|
Originally Posted by freebird
Spakonya are you talking about the russian side of this site or the RW sites in general? What seem to be the discussions there? That WM are just players, scammers, perverts etc? Or is there more? (I really wish I could read better) And are most of the RW on this site (in Russian language) married or single?
|
|
Originally Posted by Spakoyna
The specific incident I was referring to was here at RMP! The sight is quite slow...but the underlying tone is here as well.
My wife tells me all the crap that goes on. It simply amazes me! If men read and understood these sights many would have second thoughts about even pursing one of these lovely ladies! ! |
|
Originally Posted by inlove
Well, maybe they should. If Russian women are so full of crap, then why marry one?
|
|
Originally Posted by inlove
Well, maybe they should. If Russian women are so full of crap, then why marry one?
|
|
Originally Posted by freebird
I guess I am an idealist, I was hoping for my one and only? Now someone is going to tell me I am going to get hit by a truck? :0 :O
Ira, I think my concern was not that she would find a different me, I am very honest and dedicated in relationships, I think my concern was as Spakonya wrote about some poisonous ideas floating on the forum. Spakonya (and others) why do you think there is so much bad karma floating on the RW sites? Could it be because they have had some failures and disappointments and gravitate there to vent? |
It's no holes barred ...IE there are no rules!
|
Originally Posted by freebird
Hi everybody, I am just curious if it would be a good idea to reccomend the RW Russian-language forums to the girl I am writing to in Ukraine?
|
, antidate is enough for me
|
Originally Posted by Turboguy
If you are talking about getting her involved with sites like this I would say yes. Keep her as far away from Anti-Date as you can.
I will agree that if your gal is involved she does have a chance of getting into a cat fight once in a while with another RW. The other risk is that even on our sites there are some guys who can get nasty sometimes and when you see your gal get treated rudely or being put down by someone it can be a little unsettling. I could say one more negative but I will keep that to myself for the moment. |
|
Originally Posted by Turboguy
If you are talking about getting her involved with sites like this I would say yes. Keep her as far away from Anti-Date as you can.
I will agree that if your gal is involved she does have a chance of getting into a cat fight once in a while with another RW. The other risk is that even on our sites there are some guys who can get nasty sometimes and when you see your gal get treated rudely or being put down by someone it can be a little unsettling. I could say one more negative but I will keep that to myself for the moment. |
|
Originally Posted by freebird
???? Don't be shy might as well just tell us the whole story...
|
( btw his "story" would not be connected with antidate forum at all. ( like it could be seen from his post) He was not a member of it. Was his girl a member of antidate I don't know for sure) |
Originally Posted by freebird
No Ellen, I would not try to block it or anything, and I would not suggest try one site avoid another etc. I was thinking I might suggest she could look up this RW site on the internet, but then I read some posts here from guys saying the topics are often negative, so I thought I would ask what if people think it is a good idea. If not I would just not mention it, but if she found it anyways, so be it. I get the feeling she is busy at work so does not use the internet much. I know there was a thread that said they are discussing about how much money a man is supposed to spend, how good he is in bed etc. etc. so i hope when I come there she will not be comparing me to some idealized notion of WM
|
) Internet is just one of such place.|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Females discuss SUCH things any way and everywhere ( like males do that with women's boobs and legs
) Internet is just one of such place.But however she woul be busy at work she just must find a time to get information what like her new life would be abroad And truth tell I see no other sourse of such information except boards where women who already moved abroad share their experience (whatever that experinece could be and however much you males would like/dislike that experience) But at your place I'd just ask her if she tryes to get such information in order to have an idea about new life but not give her strick "instructions" where she is supposed to look for such information |
C'mon guys, what do you think? These women are children? They are big girls, they can figure it out for themselves. To my mind, trying to protect your relationship from some internet board is treating your lady as an idiot or a child at least. |
Originally Posted by I/O
Well, I'll be dammed...!! I never thought the day would come, but I agree with Ellen here 100%.
