How serious would you view lying about age? - Russian Ukrainian Belarus Travel Music Woman Dating News

	The Russian Meeting Place: A place to meet people and talk about all things Russian... International Discussions about Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, Travel, Music, Russian News, Ukrainian culture, Belarusian Dating, Moscow, Saint Petersburg, Kiev and other intelligent topics about life in the former Soviet Union.

Pages: 1

How serious would you view lying about age?
(Click here to view the original thread with full colors/images)

Posted by: GoeastLJ

I ask this question because 2 of the ladies I communicated with did not tell the whole truth about how old they really were. One said she was 37, but she turned out to be 49! The other was only 4 years out - 39 instead of the 43 she was. Both these ladies were on Elenas Models and I know that their profiles are still active there.

Posted by: solstice

How many women "ever" tell their real age? Age to me is not a big issue, personally I feel younger inside than the figures indicate. What troubles me is, and I've found this most often on dating websites here in the US, is meeting people who post pictures taken years ago. I've had instances where I would never have recognized the person I was to meet if they had not come up to me and introduced themselves.

Posted by: GentleGiant

Me too, and don't forget chest size, when I joined a UK site early last year, there was not a single woman who claimed to have less than a "D" cup.

To be fair, I have not run into anyone falsely claiming to be younger than they really are yet, just the opposite; I have had several claim to be in their 30's who do not look a day over 16.
It takes a bit of fiddling to get an old photo posted onto Elena's, they read the date stamp built into the jpeg by any digital camera; I had one refused that was only 6 months old because the camera had defaulted to 2001 after I dropped it; I had to edit the photo and save it under a new name to get a fresh date stamp and re-enter it.
Elena's also seem a little retarded when it comes to updating someones age, I know of several women I wrote to early last year who's age has not changed according to the website; one of them is nearly 38 but the site still says 35.

Posted by: j_c

Quote:

Originally Posted by GentleGiant2

Me too, and don't forget chest size, when I joined a UK site early last year, there was not a single woman who claimed to have less than a "D" cup.

Are you serious?? You can enter cup size as a search criteria??? LMAO!!!

What site was this?

JC

Posted by: Seaview

Women are touchy on their age especially in Russia. Most glossy magazines advise to hide real age. It's a very bad manner in Russia , BTW, to ask a woman "how old are you?". You'll get a strange look and an answer like "Can you guess?" or "definitely over 18".

When colleagues congratulate a woman in her twenties (not to mention 30s or 40s) on her birthday they usually say : oh, you are 18 finally. Lovely! or It's you 18th birthday again, isn't it?

I think it's a usual thing on dating sites to lie about age. I would advise to be indulgent or to get somehow her real recent picture so that you could really understand the pic was taken a month ago or something like that.

I was stupid enough to lie about my age myself ( said I was 3 years younger than I am) and when I had to to reveal my real age I felt like a complete idiot, like twenty complete idiots. I had never been so ashamed in my life. I'll never do that again but this is how it happens

Anyway it's better to lie about age and send him cool recent pics than not to lie about age and send him pics from your graduation party

Posted by: ham

is a "white" lie a lie...?
When does its shade become dark enough to become truly suspicious...?
wouldn't we all want to look just the right way, weigh the right weight and all...?

I don't know, but the habit of white lies (or not-so-white ) might very well be the tip of the iceberg...like kleptomania or dypsomania...an alcoholist will rarely see his problem for what it really is...but in THAT case, it might be his problem & his alone.

There are so many blind spots in a WWW/DL relationship that making room for lies or misrepresentation, which in some case might even appear so "cute", is a recipe for disaster in my opinion.

Posted by: OzGuyLooking

I myself have difficulty with people lying about basic things such as age. To me if they are willing to lie about something basic what are they willing to do when it comes crunch time.

On the other hand I have a friend, and know many other guys, who don't see it as a bad thing and they move on with life.

Basically it is up to the individual how they feel about it and how they handle it.

Posted by: royalpalace774

For me if a girl lied about her age and I met her in person & we hit it off & she looked good I don't think it would bother me. ON the other hand if she lied about her age and we met in person and she looked much older I might have a problem with that.

I have many friends that are women and everyone of them lies about their age. These are friends of mine that are close to me like if they were my sister. And they look great no matter ho old they tell you they are.

I have one friend , she is 39 and every time we go to a nightclub they card her because they don't believe she is old enough to get in. She is 39. They think she is 18.

