The Russian Meeting Place: A place to meet people and talk about all things Russian...

International Discussions about Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, Travel, Music, Russian News, Ukrainian culture, Belarusian Dating, Moscow, Saint Petersburg, Kiev and other intelligent topics about life in the former Soviet Union.

     


                                

              

Pages: 1

IS SHE GENUINE OR A PRO? PLEASE TELL ME

(Click here to view the original thread with full colors/images)

Posted by: royalpalace774

I met a young 33-year-old girl from Kherson, Ukraine on an international dating site. We talked with each other for 6 months. It started as emails and then we spoke on the phone. She told me how important it was for her to have a family one-day with a good man and raise children and give them a good education in America. And our talks everyday were very nice. We always talked for at least 30 minutes every 3 or 4 days. I told her I would come to see her. I also asked her if she worked a job in the Ukraine. She said that she lives with her parents and does not work. I asked her why she does not work. She tells me that she will wait for me to visit her because if she has a job the boss would fire her if she took off for 7 days. She said she is giving the priority to our meeting in Odessa. I then went to the Ukraine to spend 7 days with her. She met me in Odessa and came to the airport to pick me up with a driver that I paid for in advance. Before I came to see her she was very excited about me coming. I even started to call her every day before I went to see her. Our first day together we went to eat dinner and it was very relaxing and nice. We take a few pictures also. On the second day there we ate lunch and then we walked into a shopping mall that had beautiful shops. She was picking up nice pocket books and looking at them and I just watched her and I made comments like "That one is nice". And we then went into other shops and looked around. When we left the shops and started to walk in the street her mood became very different towards me. I said to her what is wrong and she said nothing is wrong. I asked again and she said nothing is wrong. I then asked her if she was mad that I did not buy her anything in the shops. She got very angry and said that I was a penny pincher and I was cheap. She said I was totally not aware of how to treat women. She said that I did not pay attention to the little things and she told me she was angry . I have already spent $1200.00 on my plane fare and I also rented a 2-story apartment for $140.00 per day for 7 days and we were eating in the best restaurants in town at about $65.00 a meal in U S dollars. And we ate out 2 to 3 times a day. When we got back to the apartment she said she was packing her things and leaving in the morning to go back home. I then said to her that she is being ridiculous about this. I told her I just got here yesterday afternoon and she is not being fair to me. She then yelled " YOU ARE WAITING FOR THE RESULT. I said what does that mean. I said to her that I came to the Ukraine to see only her and I want to see if we are good for each other. And I have just arrived here yesterday. She said that I was waiting to see if she would have sex with me and then I would probably get her presents. She said that I was waiting to see if she would sleep with me. But the truth is I did not go there at all for sex. I truly was looking to see her and only her and to see if we were emotionally compatible. I went there looking for a life partner and the future mother of my children, not a sex toy. So I then convinced her to stay and not go home. She said that we were both thinking different things about the situation. And she said that maybe I was sincere in my actions. On day 3 we go have lunch and she gets a call from her mother. Her mother asks her if it is going well with me and she tells her mother that she does not know if I am the right one and she needs more time to be with me. Her mother then tells her that she wont come to Odessa to meet us because if she is unsure about me it was a waste of time to meet me. Then she hangs up with her mother and starts crying and tells me her mother told her to not even come back home. She tells me her mother wants her to find someone and that she is too picky. Now at this point I really don?t know who really called her on her cell phone. She could have made that all up. I then feel bad for her and I tell her that we should go to the shops again. She says NO. And I ask her again and she says why should we go there. So we go, and I buy her a lady's handbag for $90.00. It is the one she picked up the day before when we had our little fight. Then I go into another shop and spend $185 on cosmetics for her. She is now in a better mood and she says thank you to me. At lunch on day 4 she tells me stories about meetings with other men in the last 3 years that have turned out horrible. And how she trusts nobody. We never speak about what our future together could be like. We just watch television and go out to lunch and dinners. But I remember thinking to myself that something just does not feel right about this. We walk around Odessa and look around at things but never have any serious talks about what it could be like if we were together. But she always holds my arm when we walked in public. Her sister comes to stay with us on day 5. Her sister is a Tudor for young children and teaches them English and Spanish. I take us to lunch and dinner. Her sister then returns home the next day. Her sister speaks perfect English and we talked more then I did with her sister who I came there for. Her sister seemed to be the other extreme of her. She was calm and very sweet. And I loved talking with her sister. The conversations had meaning. The next day I say to her at lunch, so do you think you want to come to America and see what it is like with me. She says YES I will come. I asked if she was happy about our time together and she said yes I am happy about it. Then a few minutes pass and she says that I should give her money after lunch for her to get her passport. I said "NO" I will wait until I get home to the states. She then she says "SO YOU DONT TRUST ME". I then say no and that I will wait until I get back home to the states. And then the next days go smooth and she seems a little happier. We never got romantic or kiss at all. We walked into a bookstore and I said to her to find a book for herself to get. She then picked 3 books. I bought them for her. She would hold my arm in pubic when we walked in the street and sometimes hold hands and we took some pictures together. And she remarked to me that she is observing everything about me and analyzing my actions. She always looked like she was in deep thought about something. But at the same time I am always wondering if her intentions were true. But I always act interested in what she might have to say. We then change the subject. On my last night she cooks me a wonderful diner and we watch a movie. I even take a movie of her saying hello to all of my friends back home and she seemed very happy that I was doing this. Then we go to bed. She has her own room and so do I . We wake up the next day and she just drinks some juice and doesn?t make any effort to talk to me at all. She calls a taxi for us. We take the taxi to the airport and she sits in the front next to the driver and I sit in the back. No talking at all. Just silence. We get to the airport and I get out and she gets out, I give her a hug and I felt like it did not matter to her. She says just go in there and wait until you see your flight posted on the board. I get home to the States and call her and she says "When are you sending the money so I can get a passport". I tell her I will send $200 and she said could it be $300 so I can take a course in accounting. I send $300 and then we talk for the next 3 weeks and she says she is not feeling well. The next week is 5 weeks that I am home from the Ukraine visit and she sends me a text message that says (Hello my dear, I have visited my doctor today and he has said that he thinks I am not well and he wants me to have serious medical exam in KIEV. I need about $300 very urgently and I am leaving tomorrow. So if you want to help me please send it today. I then call her and she says she doesn?t feel well. She then says I will talk with you when I get back from KIEV. I call her a few days later and I say to her how did it go in Kiev. She said it is very bad, they found a tumor and I have a serious problem. She then says she is not coming to America and she does not want my help and I should go on with my life and meet another girl. She said that she does not want me to feel sorry for her and she will deal with this on her own. She tells me she does not want to talk to anybody and to leave her alone and this is A BIG PROBLEM. I THEN TELL HER THAT I WILL WAIT FOR HER TO GET BETTER AND I WANT HER TO COME TO AMERICA. She says that she can?t even pass the physical exam to get to America. She then says leave me alone, I do not want to talk to you. She hangs up. 3 days later I call her sister and her sister tells me, yes my sister has a tumor and it has to be operated on. It is not cancer but in the thyroid and she says her sister is depressed because after this operation she might not be able to have children and this is probably the reason for her anger. She also said I can call her again and she will let me know how things are going there. So the most confusing thing to me is that Christmas is only 1 week from now. Why is she telling me to not call her anymore when this is a perfect time for me to give her more money for a Christmas present.. And her birthday is Feb 11th which is only 2 months away. If she knows she could probably get more money from me, why is she ending it now.


