businesses with connections are readily available. Mainly women send email from their work or join dating services.

(12) I'm 5'8 & bald I guess you could consider that short. I was 150 but have gain 10 pounds in 6 yrs due to her cooking. Yes, she is a hottie. The deal is that men from developed countries can offer oportunities that life can not offer in Ukraine. Also, not all but many men in FSU have lost respect for women. The stories I hear from my wife still shock & amaze me. Anyway - if you are always truthful, faithful, and put her needs first, you will be rewarded 10 fold.
Good luck.

Posted by: mark38668

you guy's really helped me out alot thanks to all,and god bless

Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

you guy's really helped me out alot thanks to all,and god bless

This path absolutely demands you be 100% committed to the process.
Part of that process is dong as much homework and studying as you can.
This site will offer a lot of information as you go through it. It will also open other doors for learning more. Be diligent and devote yourself to learning as much as you can.
As for ladies... I have nothing! They are a mystery wherever you go.
My belief is to always behave as gentlemanly as you are able. You can't go wrong being courteous, respectful and treating a lady like a lady.
Good luck!

And don't forget to recycle the bottles with your papyrus messages from Ukraine! LOL

Posted by: disculmawsu

While I am not looking for a Russian or Ukrainian wife, I met a few Russian women in Moscow while studying Russian and exploring Russian culture (and Ukrainians women while vacationing in Ukraine afterward). I recommend studying either Ukrainian or Russian before going - depending on which language the woman speaks (the women seemed very impressed by my attempts at Russian and were eager to coach me). I would suggest a survey of the history of Ukraine or Russia (once again depending on the ethnic background of the woman you are interested in - it very important to know the ethnic background of the woman because many Ukrainians have a different view of history than Russians in Ukraine). Many Ukrainian women (and men) were also impressed by my knowledge of Ukrainian history (in Kyiv a basic knowledge of the legends of founding of Kyiv seemed to impress the ladies). If the woman is of Russian descendt learn a little about Pushkin. I would encourage you watch a few classic Soviet films - Moscow Doesn't Beblieve in Tears and Irony of Fate (or enjoy your bath) come mind (and are available through Netflix).
Of course, I am not nearly as knowledge about dating Russian or Ukrainian women, but having a background in Russian history and culture seemed to make me more interesting to them than average American they may have encountered.

Posted by: joelunchbox

I don't know if this will happen to you but when I started this dating stuff again-after 18 years of marriage-I found myself looking at the same age that I had last dated! haha I think Freud was right about a lot of things...
My advice is to sit down and get to know yourself. What are you looking for? Kids? be upfront and honest about it personally, I learned that the looks department is not that important--and I tend to be a little more focused on looks than I care to admit. The truth is: many people are not photogenic...case in point, the girl I am engaged to...her christmas photo taken by the flower guy was horrific!! If I had gone on that photo, I would not have met a wonderful person who is very attractive to boot. Most photos add about ten pounds!! Don't sweat the looks, figure out what is important to you. You and I both need to lose weight..you are honest about it. Any good woman will want you to be healthy and lose the weight. The good news is, most FSU women are pretty health conscious, so the more you stay around them, the healthier you are. don't rush, try to find a penpal maybe first. Although I didn't meet my girl at luckylovers.net it is a good site and I wrote several nice, real ladies. Good luck.

Posted by: EasyTarget

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(1) what site would you say was the best? im using one now that charges for every e-mail.

several people like Elena's Models, freepersonals.ru or allsinglerussiangirls.com
I don't think it is rude to ask for the woman's personal email address after the first or second email. Normally I just put my personal email address at the bottom of the email. And most of the time the woman will reply to my personal email. Not always but most of the time.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(2) im about 40 lb's over weight will that hurt my changes with the women?

Does it hurt with your chances with women in your hometown? You are a tall guy and some woman may find it intimidating and some will find it attractive. But if you want to lose weight, create a plan for yourself and do something about it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(3) iv heard when you go on a tour you have 100's of laide's to choose from? just point one out!!! surely this is not true?

