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2 VERY NICE WOMEN TO CHOOSE FROM, NOW WHAT DO I DO?

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Posted by: neil277

where is your women tonight you cannot answer because you have been scammed



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by neil277
Look donut
He has been scammed thanks to www.russianmeetingplace.com

Even if you did have first-hand knowledge of the situation and were correct, do you really think the best way to offer advice and support to a person (the mission of RMP) is to throw insults and daggers at everyone? Share the pain, is that the idea?
Well done and mission accomplished, 'tovarich'!



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by neil277
RP

You have answered all my questions about this Ukraine ***** which i told you about and yes does she have a job or is she a lady of the night.

I'm not sad i just wanted to prove myself right and i did.

Mr Nick to you


You spelled your name wrong Nick. It begins with the 4th letter of the alphabet.



Posted by: Longfellow

RP-
He's just throwing out posts to get to 500. Apparently the ego-boost of a medal below his name is the greatest joy he can hope for in life right now. It's not sad, it's pitiful.



Posted by: neil277

Quote:
Originally Posted by Longfellow
Even if you did have first-hand knowledge of the situation and were correct, do you really think the best way to offer advice and support to a person (the mission of RMP) is to throw insults and daggers at everyone? Share the pain, is that the idea?
Well done and mission accomplished, 'tovarich'!


Giving advice is hard and you have to be hard in life so if i take money for translation work and don't tell the person that the person they are talking to is a scammer this is right?

But you take notice of this website???????????????????????????? who is right, i will never hurt a person and i always will help a person for no money.

Would this website do this.

Uncle Nick



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by neil277
Giving advice is hard and you have to be hard in life so if i take money for translation work and don't tell the person that the person they are talking to is a scammer this is right?

But you take notice of this website???????????????????????????? who is right, i will never hurt a person and i always will help a person for no money.

Would this website do this.

Uncle Nick


Nick, you keep spelling your name name wrong. It starts with a "D"



Posted by: neil277

Look RP

Worry about your life, i have sent you sms and if you need help i am willing to help, take the p.i.s.s and your on your own just like your future wife has told you to do.

Tonight i have told my truth and all things have been told.


Regards.

Nick



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by neil277
Look RP

Worry about your life, i have sent you sms and if you need help i am willing to help, take the p.i.s.s and your on your own just like your future wife has told you to do.

Tonight i have told my truth and all thins have been said.


Regards.

Nick


Ok , thanks for your concern!



Posted by: GoingToRussia

RP, don't listen to Neil277. He wants all men to fail with FSUW. He is negative and will only make you lose any hope for happiness. He is only noise ... don't listen. Proceed as you like because only you know the real story and curcumstances.

Good luck and I hope you find happiness.



Posted by: neil277

Quote:
Originally Posted by GoingToRussia
RP, don't listen to Neil277. He wants all men to fail with FSUW. He is negative and will only make you lose any hope for happiness. He is only noise ... don't listen. Proceed as you like because only you know the real story and curcumstances.

Good luck and I hope you find happiness.


Hello RP

You make your own choice but if this ***** has started out like this when you have paid all this money then you have to walk away or she will make your life hell, be strong and find a women who wants you for who you are, i did tell you that you made the wrong choice and i was right just like i told GTR he was with the wrong women.

Its time for the owners of this website to help people not just take money in donations, when you know someone is heading in the wrong direction you tell them, but the owners make out they believe in god but if you believe in God then God will always ask you to help. ( even when they are translating love letters they wont tell the person that this person is bad, ), would they do this if they were translating a document for a business)????

GTR you have made mistakes so you should know but i feel you are a sex tourist and you are doing to this girl what your first girl did to you, this is my last line on this subject and my last line on this forum, i have been proved right, the way to make money is to scam American men and how much have you given this women $ thousands i bet because thats the only way you can get sex GTR . $7000 PLUS FOR WHAT GOOD KISSES GROW UP.

RP you don't have to be rich to meet a women and NEVER give money away like you are doing and the job your lady has, go to the office and visit for your self without her when she is working.

Think before you spend your money a good honest women will never want money for taxi's home from work

The RW WAS DOING WELL BEFORE YOU MET HER AND SHE WILL BE DOING WELL AFTER YOU HAVE GONE AND IN RUSSIA NO COMPANY WILL ALLOW THIS MANY PEOPLE OFF AT ONE TIME.

My last visit, i have been proved right 3 times now but was slagged off to many times by silly American men who think showing money wins them the best women.

Regards.

Nick

She was doing fine before you



Posted by: EasyTarget

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
Ok , thanks for your concern!

RP: Hope Saturday is a better day with your gal. If it was me I think I would take it upon myself to go check out her building and where she is working. I think that will answer some questions for you. Here's hoping the answers are good.



Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
Thanks GTR,
...


So GTR, I think it's very possible that I am seeing what stress does to her and maybe it really has nothing to do with my relationship with her. Actually when I tried to kiss her and she turned away she was on my computer looking for a website. We weren't sitting together on the couch.

I would be real worried if she totally was un responsive to me, but it comes in spurts. It's not 100% of our time together that she is distant.


....



Royal... as some has said, different people handle stress in different ways.. some come home and drink, so just want to be LEFT ALONE for awhile... some internalize it and even get sick.... We had a female co-worker go to the hospital because she had a break down with the stress... and I don't think our job is stressful at all...

So, give her a break and let her have some breathing space... if she has been true to you (and you say she has NO problem telling you how she feels)... let her brood... things will get better one way or another (you can change jobs if it gets to bad and that seems to be what she wants to do)..



Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:
Originally Posted by joelunchbox
After reading through this a couple of times...Tell me if I am wrong...but isn't she acting how a lot of us guys act? We tend to clam up and want to deal with it ourselves. Sounds like all I would do is let her know I care and be there for her. Good luck, sounds like normal getting to know each other things.



I agree with this...



Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:
Originally Posted by neil277
Americans all over cant find love and cannot win a war.


Way off topic.... but we won the 'war' a long time ago... the stupid thing we did was stay and let people kill us... we need to leave and have the Iraqis fight and kill each other.. that is what they have been doing for centuries...



Posted by: GoingToRussia

Don't waste your breath on Neil Texas Proud, he isn't worth the paper I wipe my a$$ on! He only wants attention and he was wrong about JamesB and he has been wrong many times. He also insults and attacks people with his childish "I told you so" games.

Ignore him and he will go away.



Posted by: royalpalace774

I am happy to say that I spent all day & night with my girl and today was wonderful. As far as her not calling me yesterday, here is what happened.

She worked until 9pm and then went home and went to bed. I called her mother also at 8:55 pm and her mother said "ELENA WORK". So I tried to call her cell phone and it was turned off.

What happened was is she ran out of time on her cell, because when she came over this morning the 1st thing she did was charge more minutes onto her cell.
And I went with her to do it.

Over here you pay for your cell time in advance. She said she tried to call me to tell me she was working overtime and there were no time left on her phone. She didn't use the phone at work because she said she thinks it records all employees calls.

She called me at around 12:00 in the afternoon from home and said did my mother tell you I was working last night. And then she said she got home and just passed out in bed.

I really got paranoid for nothing. But there was one thing that was very important for her to know today. And that was "HOW SERIOUS I AM ABOUT HER".

She said to me while we were walking that she is about to change her life for me and how was I going to show her that my intentions are for real.

I mentioned that we were getting the K1 Visa. But that was not what she wanted to hear. And then it came to me. I never really officially proposed to her.

So all of a sudden my feelings just started to come out about how I felt about her and how I want to spend the rest of my life with her and I told her that she is it for me. I want her to be the mother of my children and have a happy home with laughter and happy children and grow old together. I just want us to be happy and work together to make this work and become a success of a life together as a united couple.


Well that is what she has been waiting for me to say since I got here. After I said all that everything changed to her looking like I just cured her of cancer.

We then went on a boat ride and held hands and kissed and it was just great. I gave her my camera to take pics while we were in the ocean. The ride lasted about an hour. We came back and went to eat Italian food and the we did some grocery shopping for me.

Still everything was great , kissing smiling and her attitude was wonderful.

We then walked around Derabosovskaya St. and around the Opera house and then back to my apt. It was beautiful with a nice breeze out.

I told her that I was going to take her & her parents to dinner this week and tell her parents that I am going to spend the rest of my life with your daughter and I am asking for your blessing.

When I told her I was going to do that she got even another level happier and the rest of the day was just perfect. She stayed until 1am and went home by cab. I asked her to stay but she said she was waking up at 7 am to help her niece with something and she would come over at about 1 in the afternoon.

We are going to see Harry Potter at the movies in Russian.

What I learned today is that she just wanted to hear from me exactly how I felt and really how serious I was about us. She just didn't want to go through the motions. She said she wanted me to look her in the eyes and say what my intent was for us.

It was as simple as that and It is the reason she said she was being a little stand offish .