Posted by: Pin Boy

woh!!! very tough on the eyes when your post is not separated into paragraphs! please keep this in mind for future posts. welcome and good luck.

pin boy


Posted by: Pin Boy

okay, i did look at your post and it's an out and out scam! move on and don't waste another second on this con artist.

she's only happy when you buy her something? she calls you a cheapskate and you would still entertain the thought of this woman? what would she be like to try to live with day in and day out? hell on wheels most likely. but it would never get that far cause she's trying to milk you. please don't let yourself get taken. it only spreads to other women who may get ideas and then in the end it makes it harder for everyone to separate the serious from the sinners.

pin boy

ps to answer your question, she's an absolute pro!


Posted by: nocomfortzone

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
I met a young 33-year-old girl from Kherson, Ukraine on an international dating site. We talked with each other for 6 months. It started as emails and then we spoke on the phone. She told me how important it was for her to have a family one-day with a good man and raise children and give them a good education in America. And our talks everyday were very nice. We always talked for at least 30 minutes every 3 or 4 days. I told her I would come to see her. I then went to the Ukraine to spend 7 days with her. She met me in Odessa and came to the airport to pick me up with a driver that I paid for in advance. Before I came to see her she was very excited about me coming. I even started to call her every day before I went to see her. Our first day together we went to eat dinner and it was very relaxing and nice. We take a few pictures also. On the second day there we ate lunch and then we walked into a shopping mall that had beautiful shops. She was picking up nice pocket books and looking at them and I just watched her and I made comments like "That one is nice". And we then went into other shops and looked around. When we left the shops and started to walk in the street her mood became very different towards me. I said to her what is wrong and she said nothing is wrong. I asked again and she said nothing is wrong. I then asked her if she was mad that I did not buy her anything in the shops. She got very angry and said that I was a penny pincher and I was cheap. She said I was totally not aware of how to treat women. She said that I did not pay attention to the little things and she told me she was angry . I have already spent $1200.00 on my plane fare and I also rented a 2-story apartment for $140.00 per day for 7 days and we were eating in the best restaurants in town at about $65.00 a meal in U S dollars. And we ate out 2 to 3 times a day. When we got back to the apartment she said she was packing her things and leaving in the morning to go back home. I then said to her that she is being ridiculous about this. I told her I just got here yesterday afternoon and she is not being fair to me. She then yelled " YOU ARE WAITING FOR THE RESULT. I said what does that mean. I said to her that I came to the Ukraine to see only her and I want to see if we are good for each other. And I have just arrived here yesterday. She said that I was waiting to see if she would have sex with me and then I would probably get her presents. She said that I was waiting to see if she would sleep with me. But the truth is I did not go there at all for sex. I truly was looking to see her and only her and to see if we were emotionally compatible. I went there looking for a life partner and the future mother of my children, not a sex toy. So I then convinced her to stay and not go home. She said that we were both thinking different things about the situation. And she said that maybe I was sincere in my actions. On day 3 we go have lunch and she gets a call from her mother. Her mother asks her if it is going well with me and she tells her mother that she does not know if I am the right one and she needs more time to be with me. Her mother then tells her that she wont come to Odessa to meet us because if she is unsure about me it was a waste of time to meet me. Then she hangs up with her mother and starts crying and tells me her mother told her to not even come back home. She tells me her mother wants her to find someone and that she is too picky. Now at this point I really donÍt know who really called her on her cell phone. She could have made that all up. I then feel bad for her and I tell her that we should go to the shops again. She says NO. And I ask her again and she says why should we go there. So we go, and I buy her a lady's handbag for $90.00. It is the one she picked up the day before when we had our little fight. Then I go into another shop and spend $185 on cosmetics for her. She is now in a better mood and she says thank you to me. At lunch on day 4 she tells me stories about meetings with other men in the last 3 years that have turned out horrible. And how she trusts nobody. We never speak about what our future together could be like. We just watch television and go out to lunch and dinners. But I remember thinking to myself that something just does not feel right about this. We walk around Odessa and look around at things but never have any serious talks about what it could be like if we were together. But she always holds my arm when we walked in public. Her sister comes to stay with us on day 5. Her sister is a Tudor for young children and teaches them English and Spanish. I take us to lunch and dinner. Her sister then returns home the next day. Her sister speaks perfect English and we talked more then I did with her sister who I came there for. Her sister seemed to be the other extreme of her. She was calm and very sweet. And I loved talking with her sister. The conversations had meaning. The next day I say to her at lunch, so do you think you want to come to America and see what it is like with me. She says YES I will come. I asked if she was happy about our time together and she said yes I am happy about it. Then a few minutes pass and she says that I should give her money after lunch for her to get her passport. I said "NO" I will wait until I get home to the states. She then