AM-RW age difference: A statistical analysis - Russian Ukrainian Belarus Travel Music Woman Dating News

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AM-RW age difference: A statistical analysis
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Posted by: Andy

I've seen the topic discussed often, but have not been able to find any scientific data until I stumbled across this article tonight. Here's the link:

http://odin.prohosting.com/~statguy/

Posted by: Khashyar

Yes, Andy... I have seen this study before...

Thank you for posting information about it.

What is your opinion as to what the study means?

Khashyar

Posted by: klawsite

Hi Andy,

Interesting info to say the least. I find I fall a little out of the norm, because Nadya is closer to my age than what the mean age difference is, but that was my prefrence. I didn't want a big age difference! Still it was interesting to know!

-Kevin

Posted by: Andy

Khashyar, you know what they say about opinions .... , but here's my take.

First take a look at data for AM in the 18-25 group. There was only one AM who married, and I'd venture to guess that it was a young person (perhaps a GI) assigned to an American Embassy in the FSU.
How about the RW in the same age group? 36!
This is, IMHO, is due to cultural differences. Most AM won't even think about the possibility of marriage until their mid-20s. RW, on the other hand, are considered old maids if they're not married prior to their 30s (feel free to correct me if I'm wrong on this one; it's just what I read somewhere).

Now let's look at the other side of the bell curve.
Only two RW age 51 and older were married. How about AM 51 and older? 83!
In this case, I think that you're looking at AM who want 'trophy wives' (for lack of a better word) and RW who want financial stability.

How about we step back for a moment and view all of this in terms of commerce, in the form of buying a car. Think about which options you can't live without, desirable options, options you don't care about, and options you don't want.
Here are the options for a partner:
Age
Intelligence
Physical Beauty
Height
Wealth
Financial Stability
Personality
Non-smoker/smoker
Drug/alcohol use/abuse

Granted, it's not a complete list. But step back for a moment and think about where a RW would rank financial stability vs a AW. How about age? I think that you'd find most AW would be less likely to accept a large age disparity for the sake of financial stability.

From the point of view of a AM, think of it as your dollar going further. I've dated women in the US who have been 10-15 years younger than me. I haven't found many AW in that age bracket to be very mature and responsible. I think that RW, by their mid-20s are very mature and ready to settle down and have a family. Not so with AW. Just look at how much older AW are when they have children.

For me, I will freely admit that I am looking for a 'trophy wife.' Physical appearance is near the top of my list. But I'm not willing to be shortchanged on the other options. It looks like my 'marriage dollar' goes further in the FSU.
As for AW, I've dated several AW up to 15 years younger than me, I've also dated women closer to my age group, including one that was 7 years older than me. The reason why I don't like dating AW close to my age is that they tend to have too much emotional baggage. I won't even start to discuss how often my last gf (8 years younger than me) pulled out her baggage from previous relationships. She's just hitting her mid-30s and she already needs a full sized van to fit all of her luggage.

Posted by: Andy

Sean,
I hope that I didn't offend with my previous post. One of the nice things about the internet is that I can be brutally honest about my intentions, desires, etc. I like to think of it as standing on the balcony of my hotel room while naked. Everyone sees everything about me.
I realize that I sound very shallow in the previous post by saying that I'm looking for a 'trophy wife.' It would have been much better if I had said that I want it all. Physical appearance, intelligence, nonsmoker, personality, mutual interests, etc. I want it all. Age is by far not the most important aspect of the person that I seek. It is, however, quite refreshing to see that so many women take great pride in their personal appearance. I don't feel the same about AW.

I understand what you say about everyone having baggage. I try to keep mine small enough to fit in the overhead. I try to make sure that I never let my past relationships interfere with my current relationship.

As far as physically keeping up with someone younger than me, it hasn't been a problem. I work out daily for about an hour; it keeps me young.

On the sexual side, you have a valid point. I'm treading into this one with a certain amount of trepidation. There are ways to compensate for not performing as often. I try to make it a longer and more pleasurable experience for my partner. No more quick sprints followed by, 'I'm done; I'm going to roll over and take a nap now.'

I suppose that I can summarize it this way. To me, a woman's inner beauty is THE most important thing in a relationship. There are many, many women whom I would find attractive (throughout the world) for their inner beauty. But I also want the pretty wrapping paper. I realize that to openly express my desire for pretty wrapping paper makes me sound extremely shallow, but it is only one of the 'must have' options that I want.
I would be much happier with a woman who is my perfect fit in every aspect save some minor physical appearance flaws than a dropdead gorgeous woman that I have nothing in common with. I've tried that with AW, and it's fun for only a short while. I'm looking for a lasting relationship.