So I am happy to say that I freaked out a little for nothing. The women just needed to be reassured about what was to come.



Posted by: Longfellow

That is so good to hear!
I'm happy that you and she are finding your way to a love and life together.
*sob* I promised myself I wouldn't cry!



Posted by: Pilgrim

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
The women just needed to be reassured about what was to come.


RP...."Women" has just become singular tense in your case.

Congratulations.



Posted by: GoingToRussia

Hi RP,

Glad to hear things are working out the way you planned. I guess this is a good lesson for all of us. Sounds like a "happily ever after" ending!

CONGRATS!!!



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pilgrim
RP...."Women" has just become singular tense in your case.

Congratulations.
Amen!
Time to start a new thread!
I suggest, "I've chosen 1 nice women (oops - woman!)... Now WHAT!"

LOL ;-)



Posted by: Longfellow

BTW, Royal...

Are you shaving your armpits to make her happy?
Someone said this was commonly asked... the oddest I've read today!



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by Longfellow
BTW, Royal...

Are you shaving your armpits to make her happy?
Someone said this was commonly asked... the oddest I've read today!


No, I haven't heard that mentioned by her or anyone yet. . But now that you told me about it I will be prepared. Anyway, my armpits don't really have much fuzz going on.



Posted by: Chrismc

Good news RP......I am glad it seems to be all working out again now, you know sometimes a little communication goes a long way, especially when it comes to telling a women how you feel about her, unfortunately, us men are not that hot on that type of stuff but I guess you have learned a good lesson this last few days, maybe she was just worried your plans were not fully worked out for the two of you?

One thing most women from the FSU are definately looking for is security and preferably with a strong but caring man, I think this is what had been missing in her own mind until you resolved it all yesterday.

Chris



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chrismc
Good news RP......I am glad it seems to be all working out again now, you know sometimes a little communication goes a long way, especially when it comes to telling a women how you feel about her, unfortunately, us men are not that hot on that type of stuff but I guess you have learned a good lesson this last few days, maybe she was just worried your plans were not fully worked out for the two of you?

One thing most women from the FSU are definately looking for is security and preferably with a strong but caring man, I think this is what had been missing in her own mind until you resolved it all yesterday.



Chris


Yes, that was a learning experience for me in dealing with her feelings & emotions. And I'm sure I have some more things to learn about her. But I will deal with them as they come up. I can just tell you that she isn't playing games when it comes to her changing her life for me.

She wants my intentions in Black & White. For her there is no Grey area. She doesn't want any question marks. She was married 2 times all ready. She wants to have 2 kids and have a happy future with no failure this time.

I don't know if her mind set comes from her dad. He was a high official in the Soviet Army and I met him and he is very mellow & relaxed and very funny now. Her parents are always laughing and joking. It was great to see that.

My girls 1st marriage was when she was about 20 years old. And her 2nd was to a guy from the U S 4 years ago. She has spent 1 year in the States four years ago and she liked it except for how her last marriage turned out.

I guess I can't blame her. For her to come to the U S and be with me means

1. Quit her job
2. Leave behind family & friends
3. Hope that I am 100% for us
4. etc.

I can tell you that there is nothing that can replace spending real time together. The phone calls from abroad are nice and you chat about the things that happen during the day. But in person face to face is so important.

I also know anything can change at any moment for good to worse. I am just takin it 1 day at a time and hoping for the best.



Posted by: Chrismc

Quote:
Originally Posted by RP
She wants my intentions in Black & White. For her there is no Grey area. She doesn't want any question marks. She was married 2 times all ready. She wants to have 2 kids and have a happy future with no failure this time.


That answers some questions here RP, the second marriage was definately a mistake, maybe the first one also?? you only get so many chances in life, she wil know that and the last things she wants is another marriage going wrong. I had a short relationship with a lady who had been married twice and she was always saying to me, "I cannot afford to make another mistake" she knew the others were both wrong for her and really didn't trust her own judgement at times.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RP
I guess I can't blame her. For her to come to the U S and be with me means

1. Quit her job
2. Leave behind family & friends
3. Hope that I am 100% for us
4. etc.


and yes she has a lot to give up for a SECOND time if she moves to the States, how could she live it down if things were to go wrong a second time.

I think now you are getting to know a bit more of what has been behind her actions over the last few days, I would look on that as a positive, because now you know, at least you can act accordingly and take whatever action you need too, before you were only guessing!

Chris



Posted by: tonton

RP,
I don't get here much anymore due to being busy with life, my RW wife etc. We are wonderfully happy and many comments by others have strong merits.

Have read your thread and can suggest to you on my thoughts about your situation.
1. It is too early for you to submit fiance visa (K-1 for you guys).
2. Take this trip as a learning experience, and propose later after you know each other further. It seems too much mis-communication between the 2 of you too engage in a huge commitment. Remember, it is a life commitment for the 2 of you.
3. Go home when are due to, and continue your communication as prior and see each other in Sept TOGETHER IN A FLAT TOGETHER 24/7. You can't rush a supposed marriage without having any real-life live-in connection. YOU MUST LIVE TOGETHER AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.

To be blunt - LIVE TOGETHER SOMEHOW. Her leaving you at 11, 12, 1am just doesn't fit...AT ALL.

There is no other way of finding suitability than having real time together, and dating/waiting for her to finish work/ hoping she calls you/ hoping she is in a good mood...does not fit. Take it slow, and go again before submitting any papers.

Take it easy

PS -
Your 1. 2.'s are ok
Your #3. - you must be in no doubt
Your #4.- there are no etc's, only firm beliefs in everything that you will endure with her and full knowledge of what she will be subject to when and if she arrives.



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by tonton
RP,
I don't get here much anymore due to being busy with life, my RW wife etc. We are wonderfully happy and many comments by others have strong merits.

Have read your thread and can suggest to you on my thoughts about your situation.
1. It is too early for you to submit fiance visa (K-1 for you guys).
2. Take this trip as a learning experience, and propose later after you know each other further. It seems too much mis-communication between the 2 of you too engage in a huge commitment. Remember, it is a life commitment for the 2 of you.
3. Go home when are due to, and continue your communication as prior and see each other in Sept TOGETHER IN A FLAT TOGETHER 24/7. You can't rush a supposed marriage without having any real-life live-in connection. YOU MUST LIVE TOGETHER AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.

To be blunt - LIVE TOGETHER SOMEHOW. Her leaving you at 11, 12, 1am just doesn't fit...AT ALL.

There is no other way of finding suitability than having real time together, and dating/waiting for her to finish work/ hoping she calls you/ hoping she is in a good mood...does not fit. Take it slow, and go again before submitting any papers.

Take it easy

PS -
Your 1. 2.'s are ok
Your #3. - you must be in no doubt
Your #4.- there are no etc's, only firm beliefs in everything that you will endure with her and full knowledge of what she will be subject to when and if she arrives.



Thanks for your insight tonton,
I don't know if you are aware that this is my 2nd time here with here. I was here for 2 weeks in April 07. I think the best way to see how we live together is to live in my house in Florida. Three months of her in my territory living where we would be for many years to me is the real test.

Coming here is fine but for me the real test is where home is. A k1 gives you 3 months to get married or don't get married.

I agree with alot of your thoughts on my situation. But I have to do it my way. I will come back again and we will go to Prague together in the last week of Sept.

Who knows what can happen. Maybe it will end after that trip or maybe it will go on.

I want to see what she is like in my territory. I will give her all the emotional support possible. But I just need to see her where we will wake up together everyday. "MY HOUSE IN FLORIDA" I'm giving 1000% now in her territory. Without a doubt.

Time will tell!



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by tonton
RP,
I don't get here much anymore due to being busy with life, my RW wife etc. We are wonderfully happy and many comments by others have strong merits.

Have read your thread and can suggest to you on my thoughts about your situation.
1. It is too early for you to submit fiance visa (K-1 for you guys).
2. Take this trip as a learning experience, and propose later after you know each other further. It seems too much mis-communication between the 2 of you too engage in a huge commitment. Remember, it is a life commitment for the 2 of you.
3. Go home when are due to, and continue your communication as prior and see each other in Sept TOGETHER IN A FLAT TOGETHER 24/7. You can't rush a supposed marriage without having any real-life live-in connection. YOU MUST LIVE TOGETHER AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.

To be blunt - LIVE TOGETHER SOMEHOW. Her leaving you at 11, 12, 1am just doesn't fit...AT ALL.

There is no other way of finding suitability than having real time together, and dating/waiting for her to finish work/ hoping she calls you/ hoping she is in a good mood...does not fit. Take it slow, and go again before submitting any papers.