she says "SO YOU DONT TRUST ME". I then say no and that I will wait until I get back home to the states. And then the next days go smooth and she seems a little happier. We never got romantic or kiss at all. We walked into a bookstore and I said to her to find a book for herself to get. She then picked 3 books. I bought them for her. She would hold my arm in pubic when we walked in the street and sometimes hold hands and we took some pictures together. And she remarked to me that she is observing everything about me and analyzing my actions. She always looked like she was in deep thought about something. But at the same time I am always wondering if her intentions were true. But I always act interested in what she might have to say. We then change the subject. On my last night she cooks me a wonderful diner and we watch a movie. I even take a movie of her saying hello to all of my friends back home and she seemed very happy that I was doing this. Then we go to bed. She has her own room and so do I . We wake up the next day and she just drinks some juice and doesnÍt make any effort to talk to me at all. She calls a taxi for us. We take the taxi to the airport and she sits in the front next to the driver and I sit in the back. No talking at all. Just silence. We get to the airport and I get out and she gets out, I give her a hug and I felt like it did not matter to her. She says just go in there and wait until you see your flight posted on the board. I get home to the States and call her and she says "When are you sending the money so I can get a passport". I tell her I will send $200 and she said could it be $300 so I can take a course in accounting. I send $300 and then we talk for the next 3 weeks and she says she is not feeling well. The next week is 5 weeks that I am home from the Ukraine visit and she sends me a text message that says (Hello my dear, I have visited my doctor today and he has said that he thinks I am not well and he wants me to have serious medical exam in KIEV. I need about $300 very urgently and I am leaving tomorrow. So if you want to help me please send it today. I then call her and she says she doesnÍt feel well. She then says I will talk with you when I get back from KIEV. I call her a few days later and I say to her how did it go in Kiev. She said it is very bad, they found a tumor and I have a serious problem. She then says she is not coming to America and she does not want my help and I should go on with my life and meet another girl. She said that she does not want me to feel sorry for her and she will deal with this on her own. She tells me she does not want to talk to anybody and to leave her alone and this is A BIG PROBLEM. I THEN TELL HER THAT I WILL WAIT FOR HER TO GET BETTER AND I WANT HER TO COME TO AMERICA. She says that she canÍt even pass the physical exam to get to America. She then says leave me alone, I donÍt want to talk to you. She hangs up. 3 days later I call her sister and her sister tells me, yes my sister has a tumor and it has to be operated on. She then says that her sister is upset because after the operation she might not be able to have children and she needs treatments. She also said I can call her again and she will let me know how things are going there


I gotta say it sounds like she is genuine, however, genuinely a bit of a basket case emotionally and sadly she sounds like she is having a tough time physically and trouble dealing with her life at moment. It does not sound like you've both created enough trust and she sounds like she was almost not willing to trust a guy anyway as she obviously been burnt before and not much of a willing spirit. She sounds like she is looking for, and expecting the worst in people. She sounded like she was playing games with you about passport situation and manipulating you to feel bad. She sounds like she did not treat you with enough respect. It is sad, as it does not sound like she even knows how to be in a relationship and all she knows is how to hurt herself and others. The mother sitaution did not sound very supportive aswell. She sounds like she is comfortable feeling like a victim and the world is against her and knows no other wayt of being in this world. So it's up to you if you feel strongly enough about her to work any type of basis for trust and go from there. If you see some light there or spark of hope the ball is in your court. She sounds like she is a long way from a positive frame of mind. Help her if you feel like a genuine friend but relationship wise i would not go there at present. All the best with whatever you choose to do.


Posted by: Cheburashka

Forget about her. Date the sister!


Posted by: Northernlight

rp774:
I realize that it was you who went out of your way for this lady. It was your time away from work, your time, and alot of your money on the trip etc.

I would like to ask you just one question, if I may.

In the mall on the first day of sightseeing, you could tell that she was very interested in a handbag. Could maybe you have bought her a handbag and told her something to the effect that; the bag would go very well in hand when the two of you were sightseeing together?

Kirk

ps I think I read somewhere in the forum here that it is a nice gesture to be gift giving when meeting someone.


Posted by: GoeastLJ

Doesn't sound like a scam, but neither does she sound like relationship material. I think the bright red flags are how she readily accepted you to buy her presents - she in fact expected you to buy her presents. Sounds like blackmail. From my little experience (2 Ukrainians, including a 33 year old from Kherson, 1 Russian), you have jump through hoops to buy anything for these women. And they always want to lead you to the cheapest restaurants. This lady may have emotional problems and we should feel sorry for her, but it still does not help your cause. I side with NCZ - help her as a friend if you like (and you are loaded), but don't keep preparing room for her in your heart. You will become even more emotionally attached to her when she may be looking at you as just another one of her horrible encounters. You may already be attached to this lady, but it may be a good idea to move on. Stop digging or you may find it hard to get out.