I would advise against the tour route. I am sure there are some success stories but what are the odds? Some of the women attending are professional daters, some come for the free food and drinks, and some are serious. It is difficult to sort out who's who in a few days.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(4) i live in a small town in mississippi doesnt that really hurt me as well?

Well if a woman lived in New York City her whole life there is a small chance she would want to move to Senatobia, Mississippi. Granted you are not too far from Memphis. If you met and married the right woman would you consider moving a little bit north to Memphis?
Just a side note, I would not say you are from the country or a village or something like this. Woman from the FSU (former Soviet Union) tend to equate country and village with no running water, limited electricity, etc...

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(5) are people from the united states welcome in the ukraine?

Just don't be obnoxious and you can make friends anywhere. :-)

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(6) if i were to go to the ukraine should i book every thing with the site im on or here in the u.s ?

Depends really. if and when you decide to plan a trip, ask for some more advice. If your visiting a major city in Ukraine you will most likely be able to arrange things yourself.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(7) not being able to speak the languauge how would one even get out of the
air port?

Through the doors, like everyone else. j/k It seems that most people arrange for someone to pick them up at the airport in advance. Think airport shuttle service, again when you get to the point of making a trip ask for some more advice.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(8) iv been talking to a lady for about two weeks now...well im 37 and she's 26 too much age diff.????? hope not

She could be 1 year younger then you and not be at your maturity level. And she can be 10 years younger then you and be more mature then yourself. It is hard to say. I would concentrate on compability versus age.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(9) what about there attitudes about sex? iv heard nothing on this matter.

Pretty sure they have sex in FSU. Although I would not talk about the subject matter until you have met her in person.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(10) after 3 or 4 letter's i seem to loose the lady.any do's and dont's as far as my letter's?

hard to say. It is difficult to keep a person engaged if there is not enough compability. I would hesitate to guess that you have done all the small talk in the first couple of letters and you and her don't really know what to say. It usually takes a few more letters before you can develop a rapport and talk about day to day life. When communicating in a foreign conversation it can be difficult to push the conversation. My suggestion, always ask one or two questions and then it will be easier for her to know what to write.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(11) with only 2% of people in the ukraine having e-mail how do they respond to me?

2% number seems really low. I don't know where you read that, it is most likely very out dated number. Almost all women who have signed up for a dating site have a personal email address. Either they will use the agency, work computer, or internet cafe. A smaller percentage will have computers at home.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(12) im 6 foot 4 and 260 lb's...whats with theses pictures of these short,bald,very over weight men marrying these model quality women? hope that wasnt a rude question!!!!

Do you really believe every piece of advertising you see? If so have I got a bridge to sell you. :-)
Of course they are going to try and portray that just because you are a foreigner you can met and marry a beautiful woman. Reality -- not so much. Yes there are some cases of someone dating out of their league. But the exception and not the norm.
If you are a 5, you will be able to date a 6 or 7. Not because you are an American but because your a nice guy who knows how to treat a woman right.
Just my $0.02

Posted by: Tatysik

Hi Mark!
My name is Tanya. I'm from Ukraine. As I understand right you are going to go to Ukraine... Welcome :-) Most Ukranianians are very hospitable people. When my husband Mike (AkMike)tells about his trip to Ukraine he is always saying of my friends, "They treated me like a king". Don't worry about it. You'll feel very welcome. Besides, our Ukranian President Victor Yushchenko has Amarican wife. Originally she is from Chicago.
At airport almost every airline crew speaks English. And actually in Ukraine maybe each 5th person speaks english a little bit. And you always can find a people who speaks english very well.
It is not true that only 2% of people have internet. Some of people have internet at their work, some of them use internet clubs. I mean people who want to communicate can communicate. Where there is a will there is a way!
You have to understand that people are all different and it's not dependant of nationality. Not all are good, not all are bad. They are just people.
And you really should to realize what do you want to have: supermodel, friend, just person to talk to, wife to take care of you?
Since you're overweight is not the best, and I would be rather careful if some models will pay attantion to you, because Ukrainian like to be in good shape, especialy women.
Take it slow, be sure of your choices. Letters are good but personal meetings are better. Get to know her some thru the internet, then meet her in person to get to know her as a real person. But still doesn't work sometimes. Same thing with a big differance in age. For some reason marriage works for 3-5 years with a big difference in age... Just today I've heard bad news from my friend here in Ak, they do have problems because of big difference of age. Closer to your age is better I think. My husband is 4 years older than I am. It works good!(so far!!)