Take it easy

PS -
Your 1. 2.'s are ok
Your #3. - you must be in no doubt
Your #4.- there are no etc's, only firm beliefs in everything that you will endure with her and full knowledge of what she will be subject to when and if she arrives.
RP,
I think I need to agree with Tonton. There are doubts and pains you express on this trip... one or two days of relief from that is not a real answer.
You are going back... don't fool around with 'my busy season' words... we all know you will go back!
Ask her to commit to being with you full time when she has no worries of work. It is still an idyllic circumstance, but 24/7 can help you to assess the situation better than now. You are currently riding the emotional roller-coaster.
I have faith that things will work out for the best - so long as you are clear-headed and open-hearted.

Now leave us alone and go love your woman, for crying out loud! ;-D LOL



Posted by: GoeastLJ

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
I think the best way to see how we live together is to live in my house in Florida.
.........
I want to see what she is like in my territory. I will give her all the emotional support possible. But I just need to see her where we will wake up together everyday. "MY HOUSE IN FLORIDA" I'm giving 1000% now in her territory. Without a doubt.



Just before I leave you alone, (or you leave us alone), please spare a thought and think again about what has been said here. We all want you to succeed. Things could be ok for all we know and you are the best placed person to make a judgment, but it looks like you have spent more time worrying about your relationship than having quality time together.

True, a faint heart never won the fair lady, but I think you needed to make this visit a face to face meeting, and that includes spending nights together. It doesn't sound like you have spent a good hour together (she surfs, cooks, when she comes to see you in the evenings).

With due respect, you don't want her to fall in love with your house. We have heard people here saying "I am not sure if she loves me but I think she will be ok once we are married", or "our marriage is not working and so we will try and have a baby to improve it"... You need to fall in love with each other and be able to demonstrate that wherever you are.



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by GoeastLJ
Just before I leave you alone, (or you leave us alone), please spare a thought and think again about what has been said here. We all want you to succeed. Things could be ok for all we know and you are the best placed person to make a judgment, but it looks like you have spent more time worrying about your relationship than having quality time together.

True, a faint heart never won the fair lady, but I think you needed to make this visit a face to face meeting, and that includes spending nights together. It doesn't sound like you have spent a good hour together (she surfs, cooks, when she comes to see you in the evenings).

With due respect, you don't want her to fall in love with your house. We have heard people here saying "I am not sure if she loves me but I think she will be ok once we are married", or "our marriage is not working and so we will try and have a baby to improve it"... You need to fall in love with each other and beabkle to demonstrate that wherever you are.
I could not say it better. GoEast is on the spot.



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by GoeastLJ
Just before I leave you alone, (or you leave us alone), please spare a thought and think again about what has been said here. We all want you to succeed. Things could be ok for all we know and you are the best placed person to make a judgment, but it looks like you have spent more time worrying about your relationship than having quality time together.

True, a faint heart never won the fair lady, but I think you needed to make this visit a face to face meeting, and that includes spending nights together. It doesn't sound like you have spent a good hour together (she surfs, cooks, when she comes to see you in the evenings).

With due respect, you don't want her to fall in love with your house. We have heard people here saying "I am not sure if she loves me but I think she will be ok once we are married", or "our marriage is not working and so we will try and have a baby to improve it"... You need to fall in love with each other and be able to demonstrate that wherever you are.



I appreciate the opinions guys. But we really need to not blow my 2 separate nights of her being under major stress from work bigger than it really is. if you want to get on point her I worried about 2 days out of 8 months. Not bad odds if you ask me.

When she went on my computer on the internet it was a total of about 3 minutes to show me a singer from Russia. She cooked a total of 3 times and I did it with her. Guys have you ever heard the saying "HEAR IT FROM THE SOURCE". Well, I am the source. We spend all the time possible together doing things or going somewhere.

Yes I had a day or 2 of questions. It wasn't anything that should bring up a red flag. And now everything is all right.

We were together all day today . Some time in the ocean and a little cruise. A little dinner and some walking and kissing and holding hands. Very romantic. She left my place a few minutes ago.

And I don't want her to fall in love with my house. But I do need us to be in a place where there is reality not fantasy.

But I can tell you all that if you had 2 choices to pick from to know if you and your future wife would work out and the choices were:

1. (90 days in place where couple will live as as if they were a married couple

2. 14 days in a vacation getaway where everyday chores and bills and real life are masked going swimming and sightseeing and taking pictures.

My obvious choice is number 1. If any one picks number 2 as the deciding factor they are in a dream world because you are taking her and meeting her in a dream world where you both forget the realties of real daily life.

If I put the brakes on and listen to some of you I can tell you because I am the "SOURCE that things will get bad.

Me and my girl have the understanding totally that our plan is to have her come to my home town and see what it is like to be together under the same roof in the place we will live.

And also I am sure I will get back in Sept and we will meet in Prague or somewhere else and live together for 7 days.

But guys I gotta tell you that the 7 days in Prague for me is not the test as it might be for some of you.

It's the 90 days you get with the K1 that tells all. There must be a reason they give you 90 days.

All I did a few days ago was blow some steam because she worked overtime and went home and it was Friday night. We straightened everything out and talked and now we understand each other.


Remember guys , if I tell you we had a misunderstanding that does not mean it went on for a week.

I'm a big boy and I can take care of everything logically in my life.

I think my logic makes the most sense and that is what I am going with. I do value the things some of you say. But the real deal is that the 2 things that made me a little upset have been discussed and I can tell things are good now.

So to sum this up. I will make MY FINAL DECISION after my 90 days of living with her under real life circumstances. Not a beautiful cozy romantic getaway where we all want to forget our real problems, walk on the beach, drink pina coladas, dance, go back to a room.

THINK ABOUT IT. There is a major difference.But some will agree and some wont. In the end it boils down to this. Whatever happens is my problem or success! I still love you guys , I'm just tellin it as I SEE IT!



Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774

But I can tell you all that if you had 2 choices to pick from to know if you and your future wife would work out and the choices were:

1. (90 days in place where couple will live as as if they were a married couple

2. 14 days in a vacation getaway where everyday chores and bills and real life are masked going swimming and sightseeing and taking pictures.

My obvious choice is number 1. If any one picks number 2 as the deciding factor they are in a dream world because you are taking her and meeting her in a dream world where you both forget the realties of real daily life.



I will disagree with you on this.... You should not bring her over to 'try' #1. That is very very unfair to the lady... she comes over and give up her job to see if you want to get married... and after a couple of months you say "well, it is not like I was hoping, so see Ya.." You have crushed this girl. She now has to go back and try and pick up the pieces and will probably never try again...

My choice is #3.. YOU go over to her place on your vacation time and live in HER apartment like you are married... and do NOT go out all the time... live like you would if you were married... hang out, watch TV, read... no, it is not really like it would be back home, but it would put you in the situation she will be in for awhile when she comes over... and don't fake it... do what you would do if you were at home...

You are in the best place to know what you want and what she wants... but the words that you put down tell a different story then what you are trying to say... there are a few who see the writing between the lines and it paints a different picture (and BTW, I am horrible at reading between the lines and I even see it)...

Can you have disagreements and still be for each other .... YES, that is where I am, but all the good offsets the few bad moments... and if that is what you have ... then good for you and congrats...



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas Proud
I will disagree with you on this.... You should not bring her over to 'try' #1. That is very very unfair to the lady... she comes over and give up her job to see if you want to get married... and after a couple of months you say "well, it is not like I was hoping, so see Ya.." You have crushed this girl. She now has to go back and try and pick up the pieces and will probably never try again...

My choice is #3.. YOU go over to her place on your vacation time and live in HER apartment like you are married... and do NOT go out all the time... live like you would if you were married... hang out, watch TV, read... no, it is not really like it would be back home, but it would put you in the situation she will be in for awhile when she comes over... and don't fake it... do what you would do if you were at home...

You are in the best place to know what you want and what she wants... but the words that you put down tell a different story then what you are trying to say... there are a few who see the writing between the lines and it paints a different picture (and BTW, I am horrible at reading between the lines and I even see it)...

Can you have disagreements and still be for each other .... YES, that is where I am, but all the good offsets the few bad moments... and if that is what you have ... then good for you and congrats...



Thanks for your insight Texas, but like I said you need to go to the SOURCE.
And there are only 2. Her and I.

1. She lives with her parents.
2. Impossible to stay with her and her parents.
3. She has enough faith in her heart to live with me for 90 days and is confident that it will work or she would not come in the first place.


Like I said , you don't know what I know when it comes to me and her. And I totally disagree with you texas.

Tex your idea to me is not reality. And because of her living with her parents, it can't be done. She wants to come to my home and live reality. It is even the words she uses to explain it to me.

There is no writing between the lines Texas . I am telling it like I see it without sugar coating. And Tex when you say you see the writing and even you can see it. Say it. We are all grown up here to hear exactly what someone wants to say. You don't have to sugar coat it for me.

I have done things my way in my life and I am happy with the outcome of everything so far. If you were a fly on my wall I might give you more roap. But I still will do it my way.