Posted by: firemansam

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
.... But I remember thinking to myself that something just does not feel right about this.

Trust that feeling. This woman will only bring you grief.....


Posted by: royalpalace774

I brought with me a nice red wine color lady's wallet and gave that to her on the first day and I brought her some vitamins that she asked me to get her. She loved the wallet. The wallet cost was $75.00 But my intention was to buy her some more nice things after I was there for about 4 days. This situation was on my 2nd day there . The night before that I spent $90.00 U S on dinner. I dont mind spending , I dont think I should be told how to spend.


Posted by: Seaview

Horrible.

You should have told her to f... off on the day she started to play all these tricks.

She doesn't work not to miss your visit and she is ready to leave you on the first day of your arrival because you didn't buy her a hand-bag. Very logical. Just forget it all. Don't send her a penny. You are not guilty of her tumor or whatever. That's all. It's possible that they are in one team with her "sister".

Do you really want a hysterical greedy unemployed ***** to become your life-partner?


Posted by: mistermopar

royalpalace774,if you are planing to be with her I hope you are a rich man.
My thoughts are RUN...RUN like you have never ran before.

Randy


Posted by: Northernlight

SV that is priceless...lmao I wish I would have found this forum sooner rather than later. you people would have saved me alot of grief, like your trying to help rp774.

Some of us need a 10 lb sledge to the head.


Posted by: Jerico

I 100 percent agree with Pinboy.
Shes a scammer .
Dont waste another penny on her.
She also doesn`t appreciate you actually went to meet her?
I however dont think shes a pro.
From your story of your trip it sounds like she was telling you from the beginning she wants gifts and money and nice dinners.
I know that is hard to say no to these women over there but learn to say it.
Doesn`t even kiss you? Whats with that. Not saying you have to sleep with her but come on.
I dont know i could be wrong but my advice is start looking for another women. Try Russia your next trip as I keep hearing about these Kiev women using foreign men for gifts and resturants constantly.
I am sure this happens in Russia also but you dont hear about it as much as Kiev or Odessa.
My friend went there in March of this year and similar story.
JMHO
Jerry


Posted by: Pin Boy

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
I dont mind spending , I dont think I should be told how to spend.


EXACTLY!

pin boy

ps i'd be VERY surpised if she has a tumor. seems like too much of a coincidence. she saw you open your wallet rather easily while you were there, plus you sent her money when you returned home after she treated you like crap, so she figures why not try to milk you some more.


Posted by: GoingToRussia

It doesn't matter if she is a scammer or not. She will never be happy with anything or anyone until she gets some professional help. She lives to be unhappy and makes everyone around her unhappy.

Forget her and try again. I'm not sure how long you waited until you saw her but I got to know my wife 4 months before I saw her. My point is, get to know someone before you go. I discovered that we had so many things in common that we like to do. This is what made me decide to see her. I probably talked to 10 different Russian women before I found someone I wanted to see.

Best of luck to you and Happy Landings!


Posted by: I/O

Not cancer, no depression, no ill health. This is a classic good cop, bad cop pair. I would even doubt if the other one was her sister.

Seen it all. Launch the attack to "Guilt Trip" you then once you are on the back foot, she is calling the shots. She is obviously quite good at what she does and then gives you the flick before it goes too far so you wont spread the word.

Sorry you invested your emotions in her. The money is a bit frustrating but that is not so personal. She didn't mind taking you to the top end eating places. Wow. $90 for a meal for 2 of you in Odessa is very much the top end.

There is a percentage, all be it a small percentage, that resent the fact that men from western countries appear to have some economic advantage and they seem to take some twisted pleasure in trying to use them for a fancy time, then they have their twisted little laugh after he has gone.

Just one final comment, a foreign passport in Ukraine does NOT cost $2-300, it costs slightly less than $100. Figure it out for yourself.


Posted by: Brad-in-Minn

WOW. Sounds like a trip I had to Ukraine. Mariopul in fact. I met her there along with her interpretor and from there the $5,000.00 date started!!! I'm young and successful and not just a rich old man. I flew her, the interpretor, and I to Kiev and stayed that the finest apartment available with FULL SERVICE!!!! It was run like a fine hotel. I got some after the 5th day stayin but certainly not worth the money spent. I flew the interpretor back to Mariopul two days early but what a cold Woman. Yes She loved shopping! I met her parent when we went back but HUGE things happened that any man would know that somethings wrong. We had a tough flight back to Maripoul as weather was bad. I paid much money to fly us to Domesk and arrange a driver to drive us back to Mariopul.

Long story SHORT: My International $5,000.00 date loved the trip to Kiev. It was the first time she flew. I gave her the shopping spree she was looking for in Kiev, and once home I left her with a good amount of money. Her Interpretor made it BIG time as I paid 100% of trip, apartment "Special extra apartment", and food including all of our high price dinners at exclusive restaurants. Boy did she eat!!! I got laid, but during the whole visit, I got screwed!!! Never again I said. When I left for the airport early in the morning with the girl I had just dumped all this money and affection on, she didn't even kiss me goodbye!!! She jumped out and ran into to her apartment. I am not a dumb Man. I knew right there I had just gave two Women who acted like they never new each other, a GREAT 1 week all inclusive and paid trip to Kiev!!! If there is any solitude in this experience, it is that I thank God I could afford such a trip and a scam. I also think about the DUMP they live in and hope as they laughed and accounted how they may have taken some money from me by means not right, I went home and ended it with out ever thinking again about the place she lives in, The hopes her parents had for her, and the road she chose)) You loose Elena M. I doubt your little scam will work again.