Your lady simply MUST be given access to as much information as is possible regarding any potential life abroad. If some nonsense written on an internet board is going to destroy your relationship, then the relationship was not based on solid ground in the first place. Excellent post Ellen, IMO you are spot on. Now please excuse me whilst I go away and recover from the shock....... C'mon guys, what do you think? These women are children? They are big girls, they can figure it out for themselves. To my mind, trying to protect your relationship from some internet board is treating your lady as an idiot or a child at least. Just because she speaks with an accent, don't for one minute think she thinks or reads or counts with an accent. |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Yeah he should tell the WHOLE story
( btw his "story" would not be connected with antidate forum at all. ( like it could be seen from his post) He was not a member of it. Was his girl a member of antidate I don't know for sure) |
|
Originally Posted by Cheburashka
What the heck is going on? I completely agree with I/O who agrees with Ellen, and I agree with Ellen also. And Bob is also in agreement with everyone? What is this board coming to? This is too bizarre. It might be some sort of a sign........
|
he he
| Females discuss SUCH things any way and everywhere ( like males do that with women's boobs and legs |
|
Originally Posted by ira156
Is has come to an end Cheb coz i agree too.....AGHHHHHH!!!!!!!
|
|
Originally Posted by deccie
Me too! i actually sent K the links to the Russian forums. She wasn't interested but that was her choice - not mine!
|
|
Originally Posted by freebird
Thanks for the opinion Zmejka.
Although I agree that most people will make up there own mind, if you have most of the people on a forum with a negative view, I think you can become a little more pessimistic. I know when I have read a few of the "marriage disaster" stories on this forum, it make me think a little more carefully about what I am doing. But then again that is not a bad thing. |
|
Originally Posted by Spakoyna
The specific incident I was referring to was here at RMP! The sight is quite slow...but the underlying tone is here as well.
My wife tells me all the crap that goes on. It simply amazes me! If men read and understood these sights many would have second thoughts about even pursing one of these lovely ladies! If you want to unleash the money-mongers and greencard women ideals on your soon to be....introduce her to the Russian Ladies Forums! Most recent (not here)...a woman was thinking her husband was cheap because the ring her husband bought her only cost 3K! The consensus seemed to be better than 50% that he was cheap! |
|
Originally Posted by Khashyar
Hi Everyone,
In fact, I just received an email from another Russian forum (that prided itself on having a free unmoderated approach to forums), and they are experiencing such a negative experience with flaming that many members left that forum and the forum admins had to send a mass email trying to ask members to return. So, no forum is perfect, but I know that MANY people have expressed to me how much they rely on the RMP, and how much the forum has helped them. Khashyar |
|
Originally Posted by EasyTarget
Khash: everyone owes you a big thanks for running the forum.
|
|
Originally Posted by EasyTarget
No forum is perfect. There is a wealth of information on RMP. When you get so many people together you are almost guaranteed to get people who dislike, disagree with each other. i do think the anonymity of the internet does allow some people to speak out, when otherwise they would bite their tongue.
Khash: everyone owes you a big thanks for running the forum. |
|
Originally Posted by Khashyar
While Americans enjoy personal freedom to create, express themselves, live the way they choose, the downside is a tendency not to feel responsbility for helping our neighbors, friends and family. You see this, for example, in some American parents pushing their kids out of the house on their own after their schooling is over. You might also see this in transient friendships in the U.S., for example.
Khashyar |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
If I tried to make some counclusions about American culture basing my opinion on my experence of dealing with people ( mostly males) at interner boards I would say that Americans are the most double-faced nation in the world who are sooooo enjoy to express themselves beind your back. Russian females could only envy an amount of rumores-gossips-bad mothings -etc wich is flying behinde curtains ( there is only famouse american smile on "surface" of course) at such boards among nobodyelse but "selected" honorous members. ( BTW australians ( and Britains) are famouse with that as well )
But as I'm optimist I don't transfer such my experience on the whole nation and still hold a hope that something there another type of american ( and "foreigner" in general) males does exist Cheers ![]() |
My wife has pretty much given up on trying to find a Russian friend here. |
Originally Posted by Spakoyna
Do American people gossip? Of course! But it is much more behind closed doors. Most American people who gossip intend for the gossip to remain behind closed doors. Most Russian Women who gossip seem to hope that door will be opened! Of course this is my opinion based on my experiences!
|
|
Originally Posted by Turboguy
Ellen, are you saying that Americans (and others) are the worst at telling others behind your back what an idiot they are and that Russians will just say it to thier face?