And also I want you to know that it's also her decision to do this. I didn't make this decision alone.

It's half her idea to live in reality with me. So is she wrong also in having faith that it will work?

I'm not trying to bust your chops Tex but all of these decisions that I am telling you about are made by 2 people . Her & I . Not just myself.



Posted by: Texas Proud

Royal.....
no sugar coating at all....

And..

Read my final two lines...



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas Proud
Royal.....
no sugar coating at all....

And..

Read my final two lines...



If this is what you are referring to:

Can you have disagreements and still be for each other .... YES, that is where I am, but all the good offsets the few bad moments... and if that is what you have ... then good for you and congrats...


Then yes, I agree. With these last 2 lines !



Posted by: GoingToRussia

Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas Proud
You are in the best place to know what you want and what she wants... but the words that you put down tell a different story then what you are trying to say... there are a few who see the writing between the lines and it paints a different picture (and BTW, I am horrible at reading between the lines and I even see it)...

Can you have disagreements and still be for each other .... YES, that is where I am, but all the good offsets the few bad moments... and if that is what you have ... then good for you and congrats...


Yes RP knows whats best.

I don't think they had a disagreement, I think it was a misunderstanding.



Posted by: EasyTarget

I wouldn't even consider it a mis-understanding. I think it was more like RP is thinking aloud during the middle of things and voicing his opinion. RP and his gal are working through things and getting closer. It is great.

RP: The only suggestion I would make is if she can stay with you for a week on this trip. It is true she has to wake up early, go to work, etc.. But wouldn't that be like reality? Every day / every hour you can spend together will help bring you closer together.

I wouldn't push the issue but I would ask her again. Is it she hasn't explained to her parents?



Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
If this is what you are referring to:

Can you have disagreements and still be for each other .... YES, that is where I am, but all the good offsets the few bad moments... and if that is what you have ... then good for you and congrats...


Then yes, I agree. With these last 2 lines !



Exactamundo....



Posted by: Spakoyna

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
Tex your idea to me is not reality. And because of her living with her parents, it can't be done. She wants to come to my home and live reality. It is even the words she uses to explain it to me.


I totally agree with Tex's option # 3 and as someone later suggested for her to stay with you on this trip. You guys are engaged to be married and you don't even know what she looks like when she gets up in the morning! I do not understand why she is not staying with you now! My 1st trip to my wife's home I rented an apartment and we stayed together because she lived with her mother and brother. On a later trip I did stay with her family.

I think you have a wrong impression about the 90 days. The 1st 30 or more will be like a vacation for her. There will be all kinds of adjustment issues,stresses,etc. The 2 of you need to be 110% before she comes here. Then there will be the insecurity issues she will have if you don't marry her when she thinks you should. Everybody I have known including myself(Man and woman) say they are going to wait til a week before the 90 days. It just never seems to work that way. I have seen quite a few relationships go through a hurricane because the guy wants to wait and the woman doesn't!

PS my wife was preaching to me before we got here that we need to be patient. I told her the decision when we marry is yours, I want you to be sure you will be happy with me in the US. Guess what...we were married the 2nd day of her 90 day visa!



Posted by: Alisa_L

I would agree with the opinion that you need to be together 24/7 while you are there in Ukraine. Talk to her once more and ask why she doesn't want to stay with you if she will have every evening a/c, taxi in the morning to get to work and you in the night...only advantages here for a girl who is on a K1 process with her fiance which is you, and this seam to be so normal for a loving woman who didn't see her fiancee since april.
All the best for you
Alisa



Posted by: j_c

I disagree, based on my limited experience ...lol . I think that you have a gut feeling if its gonna work out or not. I met my wife in august 2003, spent 20 days with her , married her in oct 03 on the second visit. She moved to the UK in Nov03 .....we are still married, have a son and, I will say it , have had to work damn hard at making it work for the first 2 years, but now, we are both in agreement that it was the right decision.

The point is, if you have the basic chemistry between you , and are prepared to put in the effort to adapt, change and compromise, it will work.( well , so far for me anyway!!!)

JC



Posted by: j_c

Forgot to add at the end : Some people are more cautious than others!

JC



Posted by: royalpalace774

Well according to the last couple posts I have read on your opinions. They are just that "OPINIONS" My fellow forum buddies. There is no rules here when it comes to what we are discussing.

It boils down to the choices that 2 grown up adults decide to put into action.

My girl wants to come to Florida and live with me in the EXACT CONDITIONS to see what thing will be like.

Yes, there is adjusting and stress. I have been seeing her everyday except 2 days so far. In my "OPINION" even if she stayed every night. We would basically have this scenerio.

1. She comes after work to my apt and we relax for a while and chat

2. we cook something or go to a restaurant.
3. we come back to apt and relax , watch tv, talk maybe make love
4. We fall asleep together
5. Alarm rings at 6am
6. She gets ready to go to work, shower, make up, etc.
7. Wakes me up to lock door as she leaves because there is only 1 key and door must lock from inside.


I have to tell you guys that I don't see how this pattern or something maybe a little different will really show us both what married life is like.

You guys do it your way and "WE WILL DO IT OUR WAY"

You notice I said "WE". We both discussed everything in detail about what we are striving for.

I don't know if I mentioned this , but she has all ready been to the U S 4 years ago and married a guy from the States. He turned out to be a monster and they got divorced.

We are 2 adults that have both made a plan. How can any of you tell me we are doin it all wrong and you all ready think you know the probable outcome of mine and her relationship together.

Relax guys. Me and my girl are 100% on the same page in every step of this.

I don't want to tell any of you that your plan is for the birds. How can you ASS UME our plan is not right for us.

Maybe some of you are fortune tellers and know the future. Or maybe some of you just do thing your way and things turn out OK.

Whatever way you choose to do your plan with your future fsu wife. It's up to you and her and no one else to put that plan in action.

I love you guys, but "OUR PLAN" IS NOT CHANGING , UNLESS WE OR ONE OF US CHANGES OUR MIND about something.

I'm in Odessa right now and had a great day with her. She came over and we got dinner and the night was real relaxed.

Thanks for your opinions. I know I sound like a hard ass right now. But I know the situation and myself. I do everything in my life the way I want unless there is a gun to my head. And I am very happy with the choices and things that are in my life or out of it.

Hey it worked for JC !I agree about the gut also. That's your human instinct at work.

Time to eat some peaches now. They taste great here.



Posted by: Longfellow

I don't think anyone is trying to tell you how to do it... there is no one 'right way'.
I think the opinions being offered to you are based solely in what we are receiving from you on this trip and in a hope for your best happiness and welfare. That is my position, anyhow.
Do you really feel like we are somehow attacking you or telling you what to do? I just don't read that here. I read concern and suggestion of ideas that might be helpful to your situation. I'm sorry if you see it differently and I, for one, will withhold my thoughts from now on.
And truth, if you didn't want the feedback, you wouldn't be making the posts.
Just be happy and do what is right for yourself and your lovely girl.
Best regards and wishes for your success,
ken



Posted by: royalpalace774

I have woken up to her next to me all ready SPAKOYNA, on the last trip and on this trip. It's just not everyday. And that's totally ok with me and her.

And what if I want to marry her and she doesn't want to marry me. There are so many different scenes to this that none of you and myself can know how good or bad anything will be for any of us.

But I am open to hearing what you have to say. I just take it in and do as I see fit.

And the impression about the k1 visa for 90 days is your impression of it. It's not mine at all.

I'm not going to stop everything in my life when she comes in the 1st 30 days and make believe it is a vacation like you say it will be.

I will work and live like I always live. I work for myself so I make my own hours. The truth is in my line of work I can literally take off for 3 weeks and do what I need to do the 4th week of the month.

But What will be will be. We both are confident that things will be fine or she would not come at all. She trusts me 100% or as if you guys say 110%.

And Spakoyna, our plan is not to wait 2 days before the 90 day period. It is going to be within the 1st 30 days.

So like a said a few posts ago. Go to the source. The only source here in "HER & I". Some of you say you need to do this and you need to do that.

If I listened to some of you I would have a nervous breakdown going up & down.

The plan is in action as we speak and everything is on schedule and everything is peaceful.



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
And what if I want to marry her and she doesn't want to marry me. There are so many different scenes to this that none of you and myself can know how good or bad anything will be for any of us.

You know the saying, "If 'ifs' and 'buts' were candy and nuts, every day would be Christmas"?
There are no guarantees in this life. Follow your heart, act with your brain engaged and what lies down the path will reveal itself in time.
I think, read carefully the Robert Frost poem 'The Road Not Taken'.
And I mean carefully... it is not what it seems on the surface...
Also, 'Wind and Window Flower'.
Both offer strong metaphors for each of us on the difficult journey to find love with someone half a world away. Metaphors on how it might be seen from both sides...