Better news!!!! Soon afterward I joined ELENASMODELS.COM best thing I ever did!!! The site is very against Scams and is very reputable when it comes to Women from Russia or ??? It also encourages the Woman to speak or write English to the Men. I found the most beautiful, educated, sincere Woman of all of my dreams!!!! That was 1 year ago. Of course I have traveled to see her and we rented an apartment for a month. Her final interview in Moscow is 1-16-07. She already has the ticket to our home, and we just had approval from the local church to marry us in mid March.


My point, I wish I never made a $5,000.00 date in Ukraine!!!! Seems this is happening alot. Especially in Kiev. Yes you will meet the girl, But you may expect a huge dating bill and not anything towards marriage.

After that


Posted by: GoingToRussia

Thanks RoyalPlace and Brad for sharing your stories. It is a great example of the "Russian vacation" scam and members need to hear this so they are aware of what can happen. Maybe Royal can share a picture with Brad to see if it the same girl. Sorry for your disappointment guys but as Brad said, he didn't give up and found the girl of his dreams on Elena's Models ... which is where I also found my wife!!!

Congrats on your upcoming wedding Brad!!!


Posted by: ira156

Scammer maybe....but a b1tch is a b1tch in any language....it would be just a taste of things to come.....move on


Posted by: Ade

Hi,

You hardly know her and she's giving you this level of grief?? Forget it - you wouldn't put up with it from a woman at home, so don't put up with it from a woman elsewhere.

She may not be a scammer, but she sounds at least to be a brat. If you think you're worth more, get rid and move on.

Good luck for the future,

Ade


Posted by: Brad-in-Minn

For me? I would prefer to let go and let God.

She, or the "Scammer" has chosen her destiny. I was not a bad, ugly poor, or dull man. The ukrainian Maripoul Woman I speak of was probably promised Money from the Interpretor of "Maripoul Mariage agency". Seems her and the interpretor said they never met but took to each other like Sisters for a long time and lived close to each other. I am the one who was blessed!!! These Woman are not gifted or qualified to make much money off one good looking woman in Maripoul. And the Maripoul woman, "Elena Mozevhatina - age 31" Her Interpretor "Lyudmila ?" The interpretor is married but I latter found Lyudmila pictured right along with other "Available" women on MARIPOUL MARIAGE AGENCY.COM

To the Maripoul Marriage Agency, Lyudmila, and yes, Elena. My $5,000.00 date was much less expensive than spending a lifetime with a women who can not keep her personal misgivings of failure. You shortly lived like a Queen, but for the rest of you life you will live like you do in this day to day life in Maripoul. Your Prince has left the building!

Elena, you are 31 now. You will need much luck to snag another. I don't think it wil happen again for you. Too bad.


Posted by: I/O

Quote:
Mozevhatina
Can someone who is versed with Russian / Ukrainian names tell me if this is a Ukrainian name. It doesn't ring with me, but I am no expert.


Posted by: Dave_N_Elvira

Got my reservations in calling her a scammer yet, but the potential to bait you has definitely been established. One thing I have no problems labelling her as is a user and poor marriage material. Fireman was spot on with his comment. If you are having doubts then the likelihood is this woman will give you grief. And for the better part she has.

Too many red flags here that I don’t like. Red flags I see are:

1. The lack of romance she is showing you. If she is genuine she does not have an attraction to you. If non genuine, the reason for the lack is romance is obvious. I have seen a situation where the man and lady are genuine but no spark exists with a good friend I met in St Petersburg. He tried to buy her love with gifts and trips but if the spark is not there all the money in the world wont change the outcome. Your story lacks any spark from the lady you saw.
2. The work thing. What a load of crock. The losing your job thing is a big ruse. When my wife needed time off working she got paid someone to fill in for her because she didn’t have holiday time. She said it was common practice as well to do things like this.
3. Very bad sign for a lady to call you cheap considering what you had offered to date. Its typical behaviour from the user types. They guilt you into spending. A genuine lady will not do that and most cases will chastise you if you are careless with your money.

With the not wanting to speak with you, I had the same thing happen with the wife when she had to undergo an operation. Some women can get pretty isolative in situations like that. Took a lot of persistence before the wife spoke to me, and a lot of reassurance on my part that whatever the problem was I would be there for her.

This is a potential reason why she doesn’t want to speak with you, but even taking that into account you would be mad to try contact this one again on past behaviour. You have been presented an ideal opportunity to cut this one loose and you should use it. Don’t turn back at all.

It can be tough to overcome but you will and you will be all wiser for it. A few of us have been burnt in similar situations and we came out all the more better for it and finally found the right woman. Plenty of decent women out there. When you encounter one you will know and will see what a vast difference she is to this one who is using you. Just an idea when you go searching again. Try picking a location that interests you and find a decent agency where you are going and use the matchmaking service. This way you get to see a place you want and meet women at your leisure. When the right one comes along you will know and if she doesn’t, you have gotten a great vacation at least out of it. Did that when I visited St Petersburg and got lucky on both counts. A good matchmaker can avoid you ending up with the sort of lady you have now.


Posted by: gonlaz

Hey dude, I am also a n00b on the board but I can even tell that this one is full of bat poop. All the asking, no, demanding of money is what signaled me.

You spoke with her for 6 months and never once spoke of your future? Well, there you go sir, stay far away.

Just in the week or so that I have been here, I have noticed that most guys here are very knowledgeable and it's a good idea to pay attention to what they advise - of course you make your own decisions naturally.