I am not sure how much of it goes on in Russia but yes, there is a lot of it goes on here. Probably from watching too many soap operas and trying to transpose that to real life. |
|
Originally Posted by Spakoyna
My wife will be the 1st to tell you that this is the way the majority of Russian women here in America are(and in Russia as well). The funny part is...it's not usually over a man...but just so one will look better than the other!...... I could go on and on...but many are repetitive. Now you take all this and amplify it 3 or 4 times and this is the picture I get from my wife of most Russian Women Forums. |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Of course it's your opinion based on your experience of dealing with RW who moved abroad ( from my opinion it's rather "specific" slice of Russian women population)
But if we speak about "culture" differences here then I'd prefer open "cat fight" vs "gossips" behinde not just "closed doors" but behind your back ( different cases If you get what I mean) Making by people who said nice things in your face pretending to be friendly persones is more hard thing to bear thnm gossips made by somebody who for sure "does not love us" |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Of course it's your opinion based on your experience of dealing with RW who moved abroad ( from my opinion it's rather "specific" slice of Russian women population)
But if we speak about "culture" differences here then I'd prefer open "cat fight" vs "gossips" behinde not just "closed doors" but behind your back ( different cases If you get what I mean) Making by people who said nice things in your face pretending to be friendly persones is more hard thing to bear thnm gossips made by somebody who for sure "does not love us" |
| I would say that Americans are the most double-faced nation in the world who are sooooo enjoy to express themselves beind your back. |
|
Originally Posted by Jerico
Well ELLEN if you have never been to America I dont see how you could come up with this thinking other than movies or these types of forums or something else.
Now I am not saying people dont talk behind your back here because they do but someone who never has been here to make such a claim is missinformed IMO. Of course I am not aware if you have been here or not. |
|
Originally Posted by Jerico
So Russian women seen to be just as sneaky or more talking behind peoples back.
I am by no means talking bad of them , just making a point is all. |
|
Originally Posted by Jerico
I was also told by my wife that many women in Russia cheat with married guys , it is normal. No big deal there. In fact the first woman I meet in Russia had a boyfriend before me that was indeed married , Heh.
I am sure it happens but just like it does here in the USA so I would not conclude from hearing this from my wife that ALL Russian women in general cheat with married guys. I could not say such a thing as it has not fact basis. Jerry |
|
Originally Posted by ira156
My experience is that men are much more simplistic than women and much more direct...for better or for worse.
|
|
Originally Posted by ira156
Its a little unfair of you to generalise all westerners by your experience of "meeting people" on these websites too....they are a very small percentage of the population of the relative countries...western or Russian and they are focused more on the dating/relationship scene.
|
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
One of points in my posts was that I met such behaviour among MALES - that "surprised" me the most.
Read my previouse post Sorry I'm too busy just now to repeat all what I said to another poster who failed to quote the whole my sentence. Any correction of my English grammar with that English variant for Russian "±Л" would be appreciated . Mark my mistake with red color in that my first sentence "If I tried to base my opinion on.... I would say...." wich made you to think about me making generalisation. |
|
Originally Posted by ira156
You are correct Ellen in the fact that you say "IF"....this does not mean that you base your opinion on having been to the US....only that the sole basis for your opinion is not only internet related.......So have you been to the US?? i havent so i would be interested.....i also gather by your reference to Aussies and Brits that you have also been to the UK and here.... where did you go did you like Australia??
|

|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Ok I continue with my English grammar tack instead of answering at your questions wich have nothing to do with my post
![]() What word combination did give you an idea that I BASE my opinion ? |

|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Well and what didn't you get from my that post ( wich was an answer to attempt of other poster to make a conclusion about Russian culture basing at his limitted experience? ) Why did you take into mind only "basing opinion" missing all those ifs-woulds-and pointing stright at a sourse of my hypothetical opinion wich I COULD base IF followED the same way like that poster did.?
I think I express my sarcasm rather clear - using all possible ways - grammar, mention only internet boards ( for purpose), posting that last words about my "hope" You guys for sure should make more eforts in understanding what have been said by others side or you would go not far if you can't get even such clear posts ![]() PS Truth tell last events at few other boards (which had an echo even at this very board) did sway my that hope in foreigners ( at least in those who are represented at dating scene) |
. I am having to good a day to argue...i will be in Moscow soon...who knows we may even have a coffee.....Cheers
|
Originally Posted by ira156
Well one thing is for sure Ellen...the English language can be very confusing and double faced in itself. I am very pleased to see that there may be some hope for us yet
. I am having to good a day to argue...i will be in Moscow soon...who knows we may even have a coffee.....Cheers |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Ah I do know how confusing English grammar could be for Russans. But I guess it's in vain to ask for corretion of my mistakes those who are supposed to know it well . I still don't know if what I studied in secondary school about those "if-would" was correct.