Posted by: GoingToRussia

RP is correct, all of these ideas are opinions. He hears your opinions so don't continue to repeat and try to ram them down his throat.

No one goes about finding a FSUW to marry in the same way. This topic has been discussed may times in this forum. It always boils down to opinions. There is no wrong way and there is no right way. Some men go to meet 1 woman, some go to meet multiple women. Some go with a plan and some just "wing it". You really don't know a person until you live with them for at least a year. As JC said, his first 2 years was a trial.

I know a man that spoke to a woman for 3 months. Went to see her and proposed. She arrived in the USA 5 months later. They were married in the USA and they have been married for 1 year next month. On the other hand, some men take years before they marry. As I said, there is no right way and there is no wrong way ... only opinions that work for some but not for all. Please respect RPs opinion and offer your support. He is comfortable with his decision and has started a K-1.

Good luck and well wishes RP!



Posted by: EasyTarget

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
1. She comes after work to my apt and we relax for a while and chat
2. we cook something or go to a restaurant.
3. we come back to apt and relax , watch tv, talk maybe make love
4. We fall asleep together
5. Alarm rings at 6am
6. She gets ready to go to work, shower, make up, etc.
7. Wakes me up to lock door as she leaves because there is only 1 key and door must lock from inside.

RP: you are right they are just opinions. In my opinion I would be doing the last item on #3 as much as possible. :-) and #4 as little as possible.
For me I would want to spend every second I could with the gal, especially knowing I wouldn't be able to see her for a few months.

The important thing here is if you are BOTH deciding what works for you, then GREAT!!! Only you and her knows what will work for ya.

Wishing you all the best for the future.



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by EasyTarget
RP: you are right they are just opinions. In my opinion I would be doing the last item on #3 as much as possible. :-) and #4 as little as possible.
For me I would want to spend every second I could with the gal, especially knowing I wouldn't be able to see her for a few months.

The important thing here is if you are BOTH deciding what works for you, then GREAT!!! Only you and her knows what will work for ya.

Wishing you all the best for the future.
Yes, as menu selctions go, i have to agree.



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by EasyTarget
RP: If it was me I think I would take it upon myself to go check out her building and where she is working. I think that will answer some questions for you. Here's hoping the answers are good.



Hi Guys,
I made it a point today to come back to ET'S QUOTE for a reason and I am not going to fully go into details yet.

I woke up today and did the usual. I had some cereal and bananas and then I went myself to the supermarket and bought a few things.

I know , you are all waiting for the real deal about this post.

All I am going to say at this point is this. I called my driver today and I took a ride . My driver was the guy who picked me up at the airport. He speaks perfect English.

There is more to come but let's end this post with "WE TOOK A RIDE" "AND SOME PICTURES. ".

You are all going to wait now for the next part on the edge of your seat I suppose. I can assure you, there is more coming. I just need a little time.



Posted by: j_c

RP , don't like the sound of this , and hope its a positive post for you.

JC



Posted by: Texas Proud

Royal....

I was going to stay out of this because I had said what I needed....

But you have seemed to attack the people who are giving you their opinions which you had asked... you said there were only two ways for things to happen and we said there were a few more you might not have thought about...

As you have said a few times, you are the only one who knows what is really happening... and the one who has to live with any decision made... so read what others think and decide what you need to do, just don't attack us and say we are know it alls and tell you you must do it our way... we are not and did not..

And I hope that your final post is not a bad one... it would be so sad if it is...



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas Proud
Royal....

I was going to stay out of this because I had said what I needed....

But you have seemed to attack the people who are giving you their opinions which you had asked... you said there were only two ways for things to happen and we said there were a few more you might not have thought about...

As you have said a few times, you are the only one who knows what is really happening... and the one who has to live with any decision made... so read what others think and decide what you need to do, just don't attack us and say we are know it alls and tell you you must do it our way... we are not and did not..

And I hope that your final post is not a bad one... it would be so sad if it is...



Hi Tex,
I just want you to know that I in know way attacked anyone on here. I stated that even hearing everyone's views that I will take them in and then do as I think should be done.

If I was attacking any one, my words would cut like a knife and I know you know the difference. Remember , I am posting on here because I like hearing what you guys think.

That doesn't mean I have to do what you say. It means I take in all the opinions and make a plan of what I will decide to do. Sorry if I offended you Tex. But I really do appreciate everyone's comments if if I like or dis like them.

I will let you guys know what the latest things happening here are.

I am at the point now where I just need to know a couple things or should I say facts. I'm O k.

It could be nothing or it could be something. Time will tell soon!



Posted by: Spakoyna

RP...I hope you do not think I am cramming my opinions down your throat! I was simply relating my experiences and those I have witnessed. I did not mean the 2 of you would be on vacation! I meant she would be! Being as she has been to the states before she is definately a step ahead of the game. I have known of several relationships where when a couple is 1st together here and the man is working the lady feels very neglected. I have heard this more than once "I feel like an animal in a cage".

I hope all is well with the 2 of you. As others have said....everyone has a different way and there is not perfect way to do this!

Good Luck!



Posted by: royalpalace774

Well I might as well tell you guys that I went to where I thought she works with my driver to take a look at the neighborhood and the whole scene.

Well the one thing I forgot was this. I went to the address that she put on her K1 visa. It's the old building and not the new one. This building I went to was a shack with some windows and a few in the wall a/c units.

She changed buildings after she filled out her part of the K1.

I wanted to check out the place like EASY TARGET thought I should do. Well I went to the wrong place.

I am going to tell her I want to pick her up from work on Friday because it is her and my birthday and we are taking her parents out to dinner.

As some of you know I have been giving her about $100 a month to take some taxis home from work because she said she is in a bad part of town with the new building.

The funny thing is she showed me the building on the internet and it looks like something on Park Ave in New York. So where I went today was surely not it.


I'm not saying I don't believe her about the neighborhood, it's just that I would like to see for myself what I am giving her a few bucks for.

So as of now IT'S A FALSE ALARM!

SORRY! I AM JUST A CURIOUS YOUNG SOUL THAT WANTS EVERYTHING TO BE O K ! Any way things are still o k !



Posted by: Longfellow

Nothing wrong with being curious (unless you are the proverbial cat) and wanting to get to know many aspects of your partner... how they live, work, etc. And as you said previously, to see for yourself what she means by 'bad neighborhood'.

I'd be curious too. Let us know your view of it after seeing the area.

BTW, don't you ever sleep?!



Posted by: joelunchbox

[QUOTE=royalpalace774]

There is more to come but let's end this post with "WE TOOK A RIDE" "AND SOME PICTURES. ".

QUOTE]

I hope you took some pictures near a famous landmark so you can use them in your visa package.


HHmmmm wait a minute....pictures? what kind of pictures......



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by Longfellow
Nothing wrong with being curious and wanting to get to know many aspects of your partner... how they live, work, etc. And as you said previously, to see for yourself what she means by 'bad neighborhood'.

I'd be curious too. Let us know your view of it after seeing the area.

BTW, don't you ever sleep?!


Believe it or not I sleep 7 hours a day. I'm not crazy about my bed here but I seem to find the right position and konk out for 7 hours.

I know you see me on here posting my daily schedule. I walk around the city and to the park where the Pushkin Statue is and sit on a bench a listen to some kids play guitar or walk to the seaside where the famous steps are and then I get some lunch in my apt and go on the net and just give you guys some thing to read.

Don't worry , I have a life. If you remember before my trip I made maybe 1 post every couple of weeks.

So it just gives me something to do. I have all sorts of widgets and stuff on my Macbook. But also it's pretty hot out there as far as the weather. I really don't like watching Russian T V. I am lost. So I turn on my I Tunes and leave the tv on without sound.
I have a bbc widget that has alot of radio stations. I listen to those also.



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
Don't worry , I have a life. If you remember before my trip I made maybe 1 post every couple of weeks.

So it just gives me something to do...

Well I don't! I am living vicariously through you until my trip to Ukraine in September... make it good, dammit! I'm depending on you! ROFL



Posted by: royalpalace774

Hi Guys,
Just got back from dinner and my girl went home to her house.

I asked my girl at dinner tonight if I can pick her up Friday from her job and then we would get her parents and go have some birthday dinner.

I don't know if you guys remember, but me & my women have the same birthday of August 3rd.

She said I will come to you after work on Friday and we will take taxi to my parents and then we all can go together in taxi to restaurant.

Then she said I bet you want to see where I work and the neighborhood. I said yes I am curious , is it possible for us to go on the weekend in a taxi and see where you work. She said Ok I will show you this neighborhood.

She told me today that her work situation today was incredibly horrible.
The air conditioning is OFF with no open windows and there are now 5 women doing the work of ten.

She said it is customary on your birthday to bring and set up a table of food for your fellow employees and she is stressing about that because she knows there is no open windows or ventilation and the food is gonna start smelling bad.