Good luck dude


Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pin Boy
okay, i did look at your post and it's an out and out scam! move on and don't waste another second on this con artist.

she's only happy when you buy her something? she calls you a cheapskate and you would still entertain the thought of this woman? what would she be like to try to live with day in and day out? hell on wheels most likely. but it would never get that far cause she's trying to milk you. please don't let yourself get taken. it only spreads to other women who may get ideas and then in the end it makes it harder for everyone to separate the serious from the sinners.

pin boy

ps to answer your question, she's an absolute pro!



Agree... a real pro... go after the sister...


Posted by: Texas Proud

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cheburashka
Forget about her. Date the sister!


HaHa.... I had typed mine before getting to this post....

See... some people see the good..


Posted by: nocomfortzone

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
I brought with me a nice red wine color lady's wallet and gave that to her on the first day and I brought her some vitamins that she asked me to get her. She loved the wallet. The wallet cost was $75.00 But my intention was to buy her some more nice things after I was there for about 4 days. This situation was on my 2nd day there . The night before that I spent $90.00 U S on dinner. I dont mind spending , I dont think I should be told how to spend.


Mate, what is with keeping track in detail of this money you spent? I don't understand that
It's seems like a big deal to you so it seems like you've got your own issues with money and she would be the last person to support you getting over that.
I've read the other comments, some of them harsh and assuming she is a scammer straight away. I guess i give people the benefit of the doubt and never been in that situation. Others have got burnt by scammers and ready to believe any tough life story by some woman there automatically has to be a scam which is completely understandable. The bottom line is from your point of view are you worthy of better treatment from a woman you want to spend you life with? I think you know the answer to that in relation to this woman and hope you treat yourself well by not letting this woman emotional manipulate you anymore. Be a friend if you must be, but not at the cost of your own well being and integrity.


Posted by: andreas

Seems everyone has said it here, personally I would have dumped her after the mall incident and helped her pack


Posted by: Cheburashka

Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas Proud
HaHa.... I had typed mine before getting to this post....

See... some people see the good..


Great minds think alike my Texas brother!!!!!


Posted by: royalpalace774

This is my comment to NOCOMFORTZONE: If you just spent $1200.00 on airfare and paid $980.00 in advance for the nicest apartment in Odessa for the 2 of us to stay in. And $90.00 on diner and Given a women a designer wallet and she looked at you the next day and she then called you "a penny pincher" because you did not buy her a $100.00 bag that she looked at in a mall. "HOW WOULD YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?" I thought so. So now please tell me about my issues with money. Are you in the TRUMP family ? I'm asking you this because I am wondering if you would have jumped over backward and bought her everything she wanted. And I am also wondering why you would have bought her whatever she wanted which leads me to say that I think it might be you that has an issue with money. Maybe you should find out why you would buy a women what she wants after she insults you. Mate, I think you just might have some problems of self esteem. By the way I just want to tell you that I was insulted by her after spending about $2480.00. But I could be off by a couple of dollars. I also forgot that the insult was told to me after our $70.00 lunch. So NOCOMFORTZONE, I was not comfortable after leaving the mall.


Posted by: Dave_N_Elvira

Royal,
NCZ’s comments were about the way you say I paid this much, I paid that much etc etc ad nauseum. Makes it kind of sound like you were walking around with a ledger recording every expense. Even in your reply to him you mention on 5 separate occasions what you paid for things. There is no need to. You say you don’t care about the money spent. Then why emphasise it? Nobody cares whether you paid $10 or $1000 for the wallet for her. Your argument doesn’t carry more weight because you spent more money. The issue you have is the way she behaved to you. Emphasise that.


Posted by: Ms.Smarty Pants

Quote:
Originally Posted by I/O
Can someone who is versed with Russian / Ukrainian names tell me if this is a Ukrainian name. It doesn't ring with me, but I am no expert.


This name may be Russian/Ukrainian/Belorus/Polish/Jewish name of woman.


Posted by: royalpalace774

To Dave & Elvira: Why not state the facts. If I dont tell you the details exactly how they happened how will you be sure of what kind of answer you are going to tell me. If I told you I took her to Mcdonalds for all of our meals and I rented a $22.00 a day apartment and I brought her nothing , your answers to me would be different. I am only telling you details as they happened. If I left out the numbers would that change anything. No, it wouldnt. What If I tell you I am coming to your city tomorrow and I need you to pick me up at the airport. Do you want to know what time to come get me or should I let you guess. When your wife asks you to do her a favor and meet her somewhere do you want to know the exact time or are you O K with not knowing the details. I call this great communication on my part. I am just letting people know facts without sugar coating them. I also forgot to tell you that I went to law school, but decided on a different trade. They teach you to pay attention to "DETAILS". It's the only way to be an A student.


Posted by: Ms.Smarty Pants

royalpalace774, could you tell us what for do you need this woman? She and her "sister" (I am absolutely sure that the second woman was not her sister; she is like actress for you also) decided "to milk" you. Unfortunately, it is true. Now you have experience! Good luck!


Posted by: chippie

Quote:
Originally Posted by Seaview
Horrible.

You should have told her to f... off on the day she started to play all these tricks.

She doesn't work not to miss your visit and she is ready to leave you on the first day of your arrival because you didn't buy her a hand-bag. Very logical. Just forget it all. Don't send her a penny. You are not guilty of her tumor or whatever. That's all. It's possible that they are in one team with her "sister".

Do you really want a hysterical greedy unemployed ***** to become your life-partner?


Royalpalace774,

I think that seaview was right on. Also when she told you that she couldn't pass the physical, that shouls have also been a red flag. Maybe she has something communicable that the USA doesn't want to import!
If you spend money like that while dating, then she will ALWAYS expect it.
Count your many blessings.