If you interested you can read our story with Mike I wrote in the RMP. It's title is "An Ukranian Lady Advantures in Love", mayby it will help.
http://russianmeetingplace.com/foru...read.php?t=5328

Anyway I wish you good luck :-)
Tanya.

Posted by: GoeastLJ

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

hello all im mark and new to the group,i need lot's of help with this whole dating thing,im 37 was married for 17 years that marriage ended 2005.

Hi Mark,

Welcome...again! A bit of deja vu, because I remember your post from last year:

Mark38668
New Member

Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 4
Country:

hi to all !!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

im new to all this and it was my understanding,that the word sex in Russia
was something that one would never say,i mean i no porn is a very big
here in the U.S but ,i thought that russia was nothing like that, as far as ,
sex,porn and ect.but look's like i was very wrong?
can someone help me understand this better?

So, are these genuine questions or are you doing some research? May be you have not posted for some time but you are certainly not new!

I think people on this forum are very willing to help those that are really looking for help.

Posted by: Balaklava

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seaview

BRAVO! BRAVO! BRAVISSIMO!

Yes, I'm one of them and do the same way.

Posted by: ham

Quote:

1% of those 2% able to read ukranian papyrus constantly mix up Ukraine with Uganda when they send the bottles with their answers back by DHL.

tell that to women...there was trouble days ago at the MOB fan club.
Pedro, truck driver, 56 was upset because his teenaged beauty pageant wrote him she loves szechuan soup & almond eyes; Leroy, bar tender, 49 was besides himself because he wouldn't exactly "love" attending a KKK rally, play banjo all day and listening to Tom Metzger live the way Irinka would; Barney, farmer, 61 is a rude but well-meaning far-right survivalist and being told she loves "you savage boys of Africa" cast aspersions on his image of her.
All are writing Irinka, 19 yo beauty pageant.

Hell...

It turned out Irinka's bulk mailer was poorly configured and swapped the tags...

Posted by: ham

Quote:

(2) im about 40 lb's over weight will that hurt my changes with the women?

well, be real with yourself first. Are you chasing a Britney Spears look-alike? Would such one go to bed with you in your city? If not, ask yourself why.

Quote:

(3) iv heard when you go on a tour you have 100's of laide's to choose from? just point one out!!! surely this is not true?

it might be true but remember most socials are like your domestic pub scene and women are recruited through "free food & drink event " ads, hence lots of prostitutes, novelty seekers etc.

Quote:

(12) im 6 foot 4 and 260 lb's...whats with theses pictures of these short,bald,very over weight men marrying these model quality women? hope that wasnt a rude question!!!!

yellow pages under D as "divorce lawyers"...or simply a sex tour for him & a new fur coat (or whatever) for her...

Quote:

(10) after 3 or 4 letter's i seem to loose the lady.any do's and dont's as far as my letter's?

you might not be Longfellow BUT the WWW/LD dating scene is very undependable...she is probably writing eleventeen other men, and growing tired because none ever visits...then you have scammers etc.

Posted by: goforit

Quote:

Originally Posted by Algol

Here are my answers!!!

(12) I'm 5'8 & bald I guess you could consider that short. I was 150 but have gain 10 pounds in 6 yrs due to her cooking. Yes, she is a hottie. The deal is that men from developed countries can offer oportunities that life can not offer in Ukraine.

From my limited experience I would say that may be true of the Ukraine, but it is certainly NOT true of Russia, especially in the bigger cities. In fact I'm becoming more and more convinced that women from Moscow and St. Petersburg have for the most part adopted attitudes that are very similiar ro American women. I hope I am wrong but that is the impression I am getting.

Posted by: Manchester

PM would not accept my reply as it was too long!

I prefer not to answer you in public.......

