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What is a "good Marriage"?
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Posted by: spamer

As I think about it, what is a "good" marriage? What is a "good man" or a "good woman"? I know this sound stupid, but I have been reading comments and I see "good man/woman" in them and then I read a different view point. Of course a Russian view points are needed to help me understand this better.

This is why I am getting confused:
My parents have been married for 58 years. They have been living in different bed rooms for 22 years. When I tease my father when he gets mad and tell him he needs some sex, his reply is "do they still do that now days"?

My grandparents were married for 67 years. All I remember my grandfather saying to me was "never get married" they drive you nuts and are a waste of time. When I ask him why don't you get a divorce if you hate grandma so much? He would say "it's a catholic thing"

Knowing this I wouldn't say they had a "good marriage" but they did have a "long marriage". I do see couple in there 70's walking around town holding hands and I think wow, they're happy. Later to fine out yes they are happy, because they are dating.

So you see why I need a little help. I really don't have much in my life to judge this on.

Posted by: rtking

I think a "good marriage" really depends on the people in question. Some people I know are very independent and enjoy having someone in their life occassionally and are perfectly happy to have a wife or husband that has their own life. I have other friends who are labeled "co-dependent" and like having someone around all the time.

I think, at least for me, a good marriage begins with two people who mesh together in personality as well as emotionally. They are two people who have similar values and traits. There isn't significant conflict to overcome and neither is incredibly stubborn and unrelenting. I think the perfect relationship (leading up to marriage) entails a lot of compromise, respect, understanding, trust and communication.

Of course, that's my $0.02 (or in Byellorussian Rubles, that's $43.2 rubles)

Bob K.

Posted by: campanula

IMHO

I think no one knows the right answers on this question…
What is a good marriage? What is love? The same hard question as what is life?But, anyway…

I think that marriage is like a school… From the first date till the last day, we are studying this science… The bad and/or good experience makes us wiser (some of us, surely

)…

My parents live together more than 40 years, and I can’t say that it was a good marriage… When they were younger I thought that my mother made a big mistake when she said YES to my father. But now, 40 years later, they are just a great couple…

We have saying in Russian: If you’ll get a divorce, then, when you get old, you’ll not have anyone even to quarrel with.