Sorry if my words offend anyone; I can go back inside and put some clothes on, if you like.

Posted by: klawsite

Gentlemen,

I think we would all agree we would not write any of the women with our initial Introduction letter had we not found them visually apealling as well. I think what narrows down our choices is how we connect with the women we correspond with. Like I said in previous posts. Its was a simple decision for me when I decided on the woman I wanted to persue a serious relationship with. It was like we could read each others thoughts about the important things and we felt we already knew each other. It was quite a connection. But, honestly, I would not have contacted Nadya had I not found her visually atractive. Luckily for me, her inner beauty is even more attracting!! That is saying alot!

-Kevin

Posted by: Ray50

I have seen articles written by RW who say that an age difference of 7 to 10 years should be the max. And the RW marriage agency websites will try to entice men to join by saying age is not an issue. I think they are scam sites to tell the truth. It all boils down to what is acceptable for the particular RW. Maybe in rare situations she will be interested in a man 20 years older. Like maybe 10% of the women. I think a RW wants an honest decent AM who can provide her with security and love. If the AM is much older maybe in these rare instances the RW can see beyond the age issue. Think of celebrities like Charlie Chaplin and Woody Allen who mainly persued women much younger. But of course they were celebrities and had more to offer financially. This age issue is a complex one.

Ray

Posted by: bobeee2002

I read the "study" and although I consider myself fairly bright, I still can't draw any conclusions to the big question: Can a twenty year gap 30/50 be bridged or is the divide too great? (on average of course) I too have heard from certain "agencies" that that age gap is not uncommon with eastern women, although I've always felt they were pandering to a certain vanity we all have. I've been divorced for over 20 years and find most of my dates lately have been in their 30's. Perhaps it is their energy level and looks, but I seem very comfortable with a 15 year "American" gap. However, I find these women to be somewhat immature. Any comments?
Thanks

Posted by: Andy

Quote:

Originally posted by sean mcgann
I was speaking about myself, and my own experience's. Are you feeling guilty?

LOL! Sean, I joke at work about being shallower than a puddle. I don't feel guilty admitting that I am an extremely visual person and will not date any woman if I am not physically attracted to her.
I enjoy discussions/debates; it doesn't matter if we walk away with the same opinion as when we entered the discussion. It is the exchange of ideas and viewpoints that I enjoy. Unfortunately, the internet is an impersonal medium where one can never be sure that the message was received as intended by the target audience. My primary concern is (my) making posts that are filled with testosterone. Things can quickly deteriorate on message boards, and I have far too much respect for everyone who contributes to this board to allow that to happen.

Sean, again, I hope that I didn't offend with previous (and future) statements. I still have many 60s male characteristics that haven't been beaten out of me in today's political correctness.

Posted by: Andy

Ray, I probably addressed the age difference very poorly. While I think that many RW seek men close to their age, it appears to not be a 'must have' issue for them. I like to think of desired partners' personality/habits/characteristics in a 'must have,' 'desirable,' and 'must not have' buckets.
What's a 'must have' for you? What's a 'must have' for a RW?
Currently, I think that a RW's emphasis is on a financially stable partner. Think in terms of Maslow's Heirarchy of Needs. Which level of needs are met by a AM vs RM? I don't think that you'd find many AM (who are actively seeking RW) who can't meet a RW's basic needs.
As for what age difference an RW views as acceptable, you're probably right about 7-10 year range. What are they willing to accept? I think that 15-25 years is the max they're willing to accept (on average). Remember that everyone is a snowflake, but whereas the average age difference is small in the west, I can see where an east-west relationship would have a larger gap.

Posted by: Andy

Quote:

Originally posted by bobeee2002
I read the "study" and although I consider myself fairly bright, I still can't draw any conclusions to the big question: Can a twenty year gap 30/50 be bridged or is the divide too great? (on average of course) I too have heard from certain "agencies" that that age gap is not uncommon with eastern women, although I've always felt they were pandering to a certain vanity we all have. I've been divorced for over 20 years and find most of my dates lately have been in their 30's. Perhaps it is their energy level and looks, but I seem very comfortable with a 15 year "American" gap. However, I find these women to be somewhat immature. Any comments?
Thanks

Bob, thanks. I was beginning to feel alone. I tend to date american women more than a decade younger than myself, and have a hard time dealing with the maturity issue. That's why I have decided to look at RW; they seem much more mature than AW.
As for what is a proper age gap, I don't know. I refuse to limit myself based on age alone.