" $1200.00 on my plane fare"
"2-story apartment for $140.00 per day for 7 days "
"best restaurants in town at about $65.00 a meal in U S dollars 2 to 3 times a day."
" lady's handbag for $90.00."
"spend $185 on cosmetics"

Not having to live with and pay for this b*tch for the rest of your life.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!PRICE LESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There is a reason they call them red flags. Yes it was expensive, but hopefully you learned a lesson. She definitely gives FSU women a bad name.

Chippie


Posted by: Dave_N_Elvira

Royal,
It’s not a case on paying attention to detail. It’s a case on what you are emphasising. A fair portion of what you emphasised was how much you spent. You come across as someone who is more concerned over the money you lost rather than the outcome of your meeting. You have emphasised what you spent to get there, what you spent on accommodation, what you spent on a wallet, what you spent on lunch and dinner and what you were going to spend. Most people don’t place that sort of emphasis on their expenditure. Maybe it was not your intention to put so much emphasis into what you spent but that is the impression a few people will get from your post.


Posted by: Pin Boy

i think the question of this post has been answered; the girl was not sincere and royal most likely has come to the realization that this girl is not the one. i think this thread has run its course.

pin boy


Posted by: sidney

Dave I would have to disagree. I find it informative as far as possible expenses for the search. There have been posters that broke down every detail for agencies, transport, hotel/apartment, dining, entertainment, etc.
I do agree that there is the possibility of disease and therefor denial for a visa but this should have been questioned further. My wife also feel that the mother could be upset with her daughter being single and 33 YO.
It was almost painful seeing how she mistreated. Definately past baggage and not for anyone looking for long term. The only positive is that you probably will not find anyone worse as a match.
Sid


Posted by: royalpalace774

I can see where you are coming from. I dont agree with you , but everyone has an opinion. Emphasising the dollar amount is only my way of letting the readers know that I was called a "PENNY PINCHER by this women after investing 6 months of my time and energy and my money. I almost think that you think I should have done exactly as this lady wanted on my 2nd dAY with her. It is easier for me to tell you that I spent 6 months of my time instead of saying I spent some time. It is easier for me to tell you that I spent $90.00 on a dinner than tell you I took her to diner. My details seem to bother you. If I was a reader here I would like to know if you took her to Mcdonalds and spent $2.00 on her meals or did you go all out and have fine dining. I am only stating what I spent because all of the drama happened on my 2nd day there and it is just the way I am telling the story. Remember she told me I was a "PENNY PINCHER" All I wanted the readers of this forum to know was what I have allready invested into this. In time and money. I am just giving information so everybody can put the picture in their mind. And is it not obvious that I am unhappy with the outcome. I would not be asking for any opinions if I thought it turned out O K. So please again understand what I am trying to convey. There is a difference between taking her to Mcdonalds and taking her to a fine restaurant. What is your problem with me letting the readers know the dollar amount. Would you feel better about me if I re-phrase my comments and just state "I took her to diner and walked in a mall. She picked up some purses and I did not buy her anything. We then left and she became angry.) This sounds a little boring to me. I like to know more , dont you. There is a difference between me telling you "I WON THE LOTTERY and I made $2.00 and "I WON THE LOTTERY and I made $500,000 . And the boring way to say it " I WON THE LOTTERY.


Posted by: nocomfortzone

Quote:
Originally Posted by royalpalace774
This is my comment to NOCOMFORTZONE: If you just spent $1200.00 on airfare and paid $980.00 in advance for the nicest apartment in Odessa for the 2 of us to stay in. And $90.00 on diner and Given a women a designer wallet and she looked at you the next day and she then called you "a penny pincher" because you did not buy her a $100.00 bag that she looked at in a mall. "HOW WOULD YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?"

Personally i would be paying far more attention to the ledger of our feelings, atmosphere and emotions, not what i spent. Having said that, if i was in your situation you described and she said that, i'd hope i'd realise straight away this womans perspective is way of base and she was on a completely different wavelength to me about money spending in life. I would feel like she is not a woman i want to spend quality time with and spend my attention on a woman that respects me and has qualities i admire in a woman.



Quote:
I thought so. So now please tell me about my issues with money. Are you in the TRUMP family ?

I'm sorry if i uspet you with they way i wrote but i can only be completely honest in how i percieve the situation from the way you described


Quote:
I'm asking you this because I am wondering if you would have jumped over backward and bought her everything she wanted.


Sorry but that is just not the way i am with woman. I want myself and every individual to feel empowered themself and i don't see some woman from FSU being helpless and needing me to buy them everything they wanted. I'm *very* interested in a woman liking me for who i am, not how i spend money and superficial things.

Quote:
And I am also wondering why you would have bought her whatever she wanted
You've obviously assumed something here i've never indicated

[QUOTE}
which leads me
[/QUOTE]
astray in your thinking

Quote:
By the way I just want to tell you that I was insulted by her after spending about $2480.00.


from this i read the amount is important enough to you to decide on whether you feel insulted....hmmmm....

Quote:

But I could be off by a couple of dollars. I also forgot that the insult was told to me after our $70.00 lunch. So NOCOMFORTZONE, I was not comfortable after leaving the mall.