And to top it off her boss officially told everyone that she was leaving the company. My girl at the right moment talked to her boss and said to her that she would love to go with her to her next job if all possible.

My women Thinks that her job can possibly end within the next month or two art a moments notice and if her boss that is leaving can not take her with her there is the possibility that she could be totally out of work.

Thank god she lives with her parents and has a roof over her head. I was at her parents home last April and they have a great place with alot of nice wood.

She told me she is worried about all of us being happy where we will eat on Friday night. She knows I don't eat anything fried and her parents have a certain taste and we are also going to have my girl's best friend in the whole world join us also for birthday dinner.

I also got to tell you guys my stomach is in an uproar here . I don't know what's up. I have been eating good I think and drinking lots of bottled water and today and last night I had one of those bathroom moments like I have never experienced before. LOL
I hope the bottled water I am buying in the supermarket isn't tap water disguised. My girl said it's good water, but last night & tonight when I got back to the apartment was a danger zone. lol lol lol lol

Enough of that stuff. Things are ok and we had some more talks today about the future and she said to me I am really looking forward to us being together in Florida. And we talked about having kids. She said she would love to have two. I said , I bet we have 2 girls and a house full of all women and me. She laughed.

So everything is good so far except her getting stressed out about her work situation. She even said to me that she was sorry about her stress and me being here with her when it was all happening.

I said just try and relax and deal with what happens and think positive good things are on the way. She kissed me and it was a nice moment.

So now I will lie on my couch and flic through some Russian t v and listen to the bbc radio.



Posted by: GoingToRussia

I get those bathroom moments too RP! If you buy fruit, wash them in bottled water. Fruit is usually wash in tap water and there can be a nasty residue on the fruit. I also think I am allergic to a spice they use for fish so you might want to stay away from the fish.

I hope all turns out well. You've met her parents and you will meet her best friend ... these are good signs.

What ever the outcome is, we will be here to support you.



Posted by: sidney

DELETED



Posted by: sidney

Check the bottled water seal. They will use tap water and reseal it. I only eat pealed or cooked food. I even brush my teeth w/ BOTTLED water.
Sid



Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:
Originally Posted by sidney
Check the bottled water seal. They will use tap water and reseal it. I only eat pealed or cooked food. I even brush my teeth w/ BOTTLED water.
Sid


Yes... I was going to say this.... and also remember when you take a shower not to gargle or wash out your mouth with the water...

Royal... thanks for the words... and I did not take offense, but it seems some did which is why I posted.... All seems to be going great for you and of course having someone who has already been here is a BIG plus in my book... no big surprises to her with the culture shock...

Take care..

And for Gods sake, liven it up for Longfellow... poor guy



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas Proud
Yes... I was going to say this.... and also remember when you take a shower not to gargle or wash out your mouth with the water...

Royal... thanks for the words... and I did not take offense, but it seems some did which is why I posted.... All seems to be going great for you and of course having someone who has already been here is a BIG plus in my book... no big surprises to her with the culture shock...

Take care..

And for Gods sake, liven it up for Longfellow... poor guy


Hi Guys,
I had a bad night of waking up and going to the bathroom alot last night. My stomach is feeling way of of whack. Is there a particular brand of water in the super market that I should buy. Or Should I look to see if there is a seal on the bottle cap for the water.

I need to feel better soon , this is not good. Every time I get up from sitting it seems that something wants to exit me. I have to correct this quick. So please give me SOME BRANDS to buy if you know any. I think it's possible that BONAQUA might be good. Any one know?

I'm sure that Perrier is probably good for water with gas. But I also need regular water without gas. How do you know if it's been re sealed?



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas Proud
And for Gods sake, liven it up for Longfellow... poor guy

Yeah RP. Thanks for sharing your latest... but this is not really the the kick in the a$$ I was hoping for! (pun intended) ;-ч

Hope you're feeling better very soon, buddy!



Posted by: deccie

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
Hi Guys,
I had a bad night of waking up and going to the bathroom alot last night. My stomach is feeling way of of whack. Is there a particular brand of water in the super market that I should buy. Or Should I look to see if there is a seal on the bottle cap for the water.

I need to feel better soon , this is not good. Every time I get up from sitting it seems that something wants to exit me. I have to correct this quick. So please give me SOME BRANDS to buy if you know any. I think it's possible that BONAQUA might be good. Any one know?

I'm sure that Perrier is probably good for water with gas. But I also need regular water without gas. How do you know if it's been re sealed?


Royal, ask your girl for some carbon tablets from the local pharmacy.
(My girl calls the coal tablets) They work really well.

What your going through right now happens to me nearly every time I go to St Pete's. It's the part about going there I like least. It's impossible for me to avoid the local water since my girl and her mother continually make tea from it and would be offended if i didn't take part.

If, on the other hand you think you've had soem bad food.. try taking several whole peppercorns. That works well too. Must kill any bacteria. The Russian remedy is Vodka mixed with salt.. Again, must kill anything in your stomach!



Posted by: EasyTarget

RP: BonAqua is a US brand it is made by coca-cola. They take the purified water that they normally put into coke, and just put it in to bottles.

You need Imodium AD (Loperamide) fast!!! If you go to the pharmacy, and well without being too graphic use hand motions to explain what you is wrong, I am sure the girl behind the counter will laugh, but will be able to help you.

Usually the cause is undercooked meat, not water supply. 2 years living in turkey taught me how to ask to make sure the meat was burnt. Not cooked burnt. Only way I could get past not having problems.

Although you did say you were eating fruit - pesticides could also be the reason. Ukraine does not have the tight EPA rules like the US does. Also fecal matter run off in the irrigation system is a pretty common occurrence. Wash the fruit with bottled water -- twice!!!

Totally sucks that she feels like her job is on the line, that can stress anyone out. I was in the same situation about 2 months ago. I was really nutso. Maybe things will calm down in a few weeks.

Well hopefully you can find her new building and see where she works.

Best of luck to you with her birthday dinner.



Posted by: lester

Mornin' RP, this may help.

There is a vary good drug-store in Derebasovskaya Street, close to the parkland area and market.
They did have english speaking staff a while back.
This is copy of the Imodium I purchased there.

Hope you're feeling well soon!



Posted by: Chrismc

Blimey Lester, the only man I know who scans absolutely everything but I have to say this time you could have just saved the day for poor ole RP big respect mate!



Posted by: royalpalace774

Thanks guys,
I have just done some research on the net about things I can do. It says that the 1st thing you don't want to happen is get de-hydrated.

Drink plenty of clear fluids like apple juice and good water even gatorade. And it should be ok within 5 days "I HOPE"

Thanks Lester for that exact package. I know if I can find the place I will be able to pick that one out.

I sent my girl a sms to get me some carbon tablets when she comes here today after work



Posted by: firemansam

Yeah, my two kopeks... The local water is not going to give you the trots, it will only kill you.. in time. It's not tainted, it's poison

Hence, I would not worry too much about the water playing havock with your lower colon, so as already mentioned, get along to the local pharmacy and get some cloggong agents and all will be fine

Sam.



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by lester
Mornin' RP, this may help.

There is a vary good drug-store in Derebasovskaya Street, close to the parkland area and market.
They did have english speaking staff a while back.
This is copy of the Imodium I purchased there.

Hope you're feeling well soon!



I just got the Imodium and popped 2 of them. Let's hope it works. Today I need to chill and just relax. Everyday I have been walking all over the place, of course on a good stomach.

My girl is bringing some of those carbon tablets later. Is it ok for me to take them when I have the Imodium in my system ? Or should I wait until tomorrow to take the Carbon Tablets ?If any of you guys know let me know.

The weather here has cooled up. Last night was just incredible. Not hot, not cold. Just right. If it could be like that here everyday I would be in heaven. I hate when the sweat of your shirt sticks to your clothes.

Well 6 more days here and my trip is over. I hope things work out positive for my girl at her job. I can tell she is worried. I try & comfort her but everyone has their own way of dealing with the things that the world throws at you



Posted by: deccie

RP, I would wait to see what the immodium does before taking the carbon tablets too.

Otherwise you might go from one extreme to the other!

I just got back from 5 weeks in Europe with my lady and you should have seen the stacks of medication she took with her. She did have cause to go see a doctor while we were in France.. He just shook his head at some of the medication she had. I gather a lot of it would not have been available in France!

Ask your lady if she knows about the Vodka and Salt remedy.. I have had the misfortune to take it once already.. it did work.. but the taste was horrible!


About your lady and her job.. I have certainly seen offices like you describe in St Pete's. Small, packed, no air con in summer and the windows bolted, latched other otherwise rendered inoperative. It's more scary when the fire exits are in this condition.

Unfortunately there's probably not much you can do to help the situation directly but you could stress IF you are comfortable with the idea (and only if) that you will be there to support her if the worst happens and she needs to find a new job. I wouldn;t be looking to replace her income but you could make sure the essentials are paid.