As for coffee then I warn you I did't use to pay in cafe - such a spoiled by Russian males woman I am. So I need a paper signed by you with your accepted obligation to pay for that coffee before I accept your invitation. It's one of my "culture misunderstanding" with foreigner males. Not that I'm not capable to do that by myself but it's just "a matter of principal". Aslo after those "events" I constatly reffered to last time I need a paper with your swearing not to cry at any corner in the Net how ugly I am if my face would not meet your high standarts for women's looks. That one I want to be signed by your blood . Without that - no coffee in my company. |
|
Originally Posted by ira156
My dear Ellen...i would never ask a woman for coffee if i didnt intend on paying....so you know have it writing and many witnesses. I can say i will see you as neither ugly or beautiful as i have been blinded in that depatment by my Nat....but im sure i will see you as interesting. Cheers
|
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
If I had not such "experiences" with foreigers I would not mention such things at all. So I now prefer to "warn" them with that Russian strightness which somebodies with gentle western psyche prefer to see like rudeness.
|

|
Originally Posted by Ellen
As for coffee then I warn you I did't use to pay in cafe - such a spoiled by Russian males woman I am. So I need a paper signed by you with your accepted obligation to pay for that coffee before I accept your invitation. It's one of my "culture misunderstanding" with foreigner males. Not that I'm not capable to do that by myself but it's just "a matter of principal".
Aslo after those "events" I constatly reffered to last time I need a paper with your swearing not to cry at any corner in the Net how ugly I am if my face would not meet your high standarts for women's looks. That one I want to be signed by your blood . Without that - no coffee in my company. |
|
Originally Posted by Cheburashka
OMG! This made me laugh out loud. We love you Ellen. You are an interesting person.
Ira, you are a true gentleman. |
|
Originally Posted by ira156
Ellen we have a saying in Australia....."i am big and ugly enough to look after myself".......i appreciated the directness of Russians i spoke to....another saying is " we dont like to beat about the bush" which means we also like to be direct. If i can let my Nat approve it i would like to have a coffe and conversation....maybe i can change your mind about at least some of us...but maybe i wont......
![]() |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Well we will see how you manage that ( if you get a chance of course)
. BTW my "issue" with foreigners I met and thank who my opinion about them dropped now was not in "conversation " _ It was very nice Surprise was in their actions later. I'm still lost in guesses what could caused such double-fased behaviour because there was neigther need nor "reason" for it. And it could not be "fun" in it as well because guys were rather "mentis" to have a fun in such things. So I made the only one conclusion - it was "culture" thing So I just don't put too many trust in nice conversations with foreigners now. PS I forgot to mention one little thing - I do not SPEAK English ![]() |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
So I just don't put too many trust in nice conversations with foreigners now.
|
|
Originally Posted by Cheburashka
We have a saying in America: "once bitten, twice shy". It means we can understand how one would lose trust in Americans after having a bad experience with Americans.
I pray that you will find people you can trust and have a great relationship with. There are plenty out there. |
|
Originally Posted by Cheburashka
We have a saying in America: "once bitten, twice shy". It means we can understand how one would lose trust in Americans after having a bad experience with Americans.
I pray that you will find people you can trust and have a great relationship with. There are plenty out there. |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
Yeah I know And I'm not "shy" Because dealing with foreigners, building trust in them or any "relationship" with them is not a goal of all my life at all, it's just a "hobby" in breaks in my job. It's just "events" I'm speaking about still cause an ripples in the water I still have to deal with that "ugly face" issue "here and there."
Ps I have seen those "bad" foreigners at THIS site as well ( but he was Australian but not American if I recall right) PS Wonder though how many cisterns of coffe should I drink with foreigners and how much it would cost for me to built that "trust" again? |
|
Originally Posted by ira156
I said id pay he he ![]() |
|
Originally Posted by Ellen
we will see. ( don't forget to bring the second paper)
|
|
Originally Posted by ira156
Bring the dagger Ellen you can draw the blood...he he
![]() |

|
Originally Posted by Ellen
what for? I have my canine teeth
![]() Ok I'm off to my job. If you make you mind about paying for my coffe in Moscow then we'l set a meeting. Bye till then |
Its a deal Ellen ......i will PM you when i know the dates and i have my Russian mobile number...the last one will have expired...have a good day at work
|
Originally Posted by inlove
I'm really sorry you formed this impression of Russian women. I understand that our personal experiences make a huge difference on how we perceive a certain group of people any time, but I would hope that at least your wife has met a decent Russian woman in her life at least once in a while.. Unfortunately, if Russian women you come accross in the US have arrived here as somebody's wives, they are most likely fit the description you've provided. Not all of them, of course, but a large percentage..