I am an English guy married to a Russian girl, she has a small site al ladagirl.com

(1) what site would you say was the best? im using one now that charges for every e-mail.

No site is best. Choose one where you get direct contact info and dont pay per contact.

(2) im about 40 lb's over weight will that hurt my changes with the women?

Arent we all? lol, I am not a slim dude but my wife is slim and gorgeous!

(3) iv heard when you go on a tour you have 100's of laide's to choose from? just point one out!!! surely this is not true?

Avoid tours, men dont meet wives there!

(4) i live in a small town in mississippi doesnt that really hurt me as well?

Yes and no. If you are honest about it, and your town, you will attract women who are OK with small town life.

(5) are people from the united states welcome in the ukraine?

yanks have detractors anywhere, but generally you will be OK.

(6) if i were to go to the ukraine should i book every thing with the site im on or here in the u.s ?

Check all prices, if you tell me where , I will give you links. Probably better to do it yourself.

(7) not being able to speak the languauge how would one even get out of the
air port?

Again, it depends where, maybe you need a guide, we only operate in Russia but know a couple of guys in Ukraine we could recommend.

(8) iv been talking to a lady for about two weeks now...well im 37 and she's 26 too much age diff.????? hope not

11 years, thats *JUST* OK, talking as in phone?

(9) what about there attitudes about sex? iv heard nothing on this matter.

Much the same. When she wants it you will know!

(10) after 3 or 4 letter's i seem to loose the lady.any do's and dont's as far as my letter's?

My wife will advise you on this if you e mail her!

(11) with only 2% of people in the ukraine having e-mail how do they respond to me?

Women in foreign facing agencies mostly have e mail. If not they have tel numbers.

(12) im 6 foot 4 and 260 lb's...whats with theses pictures of these short,bald,very over weight men marrying these model quality women? hope that wasnt a rude question!!!!

yeah, Little fat guys with smokinhotkovas! I know! I am over weight but 6'3" (my wife is half my weight) but I always did OK in the FSU and in England for that matter.

I have PMd you contact info........

Posted by: jeffs

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(1) what site would you say was the best? im using one now that charges for every e-mail.

I can�t recommend a site, but also try meetring through non-traditional ways.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(2) im about 40 lb's over weight will that hurt my changes with the women?

No, Nix, Nine, Nada.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(3) iv heard when you go on a tour you have 100's of laide's to choose from? just point one out!!! surely this is not true?

Never been on a tour, that sounds more like a brothel.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(4) i live in a small town in mississippi doesnt that really hurt me as well?

Depends on the girl, how far from a city? Might be better to stay away from gals from the big cities.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(5) are people from the united states welcome in the ukraine?

There is no requirement for a Visa (Welcome!), it�s not going to be like home with peop[le waving, smiling or even slowing down to avoid running you over in their car.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(6) if i were to go to the ukraine should i book every thing with the site im on or here in the u.s ?

Don�t know what site you are on, look around a bit, also check the forums, you may find better deals.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(7) not being able to speak the languauge how would one even get out of the
air port?

If you rent an apartment (some hotels too) will offer a service to pick you up.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(8) iv been talking to a lady for about two weeks now...well im 37 and she's 26 too much age diff.????? hope not

Not really. It happens in the states, it can happen there.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(9) what about there attitudes about sex? iv heard nothing on this matter.

Each girl is different I suppose, but I don�t buy this tripe about being pure and pristine. Remember the Ukraine brought you the group Via Gra. Look at the advertisements. In my time in Russia people easily discussed sex� especially if she is in her 20�s.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(10) after 3 or 4 letter's i seem to loose the lady.any do's and dont's as far as my letter's?

Do be yourself, Don�t get a girl trying to be someone else, don�t think that you are saving her from a live of abject poverty and misery.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(11) with only 2% of people in the ukraine having e-mail how do they respond to me?

Where did you get such a silly statistic?

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark38668

(12) im 6 foot 4 and 260 lb's...whats with theses pictures of these short,bald,very over weight men marrying these model quality women? hope that wasnt a rude question!!!!

That�s a good question� ask them.