Some guys don't want to do this, others are just plain against it, but I know some here have done it too. It's a "do what's right for you" situation.



Posted by: Spakoyna

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
Hi Guys,
I had a bad night of waking up and going to the bathroom alot last night. My stomach is feeling way of of whack. Is there a particular brand of water in the super market that I should buy. Or Should I look to see if there is a seal on the bottle cap for the water.

I need to feel better soon , this is not good. Every time I get up from sitting it seems that something wants to exit me. I have to correct this quick. So please give me SOME BRANDS to buy if you know any. I think it's possible that BONAQUA might be good. Any one know?

I'm sure that Perrier is probably good for water with gas. But I also need regular water without gas. How do you know if it's been re sealed?


Sounds a little too late to change. I hope you brought some imoddium Ad? Spelling? Never go to the FSU without it.



Posted by: Spakoyna

LOL! I should have known I'd get beat to the punch on the Imoddium. Good going guys!

I'll offer up another suggestion if the Imoddium doesn't work. I would have never believed it myself! I got some bad food or somin a couple a years ago and couldn't stay off the toilet. This had been goin on for a couple a days and my wife put her foot down. She made me drink tea made from fresh garlic. Yuck....but I must say I was fine in less than 24 hours. Think I drank(and ate the cut up cloves) twice.



Posted by: royalpalace774

Hi Guys,
As you know I took the Imodium around 11:00 in the morning. And The trips to the toilet stopped but my stomach feels bruised. I relaxed all day and just relaxed on the couch and watched tv all day.

At one point I felt like I had to get out of the apartment so I walked to the Pushkin Statue in the park and sat down on a bench.

After about 25 minutes of sitting it starts raining cats & dogs and everybody runs foe cover. I got under a building and when it stopped I made my way back to my apt.

My girl came over around 6:30 and she brought with her the COAL TABLETS. She insisted I take 6 of them. I told her that I all ready too Imodium at 11 in the mornong. She said that was a long time ago and these tablets will kill everything nasty in your stomach.

So I took 6 of them. Then she sid I will be right back. She went to the supermarket and brought back stuff to cook for me. She cut up alot of bread and put it into the oven. She made me a piece of chicken with a little rice. She made some warm apples that she pealed the skin off of and they were really good. There is left over for tomorrow of that.

I got pampered tonight like a hospital patient. I have to say that I feel a little better but my stomach is out of whack. There are left overs for me to eat for tomorrow and she brought some yogurt and made me make a list of what my eating habits will be for tomorrow.

I hope it was ok to take the coal tablets. It was 8 hours later and I'm not feeling loads better but I'll survive it. And then after I ate my little dinner she gave me another little pill to take and said this will be good for your stomach also.

I was thinking that maybe I SHOULDN'T TAKE ALL THIS STUFF TODAY BUT WE WILL SEE !

Still have that little quezzy feeling. Well we will see how I sleep tonight.

She was so wonderful tonight.



Posted by: lester

Good to hear you're on the mend!!

The charcoal tablets will be ok, I've had them before, plus the baked bread and very hard dry biscuits too.
Mint tea was also administered.

You'll find the "john" blackened tomorrow though!! hehe

spakoyne nocha!



Posted by: GoingToRussia

I would keep taking the Imodium. This is what I used the first time I went to Russia and it worked in about 3 days.

Bonaqua is what I drank in Russia. It should be good.

Good luck with the "Trots"



Posted by: royalpalace774

My luck , I heard a noise under the sink that wouldn't stop. It's the water pump I guess for the sinks and the shower. It sounded like it was gonna blow up and when I went closer to look at it I could feel heat coming out of it.

I unplugged it. Now I have absolutely no water in my apt.

Got to tell the landlord to fix this quick tomorrow when I wake up. I can't take a shower or wash my hands . It worked fine when my girl made dinner & now if I plug it back in the sound is so loud coming from It that it sounds like it could explode.

It looks like a motor with a red tank on top of a motor with valves.



Posted by: GoingToRussia

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
My luck , I heard a noise under the sink that wouldn't stop. It's the water pump I guess for the sinks and the shower. It sounded like it was gonna blow up and when I went closer to look at it I could feel heat coming out of it.

I unplugged it. Now I have absolutely no water in my apt.

Got to tell the landlord to fix this quick tomorrow when I wake up. I can't take a shower or wash my hands . It worked fine when my girl made dinner & now if I plug it back in the sound is so loud coming from It that it sounds like it could explode.

It looks like a motor with a red tank on top of a motor with valves.


Well you've had a string of bad luck with your health and apartment. Hope things change for the better soon.

Can't help you with the pump except next time maybe get a hotel room!



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by GoingToRussia
Well you've had a string of bad luck with your health and apartment. Hope things change for the better soon.

Can't help you with the pump except next time maybe get a hotel room!



This is crazy. I woke up today around 8:00 am and of course I had to go to the bathroom and as you know I had no water because the water pump under the sink was making all sorts of loud whiney sounds and had alot of heat coming from it.

Of course my biggest fear is going to the toilet and knowing that you can't flush down anything with the pump being out of work.

Just for the hell of it, I plugged it back in and within 10 seconds everything was working great. I had water in the sinks, shower and the toilet flushed.


Maybe we worked the pump too much yesterday and it just needs a rest.

Sounds crazy , but I am amazed right now that it is ok. Imagine if I had to be without a working toilet for a few days in my condition with my stomach. Oh I forgot, was it Lester & GTR who mentioned something about the trots.

I can just tell you that it's the 1st time in my life I had a BLACK MORNING on the toilet.



Posted by: deccie

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
Hi Guys,
As you know I took the Imodium around 11:00 in the morning. And The trips to the toilet stopped but my stomach feels bruised. I relaxed all day and just relaxed on the couch and watched tv all day.

That's exactly how I tend to feel as well, so for the first day after I tend to eat light stuff.


Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
My girl came over around 6:30 and she brought with her the COAL TABLETS. She insisted I take 6 of them. I told her that I all ready too Imodium at 11 in the mornong. She said that was a long time ago and these tablets will kill everything nasty in your stomach.


Wow, is a bit of a dose. I get told to take 3. Like Lester said though I doubt they will hurt anything.

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
I was thinking that maybe I SHOULDN'T TAKE ALL THIS STUFF TODAY BUT WE WILL SEE !


She was so wonderful tonight.


When I was crook in France my lady gave me something like 5 different lots of medication to take. I can tell you I was really wondering about the interaction between everything as what as "what the heck is the stuff!"

It is a really nice feeling to be cared for by your lady when you are ill.
Some of the things my K has done for me at those times go well above and beyond the call of duty..



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by deccie
That's exactly how I tend to feel as well, so for the first day after I tend to eat light stuff.




Wow, is a bit of a dose. I get told to take 3. Like Lester said though I doubt they will hurt anything.



When I was crook in France my lady gave me something like 5 different lots of medication to take. I can tell you I was really wondering about the interaction between everything as what as "what the heck is the stuff!"

It is a really nice feeling to be cared for by your lady when you are ill.
Some of the things my K has done for me at those times go well above and beyond the call of duty..


My girl has all ready sent me 3 sms messages this morning from her workplace and is making sure I eat what she told me to write down last night.

I took 4 more Carbon Tablets , ate some yogurt, drank some hot green tea and some of the hard baked bread she made last night. Nice & crunchy bread I should say.

I still have that bad feeling in my stomach. I wish that would just get back to normal. It's real uncomfortable.

What are these carbon tablets supposed to really do? Are they something that kills any kind of bacteria or is its purpose totally something different. I don't even know.

If any of you guys know, fill me in. I do like to know why I'm taking something and putting it into my body.



Posted by: EasyTarget

Carbon tablets normally are taken for urinary tract infections. They really won't hurt you in any way. The black you saw this morning is just the stuff passing through your system, don't worry.

Normally with Imodium, you take 2 tablets and then continue taking one tablet until your colon stiffens up.

Here is a good thing...Your gal is showing that she cares about you and is concerned about your health. Play the good patient follow her advice and avoid the doctor. You will be ok tomorrow.

The water pump most likely was making the noise because a small stone or debris was clogged against the seal near the piston. Remedy in the future is to unplug it like you did and some gentle tapping on the top will dislodge the stone. Most likely during the night the piston slid down the valve and the stone popped on top of the piston.

The pump should be fine for the rest of your trip. I know it sounds really odd at first but if you know what it is, then you worry less. :-)



Posted by: lester

Mornin' RP, don't worry about the tablets. They neutralise the contents of the stomach.
When diarrhea is triggered by some toxic substance, whether ingested directly or produced secondarily by bacteria, viruses, or as a functional problem of the bowels, charcoal is historically a potent remedy.

I make charcoal, sold for water filtration/barbeque use mainly, and I gave it to my dog, to reduce bad breath and stop it f*rting!!