Bingo! That is the crux of that matter. Follow your feelings mate.
If they were indicating you were not feeling comfortable then pay close attention to why. Clearly the way she treated you and what she said was disgraceful. Why put up with it? Noboby deserves that type of crap especially after they've put the time and energy into getting to know something about this woman and then travelled half way across the world. Her values are clearly misguided to say what she said.
Anyway, i understand you feel emotional about it and it was not my intention to make you feel any more pain. Clearly you deserve better and should put your attention to woman that deserve your care and most mportantly woman that thinks enough about herself to think she deserves care and love. The woman you visited clearly has shown qualities that are not in harmony with this. Attract a woman into your life that is serious about being *happy* for herself and for you. I genuinely wish you well and there are plenty of wonderful, loving woman all over the world. If you keep your eyes , mind and heart open i'm sure you will find someone that is willing to share life with you that is a match. Never give in mate. frflowr:


Posted by: Raspberry

[QUOTE-royalpalace774]I met a young 33-year-old girl from Kherson, Ukraine on an international dating site........She said she is giving the priority to our meeting in Odessa.......[/QUOTE]

Granted, there is a lot of stuff to do in Odessa, but Kherson is not all that far away. Why does she not want you to visit her in her own home town? Sounds like she has something to hide.

The girls I met in Ukraine could have asked me to meet them in another city, but wanted to show off their home towns.

[QUOTE-royalpalace774]She got very angry and said that I was a penny pincher and I was cheap. She said I was totally not aware of how to treat women. She said that I did not pay attention to the little things and she told me she was angry . I have already spent $1200.00 on my plane fare and I also rented a 2-story apartment for $140.00 per day....... [/QUOTE]

Was it your choice? Expensive accomodations looks like a red flag. In fact, one of the agencies in Sochi was saying that having a girl meet you at the Radisson(western style hotel, and one of the most expensive)is a red flag for a professional dater.

Granted, Odessa is the second-most expensive city in Ukraine behind Kiev. An APARTMENT for $140? Shouldn't apartments be LESS expensive than hotels?

Additionally, if they had been genuinely interested in you as a person, they also would be looking out after your interests. All of the ladies I met in Ukraine were making sure I was not getting ripped off or overcharged on anything.

[QUOTE-royalpalace774]I have visited my doctor today and he has said that he thinks I am not well and he wants me to have serious medical exam in KIEV. I need about $300 very urgently and I am leaving tomorrow. So if you want to help me please send it today. [/QUOTE]

Quite often this is a legitimate concern among women. My mom miscarried the first time out, but had been corrected, and I am living proof of that. But the treatment essentially is just to take some thyroid medication, and doesn't require surgery or any expensive type of treatments.

So this may(or may not)be a legit scenerio. But if they're asking for money...

[QUOTE-Pin Boy] woh!!! very tough on the eyes when your post is not separated into paragraphs! please keep this in mind for future posts. welcome and good luck. [/QUOTE]

Good point for ALL writers on this board!!

[QUOTE-royalpalace774]I dont mind spending , I dont think I should be told how to spend. [/QUOTE]

I totally agree there. The amount you spend isn't the issue, as long as you feel comfortable doing so. But when someone tells you that you ought to spend your money in such-and-such a way, that is a bad sign.

[QUOTE-mistermopar]My thoughts are RUN...RUN like you have never ran before. [/QUOTE] I would agree whole-heartedly!

[QUOTE-Jerico] She also doesn`t appreciate you actually went to meet her?........Doesn`t even kiss you? Whats with that. Not saying you have to sleep with her but come on..... I dont know i could be wrong but my advice is start looking for another women.

I agree here also...


Posted by: royalpalace774

I originally said to her I would go to Kherson and even meet her mom and dad. She said that Odessa had more to do and she found the apartment. When she sent me the info for the apartment she also sent me pictures of it and I told her that it was great. The apartment was right next door to a dating agency called unona. And yes she was a member of the agaency , but she lived in Kherson which she said was 3 and a half hours away by bus taxi. I have to tell you that I priced some hotels and they were very expensive. I found all the hotels there to have prices from $170-$1500 for a small room. But I loved the apartment we stayed in. It looked like it was just built and it was brand new. Wood floors, Two story, 2 beautiful bathrooms a jakuzi. great kitchen. If I go back to Odessa I will rent it again. I loved it. I will tell you one thing I observed is that I did not see any one taking pictures any where. And I thought that was a little strange. I had my camera with me and when I would take pictures the women I was with acted as if I was out of place and she seemed to act a little strange about me snapping some shots. Why did I not see anyone taking pictures anywhere. In my home town everywhere you go you see people having fun taking pictures of one another. I felt like it was tabu there.


Posted by: Dave_N_Elvira

Royal, you dont need to tell people you invested time and money. Everybody here already knows that. Quite a few invested time and money into similar relationships to have them crash and burn in similar circumstances. The thing you should be angry about is not the money but the time you invested. Six months for what? When I got scammed it was the screw job done on my feelings and the waste of time that p...ed me off. At the end of the day the constant avalanche of scammers in the written letter stage forced me to take an entirely new approach to finding my now wife. What happened to you was bad. You went and saw someone who turned out completely different from what she probably projected herself to be to you. S..t happens. Happened to me the same way 4 years ago. What you need to do is put it behind you and move on with your life. Try a different approach next time. Choose a location you want to see and meet ladies through a matchmaking servie in an agency. Saves wasting 6 months writing to someone who turns out completely different.

ps: I would have ditched here on day 2 without hesitation FYI


Posted by: Pin Boy

these back and forths are not productive. seems like everyone has had his/her say and we should move away from the topic. i'm locking this thread.

pin boy


Russian America Top. Ðåéòèíã ðåñóðñîâ Ðóññêîé Àìåðèêè. Ðåéòèíã@Mail.ru Russian Network USA



Russian Meeting Place Copyright ©2000 - 2008, www.russianmeetingplace.com and Khahsyar and Lena.