Posted by: GoeastLJ

Quote:

Originally Posted by GentleGiant2

It takes a bit of fiddling to get an old photo posted onto Elena's, they read the date stamp built into the jpeg by any digital camera; I had one refused that was only 6 months old because the camera had defaulted to 2001 after I dropped it; I had to edit the photo and save it under a new name to get a fresh date stamp and re-enter it.

I have seen photos that have been scanned from the conventional pictures.

Well, age is just a number, but it may be more than that to those that expect to have children. I understand the odds of having birth complications increase with age, and exponentially so after 35.

Posted by: EasyTarget

Lies ~ if they are lies ~ about age are hard to know. Some websites don't automatically update the womans age when she registered. She may have made a typo when filling out her profile. Sometimes she states her age in the introduction letter that was created 2 years ago.

I am not too concerned with a woman's age. If I ask a woman what her age is when I am at a bar, I don't expect to get a straight answer. However if I ask her directly what is your age and she mis-states it, then I would have some trust issues. Since if she is willing to deceive you about her age; what else will she be deceptive about?

Posted by: subcom117

Age may not matter since physical age my differ from chronological age. But lying does matter. And if one will lie about age, what else will one lie about?

I think any serious relationship requires the two to be totally honest with each other. So if someone is willing to lie about the little things early on, I would highly suspect of their truthfulness in the future.

Posted by: Longfellow

To say 'lie' infers intention to deceive.

Now every site i've ever posted on asked my date of birth and calculated my age as well as keeping it current (well not here, but you guys don't care if I'm 35 or 65, beautiful or hideous - I hope! LOL)

There is also the question of motive... I admit that I have Photoshoped some blemishes from posted photos (not to post Brad Pitt but the raging volcano on my cheek won't still be there if I meet her).
We all put our best face forward. For women, they place a much greater value on their own age than perhaps we do. And generally these girls look good.
I have accounts on 2 major American dating sites, and women of 45 look 45 or older, not to mention the old photos or those so glamoured that the woman who arrived at the cafe was a stranger to the photo.
Not so with FSU women I see, who take great pride in their appearance, not only facial but body.
On American sites, I find it impossible to believe that some women are willing to show themself looking so badly. Apparently the belief of the golden uterus is very strong here... with one of these I can get all of those I want.
Well, count me out.
Age is just a number, but if you believe that a woman is intentionally deceiving to get your attention as a start, I would flag it to be watched.
As said previously, if she is willing to lie about the unimportant it doesn't bode well for the overall moral value when it really is important.

Posted by: ham

Quote:

Anyway it's better to lie about age and send him cool recent pics than not to lie about age and send him pics from your graduation party

Well, that may be a way of looking at it.
After all, one might look much older that he is in reality.

However, i never condone lies or misrepresentation.
I am simply convinced it'll come back to haunt you sooner than later.
Simply state the truth.

There are deep psychological aspects involved. Research shows that many compulsive liars do think they are going to improve, EG lose these 50 extra pounds or regrow hair or get their impotence treated or...

but sadly we are not allowed to pupate into gay cover models...so there we go.
I am against excessive embellishment as well...
Say one is a farmer pants, corn liquor, belching kind of long bearded hillbilly raising pigs & goats in the middle of nowhere for a living, and perhaps loving it.
He might trim his bear, get a shower, dress in tuxedo...what for?

As i said elsewhere, i know in person many compulsive liars.
Some do it to impress; some to hide painful or a-typical personal situations...they are worms telling everyone how they pupated into beautiful butterflies...

And most of them invest considerable resources into their phantasy...
Sadly enough, most people around do know part (or most, or all ) of their "secrets", EG people claiming to be managers but in reality working in a basement "unofficially" while on welfare...and they will tell you where they work, the color of furniture there, whether yesterday it was good or bad weather in that city, their pay scale...but expects these countless details to change at whim following the fading grasp of their memory...did i tell you i had 5 millions in my bank account or was it 3? Did i tell you it was my great- grandfather digging gold in Yukon, right?

Oh right, now i remember...
My grandfather stole the nazi's gold...

Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoeastLJ

I ask this question because 2 of the ladies I communicated with did not tell the whole truth about how old they really were. One said she was 37, but she turned out to be 49! The other was only 4 years out - 39 instead of the 43 she was. Both these ladies were on Elenas Models and I know that their profiles are still active there.