Posted by: royalpalace774

Thanks guys for the info. I also went on the net and found this:

What is it? Activated Charcoal is a supplement used when accidental poisonings have occurred. The charcoal helps absorb the poison and carry it out of the body. It is also used to treat high cholesterol, diarrhea, upset stomach, and gas.

Other names for Activated Charcoal include: Active Carbon, Adsorbent Charcoal, Carbo Activatus, Carbon Active, Carbon Attivo, Decolorising Charcoal, and Medicinal Charcoal.

Ask your doctor, nurse, or pharmacist if you need more information about this medicine or if any information in this leaflet concerns you.

Before Using: Tell your doctor if you ...

* are taking medicine or are allergic to any medicine (prescription or over-the-counter (OTC) or dietary supplement)
* are pregnant or plan to become pregnant while using this medicine
* are breastfeeding
* have any other health problems, such as high blood pressure or heart or blood vessel disease

Dosage: Talk with your caregiver about how much Activated Charcoal you should take. The amount depends on the strength of the medicine and the reason you are taking Activated Charcoal. If you are using this medicine without instructions from your caregiver, follow the directions on the medicine bottle. Do not take more medicine or take it more often than the directions tell you to.

To store this medicine: Keep all medicine locked up and away from children. Store medicine away from heat and direct light. Do not store your medicine in the bathroom, near the kitchen sink, or in other damp places. Heat or moisture may cause the medicine to break down and not work the way it should work. Throw away medicine that is out of date or that you do not need. Never share your medicine with others.

Drug and Food Interactions: Since Charcoal has such a strong ability to absorb material, it may cause problems with any medicine you may be taking by reducing how much gets absorbed by your body. This has the potential to be life threatening. If you are taking any drugs, check with your health care giver before taking Activated Charcoal. The following have been studied and are not well absorbed when taken with Charcoal:

* Acarbose
* Carbamazepine (Tegretol(R))
* Digoxin (Lanoxin(R))
* Furosemide (Lasix(R))
* Leflunomide
* Miglitol (Glyset(R))
* Olanzapine (Zyprexa(R))

Warnings:

* Before taking Activated Charcoal, tell your doctor if you are pregnant or breastfeeding

Side Effects: Stop taking your medicine right away and talk to your doctor if you have any of the following side effects. Your medicine may be causing these symptoms which may mean you are allergic to it.

* Breathing problems or tightness in your throat or chest
* Chest pain
* Skin hives, rash, or itchy or swollen skin

Other Possible Side Effects: You may have the following side effects, but this medicine may also cause other side effects. Tell your doctor if you have side effects that you think are caused by this medicine.



Posted by: royalpalace774

After breakfast today I start to do my laundry and half way through the wash the city of Odessa turns the water supply off in the center of the city where I am downtown. And who knows when it will be turned on again.

This is my 3rd time here and the 1st two times I never had any of the problems with water and electricity and my health.

It doesn't stop. I couldn't even take a shower. I hoped there would be enough reserve to take a shower so I got in and turned it on and there was nothing. I just started laughing. This should be on a Saturday Night Live Episode!



Posted by: Longfellow

Quote:
Originally Posted by lester
...and I gave it to my dog, to reduce bad breath and stop it f*rting!!
Now you're certain to win the girl! LOL



Posted by: j_c

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
After breakfast today I start to do my laundry and half way through the wash the city of Odessa turns the water supply off in the center of the city where I am downtown. And who knows when it will be turned on again.

This is my 3rd time here and the 1st two times I never had any of the problems with water and electricity and my health.

It doesn't stop. I couldn't even take a shower. I hoped there would be enough reserve to take a shower so I got in and turned it on and there was nothing. I just started laughing. This should be on a Saturday Night Live Episode!


Spoke to my wife this morning , she is in Russia staying with her mother...they have just cut off the hot water for 2 WEEKS!!!!! So they can do some maintenance. Must be one hell of a bolier in that block for it to take two weeks. She says its the same every summer.

JC



Posted by: royalpalace774

Hi Guys,
I have to say I'm feeling better from those carbon pills. My stomach is almost 100% . Maybe when I wake up tomorrow it will be fine.

Now for my nightmare! I had absolutely no water in my apt since 12 in the afternoon today. I can't flush the toilet and no sinks or shower.

Tomorrow is my birthday and my girls birthday and we are all going out tomorrow night to eat for our birthday with her best friend and her parents.

I called my landlord and said what's up with the water, it should be on by 6 and it wasn't.

She called me back and said she found out that in my building there is no water pressure on my floor and I might have it working by very very late tonight.

And then she said that it is also possible that if it is not working by late tonight that I will probably be without any water including in the toilet for 5 -7 days.

Guys, don't you think I AM ENTITLED TO SOME KIND OF REFUND IF THE F---IN
WATER DOESN'T WORK FOR THE REST OF MY 5 DAYS HERE. This could get nasty in my apt. I am just getting over having stomach chaos and I know I will have to go eventually and do what is neccessary.

What do I got to do now. Go into a restaurant , buy a meal and be allowed to use the toilet.

This is really pissing me off now. Now tomorrow there is a possibility that it could work. But she said no guarantee.

What would you do if you were in this situation ?

I might walk over to the apt building I rented from in April and see if I might rent something there if I can get a decent rate. I think I deserve some kind of refund and I bet even if I ask for it she will just say I'm sorry I can't do that.

This s---ks the big one!



Posted by: solstice

Man that really bites! Maybe your girlfriend could to talk to your landlord and they could come up with some solution or alternatives.



Posted by: Spakoyna

Man..that does suck! You are definetly experiencing "Murphy's Law". Perhaps the forces that may be will inspire you lady to invite you to stay in her apartment for the remainder of your stay! Fingers crossed for you! If not I am sure your lady will come up with some sort of arrangement. Worst case senario is you might have to go stay in a hotel.



Posted by: royalpalace774

I just checked the availability of apartments on my landlords website and I found an apartment that is vacant from Aug 4th -6th. It is $15.00 more per day than I am paying now.

As far as I'm concerned my landlord has no choice but to put me in this apt for those few days. She has no excuse. It's vacant Aug 4-6 and I paid for all of this up front.

The bad thing here is it's vacation time and this place is full of tourists renting everything up.

So tomorrow we will see. she better come through or there is gonna be some hell. It's bad enough that I won't have any water or toilet on my birthday.

I haven't taken a shower in 24 hours and it is real uncomfortable right now for me.

I have to go to dinner with my girls parents tomorrow night and stay in this stink hole. Everything is fine except absolutely no water anywhere to be found.



Posted by: GoingToRussia

OH OH RP!!! You should stop using the coal tablets ... because you're "breastfeeding"!!! LOL



Posted by: GoingToRussia

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
I just checked the availability of apartments on my landlords website and I found an apartment that is vacant from Aug 4th -6th. It is $15.00 more per day than I am paying now.

As far as I'm concerned my landlord has no choice but to put me in this apt for those few days. She has no excuse. It's vacant Aug 4-6 and I paid for all of this up front.

The bad thing here is it's vacation time and this place is full of tourists renting everything up.

So tomorrow we will see. she better come through or there is gonna be some hell. It's bad enough that I won't have any water or toilet on my birthday.

I haven't taken a shower in 24 hours and it is real uncomfortable right now for me.

I have to go to dinner with my girls parents tomorrow night and stay in this stink hole. Everything is fine except absolutely no water anywhere to be found.


You have 1 other option, check into a hotel for a day or 2 ... if you can find 1 and want all the necesseties like flush toilets and showers. Or maybe to at least smell good for your birthday.



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by GoingToRussia
OH OH RP!!! You should stop using the coal tablets ... because you're "breastfeeding"!!! LOL



Breastfeeding? I have steam coming out off my head right now like a train ready to knock a building down and not put the brakes on.



Posted by: GoingToRussia

Yes breastfeeding ... as in nursing or suckling. Think about it RP ... it will come to you ... I hope.

Settle down a little RP and remember why you went on ths trip. It will calm your soul knowing you have a girl that takes such good care of you.

Enjoy your time together.



Posted by: lester

Mornin' RP,
For emergency washing this maybe an option.

Swimming Pool
Fontanskaya Doroga 74 (Фонтанская дорога)
Tel: 37-79-74

Alternatively, go bathe in the sea?



http://www.odessaguide.com/


Look around this website, some good info. and a city map.

Good luck!



Posted by: royalpalace774

Quote:
Originally Posted by GoingToRussia
Yes breastfeeding ... as in nursing or suckling. Think about it RP ... it will come to you ... I hope.

Settle down a little RP and remember why you went on ths trip. It will calm your soul knowing you have a girl that takes such good care of you.

Enjoy your time together.


You are right GTR. I need to keep cool and just do what I need to do tomorrow. I just sent an email to the last apt manager where I stayed last April, asking if there is anything available f