But there is a large number of Russians who came here to study and work professionally, and they are usually are more pleasant to deal with in my experience.. But they don't hang out on Russian Women forums, for sure.. |
My wife was attending ESL classes and an older lady was their from Moscow. My wife was happy to meet her. She was their visiting her daughter who immigrated through employment. They seemed to get along great. She wanted her to meet her daughter! Never came back to class after she brought up a meeting. Yeah I know what assume means....but one can only wonder!
|
Originally Posted by Spakoyna
We have not experienced what I am about to say. My wife has only met women casually(in a mall,restaurant,etc.) who have immigrated by means other than marriage. They do not seem to want to be sociable...almost like they don't want people to know their background.Here is the stereotype presented to us. Women who immigrate by means other than marriage think they are better than those who immigrate through marriage and do not wish to associate with women who immigrate through marriage. My wife has told me about this from her aquaintances at her agency. I was told about this through several channels. All I can say is those we do meet seem to try to distance themselves from us.
My wife was attending ESL classes and an older lady was their from Moscow. My wife was happy to meet her. She was their visiting her daughter who immigrated through employment. They seemed to get along great. She wanted her to meet her daughter! Never came back to class after she brought up a meeting. Yeah I know what assume means....but one can only wonder! |
|
Originally Posted by inlove
That's unfortunate. The women whom you've described in your previous post (the ones who behave badly) give a bad rep to the rest of "wives" as well as russian women in general. |
That is exactly how my wife feels about it too. She said quote "No wonder so many people think Russian Women are so easy".
|
Originally Posted by joelunchbox
I just finished re-reading this thread. Have we missed the common point here? That some women in various parts of the world gossip. Not all women but some. Not in one part of the world but everywhere. I would like to say that I see this behaviour in men also. Some men, in all parts of the world.
![]() I would like input on the following: If a woman has been treated with respect by her parents (and I personally think her father is a greater influence here) is she more or less disposed to gossip/backstab other ladies? |
|
Originally Posted by freebird
Hi everybody, I am just curious if it would be a good idea to reccomend the RW Russian-language forums to the girl I am writing to in Ukraine? I think it would be a great resourse if (hopefully) everything works out and she comes over here. But I wonder if she starts reading it before we meet will she get too much negative information? I have heard from a few guys that the russian language forums can have quite a few negative posters. I think that might refer to other sites, but i thought I would ask everyone. Hopefully this one is more positive about international marriages than "antidate" or somthing like that. But I have even seen some negative comments on this (English site), about age difference over 10 years is disgusting, too many men are not serious, etc etc. I can speak Russian but I cannot read well enough to understand written Russian, so I ask you all. I would like it if the woman I'm writing to learns more, but I hope she won't get a negative idea of the whole process.
Also, I would just like to say thanks to Khashyar & Lena (+ all the other moderators!) so this question is not meant to be disparaging in any way! I know if there are negative posts it is the thoughts of the poster, not the site. I hope those of you who have read the russian language site will give your opinion. ![]() |
|
Originally Posted by inlove
If Russian women are so full of crap, then why marry one?
|
|
Originally Posted by PrincetonLion
I always ask myself the same question...
![]() |
|
Originally Posted by inlove
Those are culture differences indeed. Russians in general are not very civil to each other, and don't make any effort to be. They don't see any virture in being polite, quite the opposite. Russian way to win an argument is to insult the opponent as much as possible, and come out on top.
The western way to deal with differences is to try to voice your opinion without insulting the opponent. At the end, the idea is to convince the other party that you are right without making them feel like a loser.. Does not work every time, but in ideal both parties will feel like they gained something out of the conversation.. As far as backstabbing goes, I have not noticed much of it going around in the western society. No more than in Russia, that's for sure.. If somebody does not like you, they will be polite to you, but quite cold. You will feel it, for sure.. There is no need to call somebody an idiot in their face, you can just ignore the guy, that's all. ![]() |
Russian Meeting Place Copyright ©2000 - 2008,
www.russianmeetingplace.com and Khahsyar and Lena.