To me lying is lying is lying.... I have no idea if they had lied to me, but I will say that the one that I am working a visa did not... she told me her age and I told her mine...

And one who says she is 37 but really is 49 will get a rude awakening IMO... if that turned up on a visa process (which it will), end of story... how could I trust anything else you say if you do not even give your true age... now, if she fessed up on the second or third letter... well, that is different...

Sorry Seaview, even 3 years is a lie that you should not go down...

Posted by: Spakoyna

My wife is talking to me now! Many women lie about their age because they are tired of being pursued by men too old! She says most would rather meet someone closer to their age!(seems once they pass 40 they are only approached by men in their late 50's up) My wife lied a little! 2 years....I discovered on my 1st visit. She also says it is not right to post old pictures...but if you look younger than you are there is no problem! My wife will soon be 47....most give her early 30's at best!

Posted by: Longfellow

Try this on...

I'm celebrating 28 years.
(28th anniversary of my 18th birthday!)
Am I a liar or a creative youth lover? LOL

Posted by: GoeastLJ

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spakoyna

This is exactly what I heard. According to most (well, some) FSU women, Western men in their 40s look for FSU women in their 20s and those men in their 50s look for women in the 30s. For a woman in her 40s to get someone near to her age, she must pretend to be in the 30s. Most of them own up during the first meeting and they hope that the man will forget about the age issue once he sees the woman. These women are trying to avoid appealing only to men who are probably already in the retirement homes.

I, too, always have a problem when people stretch the truth - or develop selective amnesia and fail to disclose some import bits of information. Does the outcome justify the means?

PS. I was killing myself laughing at Ham's farmer! Excellent!

"Say one is a farmer pants, corn liquor, belching kind of long bearded hillbilly raising pigs & goats in the middle of nowhere for a living, and perhaps loving it." The equivalent of the begging, bearded, cider drinking lot. But I am sure the world is richer for characters like this?

Posted by: Longfellow

It's true, Ham has a way of cutting through the BS and saying plain what we all think on a level.

I also had a good laugh at his directly pointed post. It displays good humor and real insight. And I don't think i've ever heard someone use pupate in a sentence before (except myself, and my colleagues always remind me to speak in known English!)
Ham, you make a good sandwich!!

Posted by: ham

AS POSTED ELSEWHERE:

Quote:

Maybe I am way
off base asking her to give me more information to verify that she
is who she says she is? After all, she never asked for money?
I did a false thing myself. I posted the only pictures that I had
of myself which were taken seven years ago. I was very buff and I
am not now. I'm like 85lbs heavier. I was going to the website
to meet vegetarian friends to get on a vegan diet like I used to be
on back when I was skinny. So am I the scammer or her?

The same clown in a later post continued about himself:

Quote:

I have over 100 clients that are some of the world's wealthiest
people and though some of them have found a way to riches, the
intellegent of the group are humble and well mannered.
It makes no difference how much money one makes as to his or her
value. I'd stack up my earnings against your's any day.
Better yet, I stack up some of my friends earnings as well.
Having the capacity to earn alot of money is easy.
Always has been for me. Taking the time to face one's insecurities
and thereby learning to be a better person is not so easy.
(...)
But I used to think like you and I tired of the Yachts and champagne.
It was a shallow existance of physical pleasure that I lost interest
in.

what phoneys you ever "meet" online!
So he got millions and hangs out with VIPs and tired of yachts and champagne... but is trolling for dates online and sends old or fake pictures of himself...?
Can we spot the trend here?

Posted by: GoingToRussia

Both RW I was invovled with subtracted 2 years from their actual age. I was happy to know our age difference was 8 years and not 10 years. They told me their real age very early into the relationship.

Posted by: Big wheel

IMO lying is lying.There are somethings that are better left unsaid until the right time but age should be right out there.

Posted by: yoron

Hmm, i don't really know what to say, but hey, i'll say it just the same

Age is ok as long as you're under ? Let's say forty six - seven something.
But when you're catering for a girl and face it guys, we first go for looks, then you might not want the first thing to be said to be about age differences. Especially if you gone 'over the hill' somewhat.
You might want her to meet you first right

Girls on the other hand seems to want to be seen as older when young and younger when old

So my well thought over advice is to make sure that it's her that relocates, not you (as that will give you a better chance to come clean too

Awh:

)